There’s a lovely man who goes by the member name @behind-the-sofa here at Living Sober and also leaves comments at my ‘old’ blog (which I still post in regularly) under the name ‘Mr Tea’. He’s a top bloke who I have also had email exchanges with, he paints beautifully and recommends lovely music like this.
Anyhoo.. he left this comment on my other blog today: “I have this half-formed idea that my sobriety is like a gift that I carry around with me. And while it’s beautiful it’s also fragile like an ornamental egg and there are plenty of people who want to take it away from me. It gives me great pleasure but I have to be constantly vigilant and careful not to drop it or let someone else break it… Now that I’ve had it, held it and experienced life with it I’m not sure I could go back to life without it.”
Wow.
I just love this so much. The image of all of us sober people walking around gently cradling precious beautiful eggs. What’s the brand name – faberge? We get sober and slowly we craft a beautiful ornamental faberge egg, unique only to us.
As we grow stronger in recovery and more robust we smooth the surface, as we slowly heal our emotional selves and find our authenticity we add decoration, colors, textures, jewels. And we walk forever more cradling this precious piece of us. We hold it close, we respect it, we care for it. It looks fragile but that just means we respect it and care for it. It’s up to us to make sure it never gets broken.
I think this is what being ‘in recovery’ means. It doesn’t mean we spend the rest of our lives feeling diseased or damaged, far from it. It means we feel blessed, healed, grateful, proud and special.
Like a beautiful, fragile yet very protected faberge egg.
My egg is a deep forest green with rows of gold thread wrapped around it and priceless pearls dotted here and there.
What does yours look like?
That is the most beautiful analogy! I wish I was a talented artist so that I could paint all of these gorgeous images. I am treasuring my sobriety more and more…. it’s just preciousisn’t it?
My eggs is a dragon’s egg, about the size of a grapefruit. It is softly shimmering and pulsating deep blues and greens with shivering pinpoints of energy and threaded with glowing bronze. It feels warm to the touch and strangely light. It is awe inspiring. xx
My egg is held in my hands out in front of me. It’s the size of a normal hens egg. It hovers just above my hands. It’s a lacy glowing pearl and pale gold. Light feathers out from it. It makes me draw my breath in.
I am a bit old and boring and struggle to really understand this but I am in. Best I can do is a hard boiled chook egg or may go down to the river in the morning and try and find a pukeko egg! No dragons eggs here.l am sure any egg will glow. As I said I don’t really get it
Thank you for that post, I love it…My egg would be a tiny beautiful fragile blue robins egg. When I was a little girl my mother always taught us children a lot about nature and caring. We lived near the woods by a river in the country. We always had baby robins falling out of nests to rescue, baby racoons and bunnies to care for and release. Everything deserves to live, even the smallest spider. My little robins egg symbolizes how fragile life can be, and yes…it in its own way is a symbol of rebirth. I lost my mom to diabetes. Whenever I see a robin I feel somehow its her in spirit watching over me helping me along in my journey, giving me strength and hope to carefully protect my little delicate egg.
What does my egg look like? My egg is the size and shape of a normal hen’s egg but it is not a hen’s egg. It’s colour and hue is constantly changing from cobalt blue to crimson to lemon yellow and every colour in between. Sometimes it appears like semi-transluscent alabaster at other times it is an opaque mars black. My egg stays tucked away in a hidden pocket inside my jacket. The pocket is lined with straw, as is my egg’s want. Most people I meet don’t know that I’ve got an egg but sometimes its existence enters into the conversation. Normally shy but if talked about then it is more than happy to show itself. While it is not a normal hen’s egg there is something growing inside it. I’m not sure what it is but I can feel it’s energy and warmth. Over time we have developed a symbiotic relationship. Its power regulates everything from my brain waves to my heart beat and in return it asks only one thing: that I never drink alcohol again.
Wow, what a fantastic idea from MrTea and for MrsD taking it out to all of us, to encourage us to “own our own eggs”. Great analogy too. Eggs are about birth and renewal, and hope for the future. They contain their own little survival capsule. And to be able to decorate my own egg, and to walk around v v v carefully carrying it. And is it a ” fertilised” one – is it carrying all the things you need to start your new sober life?? Mines a Phoenix egg. I was charged by the mythical bird to carry the last egging the day I became sober ( I’m on day 82 today). It contains my brand new life. I carry it around, strapped to me in a leather pouch filled with golden downy feathers. I sneek a peek every now and then, but it doesn’t change. It’s not time yet. I must be patient. There are still challenges to overcome and quests still to be had. But there will come a day when a little beak pokes it’s way thru the protective shell, and she and I will rise to take full possession of the New Me. So thanks, MrTea and MrsD. My frozen alcohol-numbed inner child needs to be set free!
You’re rising from the ashes AlexP….. Your spirit is growing stronger everyday….. how glorious it will be when your Phoenix takes full flight….
Great way to think of eggs as birth, renewal and hope, so apt for where we all are. And I love the idea of your baby phoenix. Is she perhaps wriggling around in there, stretching her wings, chirping and getting ready?
I have quite a few tattoos and am constantly adding to my body. I have been thinking hard about one to symbolise my sober life. This is possibly quite perfect…..An egg! It would be quirky, symbolic and hugely unique.
Lovin’ the tunes you posted too 😉
That’s cool! let me know if you get it!
