Getting through wine o’clock

Late afternoon is often the hardest time to avoid drinking. This Sober Toolbox is a space for sharing tips on how to beat cravings, and for discovering new techniques that have worked for others. If you're looking for more discussion, interactions and feedback, head inside our Members Feed. That's where the real-time conversations take place.

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  1. Anonymous 4 weeks ago

    Today is day 6 booze free, yay for me! But holy hecker… the stress, anxiety and negative self-talk when 5pm rolls around, and I’m on holidays. When I start back on Monday, my drive home might be interesting. Especially if my car autopilots to the bottle store. I’m scared, anxious, fearful, worried and downright terrified. But what I haven’t been for 3 of the past six days is foggy, confused, tearful, shameful or full of guilt. The first 3 days were full of these emotions and it wasn’t pretty. The other emotion I feel is hopeful, albeit slightly, I hope this feeling increases. 2023 has to be different, I counting on me to stay steadfast, which probably scares me the most. Beer’o’clock allowed me (for years) to reward my stressful work life and life in general, Monday will be interesting 🤞

  2. Bernie1955 3 months ago

    How do you even start to give up I drink about 2.5 bottles of wine a day, and everything I’ve read online says not to go cold turkey.
    I don’t want to go on the on/off drinking merry-go-round if I can help it. A dream perhaps but I want to set myself up for success, not failer.

    • maguire 3 months ago

      Have a course of home detox, which can be arranged by your GP for free. You only pay $10.00 for the meds.

      To my knowledge it has not been possible to quit by myself. Like you I have always been a 2.5 bottles red wine nightly drinker.

  3. Piperpip 4 months ago

    Excellent thank you

  4. Frances 4 months ago

    I got to Day 3 and collapsed. I have been a binge drinker for years. I can go approx 5 days without and then when I start I can’t stop. After the first bottle of wine it is all down hill from there. Black outs, wetting the bed. Calling, messaging people in the night. All the ugliness.
    It’s horrific because I’m a pretty timid person usually.

  5. apol 4 months ago

    Hi new here!
    Day 2 and already fighting off the “do it” in my head. Determined to stop. Wish me luck! And thanks for all the comments already read.

  6. Patty 4 months ago

    Hi all – this is my first time on this sight – totally feel all of your comments – and realize that I need help! yes the self-loathing in the morning, but I totally look forward to 4:00 when I can chill out. I just got blood work results today and see that my wine drinking is affecting my health, but I don’t want to lose the relaxing feeling from my 4:00 glass of red, which is followed by my 5:00 glass and my 6:00 glass, and my 7:30 glass. I have a stressful job -It was awesome to find this site – I feel like I am not alone! I am hoping that the more I read and share – I will find the strength to help myself find better ways to heal.

  7. RubyBuddha 5 months ago

    Tips please on managing wine o clock when your partner still drinks and there is a supply of wine in the house.

    • IJmpje 4 weeks ago

      Hi Ruby, best is to be proud of your not drinking. My husband also drinks everyday, same time, although it is getting earlier now he is also retired. We even have created our own pub in the shed, complete with dartboard and homebrew. Always a supply of wine available for after the beer session.
      I use to drink 1 to 2 bottles of wine a day, pass out and still function highly.
      So what do I do to help myself? I do have 0%alcohol beer at times, just to have that bottle in my hand like the other.
      I make a small plunger of coffee and take that to the bar and drink it out of a small nice cup.
      Sometimes I drink a Mule. Sodawater, gingerbeer, lemon and ginger, fresh mint and crushed ice.
      On good days I just love water.
      When I am not at home I dont even think about drinking at the end of the day, but when I am home with my husband I get reminded everyday that I don’t drink alcohol anymore and you what? I am so proud of myself.
      Hope you are still sober too

      • Nugget 3 weeks ago

        well done you on not drinking while your hubby does. And thanks for that “Mule” drink idea. Like you I still functioned very well, but 2-3 bottles a day isn’t good for me.

  8. gidget2022 8 months ago

    Feeling glum when I should be feeling excited with my decision. Crap headache and low mood.
    Managed to avoid wine at a birthday celebration yesterday, I actually stood by the counter and stared at the bottles, wanting to pour a glass so badly. Felt like I was missing out on all the fun.

  9. 10 months ago

    New here, hello 😊
    Ive been a daily 5oclock wine consumer for many years and was led to believe it was normal and even good for my health. But now I find that after two glasses of wine, I know longer remember the rest of the evening- that terrifies me.
    No alcohol for two weeks now and a persistent low level constant headache,… is this a common symptom?