I had a tough day today and almost dropped my egg. It would have shattered. The best I could do was hold it in my trembling hands and lay it down next to me in bed – safe until tomorrow.
Well done. Protect that egg. Nothing matters more.
mr tea must be an exceptional man – what a way to describe sobriety that just captures it so perfectly – i just love it and from now on will treasure my egg and care for it diligently – and no one can take it away from me ♥
awwww…… you’re exceptional hetiheti 🙂
Hi Mrs D, Have you read the new posting on your other blog from ‘ A hangover free life’ -Lucy 2610. The progressive disease of alcoholism. Really worth looking at.
My egg is actually holding inside of it an angelic bird . As my sobriety strengthens ,there will be a time that is right, when the bird will break through the protective shell and attach wings to me so I can fly too . In the meantime I protect the angelic bird and then it will protect me .
I also wanted to thank you Jasminasper for checking up on me a few weeks ago… it was really nice. 🙂
….. we must be on the same wavelength 🙂
I just did a painting of a drunk with angel wings…… funny that ay?
I love this post. I’m 11 days sober today so my egg is small, pure white, and extremely fragile. She is covered in layers of various materials from cotton and polyester to silk and fur to protect her from temptations and help her make better choices. With every passing week of sobriety, she sheds a layer of the material and she grows bigger. The larger she is the greater her pride that she has chosen a life of sobriety and the stronger her determination to continue this journey. She is still apprehensive about her decision and what others may think but she is confident that her decision is whats best for her. Eventually, all layers will be shed and she will need a nice shiny coat of paint – red, orange, and yellow which are representative of her journey and her personality. Bold. Courageous. Determined. Strong.
Stuff other people! Protect that egg like a clucky mother hen!
212 days ago I gave myself the very best gift. It was a fragile sober egg with nary a hint of shell to protect it, a new life. I had to hold it very carefully with both hands and build a soft nest to cradle and keep it safe. The nest was made up of baby steps of self-care and fortified by the beautiful words and stories of many kind and talented bloggers ahead of me, showing me the way.
My egg is much stronger now with a beautiful shell of shining aqua blue, the finish occasionally going a bit flat and needing a careful polish. I keep it close in my pocket, knowing that I mustn’t take it for granted and check it daily for cracks. I give my egg a smile each day. I am so incredibly grateful for my sober egg.
Glossy aqua blue and the shell growing stronger and stronger by the day. Nice :-)………. I’m on a similar day count to you!
Right now my egg wears a well buttoned jacket of strong course cloth to protect it from outside forces and to appear brave. Inside my egg change and growth are taking place and the cloth of the jacket is very slowly morphing into beautifully spun delicate silk of many colours and the wooden buttons are turning into shining paua shell of many shapes, to encourage me to reach higher. One day the jacket would like to be taken off to protect another, and to let my egg roll along safely without it.
You’re a star Prudence. Your egg is evolving before our eyes…..
Love this, really beautiful.
I read Mr T’s comment & it really struck me. I just see gorgeous duck egg blue – “Little low heavens” as Gerard Manley Hopkins wrote. Then my imagination ends – or is it sitting in a soft nest lined with delicate feathers, almost glowing in the dappled sun.
I would say it’s glowing in the sun and its reflected light is illuminating your being.
Thats beautiful Morgan
My egg is lightweight, cushioned in a beautiful box with sunshine glowing from it
How succinctly put. I like the fact that it’s light…… light in weight and light emitting from it…. it’s perfect.
I think my egg is beautiful and pure and white. Not eggshell white but luminous pearlised white all over beautified with lots I beautiful precious stones and jewels all white like diamonds and pearls an platinum gold. White and pure because it no longer stores toxins and negativity and slowly decaying. It is glowing a beautiful luminous white light from within.
Your egg is dazzling Squizzi!!!
Lovely! Can see this
My egg is the beautyful green-blue color I associate it with sandy beaches and clear seas. It is decorated with some flying birds on top, and there is a whale on it. It gives a feeling of adventure, and freedom. It’s not so very fragile any more, somehow it became firmer and heavier along the way
Can we come for a swim in your egg? 😉 It sounds like paradise….
My egg would be kintsukuroi “to repair with gold”; which is the Japanese art of repairing pottery with gold or silver lacquer and understanding that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kintsugi – saw this on FB and decided it was a keeper.
You’re a star too Katerina…. really enjoy reading your comments 🙂
wow 🙂 – Morgan
That is sooo cool
My first thought is that my egg looks scrambled still and I have to keep it together with two hands otherwise it’s all going to fall on the ground. Eventually it will look like a reverse-scramble eventually becoming a full egg!! Work in progress, piecing together that egg. 136 days today.
Is it going to go from scrambled to poached to hard boiled? Or is it just going to unscramble and reform itself directly into a whole egg. I think I’d be tempted to eat it if I was carrying around scrambled egg 🙂
As for CharlieGilbert…… no comment 😉
love the reverse scramble and the chook shit!
Jeez you make me laugh Charlie, I just loved it when I read that first line at all hours in the morning, just about wet myself!
Ha ha @CharlieGilbert , I was going to say, mine’s got bits on it too! Specs of dirt and some freckles.
Love it!!
My egg has a bit of crap on it from the hen house.But it’s there and it’s solid and strong.Pure and luminous white. If I can just keep it clean.