  10. tersey 10 months ago

    Every time you make it thru wine o’clock is a win, and one day closer to an AF life! I am the same. Day 54 today, but pretty retain if I pick up 🍷 today it will be a long time before I go even a few days. Sigh! Just not in me to moderate

    • Grace09 9 months ago

      Hearing you re the ‘inability to moderate’ accepting that you are an ‘all or nothing’ type person is not easy. Day 54 is AWESOME!! Too many days stacked up to look back @tersey. Keep on truckin’

      • Debs 5 months ago

        Gosh, this was like reading about myself! 🙂

  11. upche8544W1955 10 months ago

    It means so much to me to hear so many stories like mine—creeping up to a bottle of wine a night, waking up in the wee hours and the next morning full self-loathing and resolve, failing that resolve at 2 p.m., and feeling like I was the only one and all alone in this. Well, I made it through wine o’clock today. Let’s see what happens next week. I don’t want to live like this anymore

    • Jacqui74 7 months ago

      You have described exactly my story……………Ugh the guilt and self loathing. So sick and tired of the constant battle in my head.

      • ambivalent 4 weeks ago

        How do you know if you are able to minimize or if you just need to quit?

    • Sober22 8 months ago

      Ugh….the self loathing is the WORST!

  12. True 10 months ago

    These posts are really helpful. I didn’t get through wine o’clock on day 1. I had 3 before I started to feel really nauseous . Quickly cooked dinner and that stopped me from having another 6 or 7.
    I will read the wine o’clock blogs earlier tomorrow and eat before my willpower collapses

    • Liz 3 months ago

      Remember HALT – Never let yourself get Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. Identify the things that self-soothe you, eating early, taking a walk, bath, sitting quietly with mediative music, yoga, going to bed early with a good book! Do whatever you feel (drill down to find it!) you need to do to get through those moments. They do pass, and it does get easier! It is NOT selfish to take this time to self-care, it is vital you do! And read, and read, and talk to trusted person, family and friends! You are not alone

  13. leelee69 10 months ago

    I rwlly need stop drinking I dont drink every night but when I do I binge and become very unwell

  14. kelli1977 10 months ago

    I would like to stop thinking about alcohol and stop buying it from the supermarket

    • Anonymous 2 months ago

      me too

  15. kelli1977 10 months ago

    I have a hard time not drinking after work, I will drive to the supermarket and buy a bottle of bubbly. I think about drinking from 11am onwards

  16. LucyLou563 10 months ago

    For me ,Day 2 into my second attempt at Sober Curiosity… Making dinner early helps me, I don’t feel like drinking when I have had dinner and I also make myself a Super Spicy Tomato juice with Tabasco and the all the garnish (like what you get in a restaurant minus the vodka of course) so its like a mini meal in itself LOL..

  17. Buggles 11 months ago

    I struggle from 2pm until dinner. As thankfully once I eat dinner I don’t feel like drinking. So I pre prepare dinner, have it earlier. And at 2pm when wine witch starts I watch intervention stories on YouTube and sleep. When I’m really bad I have a zero alcohol beer, but not every day as I’m aware I need to break that cycle.
    Hope this helps x

  18. Rymkervic 12 months ago

    Just looking for some advice. I am on holiday just now and 5th day off drink. Yippee!!

    But when l return l have someone in my house who will NOT like that the drinking has stopped and he will try to get me to drink again (l am not in a relationship with this person but am stuck living with him till Sept) he drinks red ‘sensibly?’ if anyone can drink poison sensibly. But when l tried to stop before he would leave a bottle open in the kitchen in full view (deliberately) to ‘breath.’ And just let it sit there for hours. Also his comments on the taste of the latest bottle became regular – didn’t take long before l caved and had a glass, which is exactly what he wanted.

    This time l am not telling him l have stopped, but it will not take long before he notices – so advice please on how to handle someone who enjoys other people failing – speaking to him is not worth it, that really would not work, it would just build his ego.

    For the next week l can fool him by opening my last four bottles in the house and filling up a glass and then pouring it down the sink behind his back. But after that, with no bottles in the recycling he will notice and start up his annoying behaviour again.

    Any advice to this extra challenge? Cheers

    • NEWLIFEKA 9 months ago

      The day that I realised I’m potentially going to lose friends if I stop drinking and excepted that fact is the day things changed for me. I will not be around people like that. I’ve had to cut people out of my life because of their attitude toward my old drinking habits. One in particular that said he thought I was weak for becoming an alcoholic. When I stopped drinking I would not have alcohol in my house at all. People now have to like me for who I am today not the old me who really was a different person & no longer exists. I now choose the people who I want around me & believe me it does get better. I’m coming up 3 years sober & have never felt better in my life. It’s hard work but the payoff is extremely worth it so stick with it & tell the detractors to f@ck off!! sorry I can’t put it any other way.

    • SoberSailing 9 months ago

      This is just awful, I’m so sorry. He seriously notices how many bottles you put in recycling?? I guess my idea of grape juice in your wine glass wouldn’t work then…I hope your situation improves, stay strong!

    • 2BSBR 10 months ago

      Gosh, what a delimna to be in. Can your living situation mot change before September?

  19. princesspeach20769 12 months ago

    Honestly, I love wine because it makes me forget everything for a bit. I’m just so sick of not being able to stop…. I hate myself even as I’m pouring the last glass. Shaking it to make sure I get every last drop out… I can barely remember anyway. I feel so guilty and sick the next day. It used to be every single night… but now is still once a week or so. Why do I go buy the wine? It’s like an impulse and I decide it’s worth it in the moment. It isnt.. countless opportunities missed, too hungover to get out of bed. Disrespect to my friends and their time.. stealing basically. I will drink all of my roommates alcohol if I run out of wine before I pass out. At that point I’ll drink anything. Why??

  20. Valerie 1 year ago

    Lorna, You sound exactly like me. I am new here too. I am 10 day sober for Dry January. I didn’t quite make it through the first week. But been sober since Jan 8. Did okay at first. Today was terrible. Depression, irritability, just didn’t feel right…really wanted a drink. Tried to stay busy. Chamomile tea, l-theanine, hops helped calm the storm. Hope tomorrow is better

  21. LornaFitz 1 year ago

    Hi. I’m new here. I’m 9 days into Dry January and I have never been this long without a drink in the last 35 years. I was OK to start but I’m now depressed (long term issue) sleeping badly, have brain fog and my emotions are churning. I’m hoping to get through it.

    • kevin29 1 year ago

      Just reading this now and wondering how you are doing. I’m on Day 5 and while my mind is OK, I’m achy like I’m sick. I know it’s withdrawal. I’ve been down this road before. It’s my body telling me a drink or two will make me feel better. While it probably would in the instant, it would put me right back into the storm. I have to ride this out to feel good on my own terms and let my body adjust. It will if I let it. Hope you are feeling better.

    • carolynjulia 1 year ago

      Wow. Well done you!! You will get through it – what you are experiencing is very normal.
      There are some good resources you could hook into to keep that motivation up – try The Naked Mind by Annie Grace. I have managed to completely stop drinking for a year after drinking at least a bottle of wine every night for 25 years, and it was so effortless in the end. I NEVER expected it to be, but I stumbled onto Annie Grance’s Alcohol Experiment on the internet and have not looked back.

      • Homeandaway 12 months ago

        Hi, I just looked at the naked experiment, do we just have to dive in without really knowing what it is? Im a bit worried it might need a lot of time and next minute I feel bad for not doing it! Thanks in advance 🙂

  22. healthyishnix 1 year ago

    I joined this site quite a while back with the same stories as all of you. Needless to say, the months I have been absent means I haven’t succeeded either and wine o’clock has definitely been my nemesis. I’m not a type A personality so am not into challenges like dry January or preparing for a marathon and have read a few “how to quit” books but they are all based around challenges and milestones which I just can’t seem to relate to. OR. I always find a reason for a drink once wine o’clock’s hands reach 6pm. Yet, like all of you the feelings of embarrassment, guilt, frustration and self-loathing consumes me…it’s truly an addiction. Thanks to suggestions from some of you I tried no wine in the house (went and bought some anyway), self-control (can’t). Even the guilt and saying stuff I regretted in front of my teenage son is shockingly not enough (if I remembered what I actually said the next morning). I know all the reasons not to yet could never muster the day 1. New habits/hobbies just don’t work for me. Stick me in the kitchen, I become the bottle’s slave. Until…

    One week ago, I tried alcohol-free/removed wine (Edenvale Chardonnay) and for the first time in years of drinking every single night (a bottle), I have found some kind of solution. I realised that my issue is the “ceremony” of opening the fridge, opening that bottle, pouring into the glass and taking the first sip (glug, whole glass). I describe AF wine as “75% there” – the missing 25% includes the texture, body and the buzz. But it’s the buzz that I don’t want because it turns to fuzz then wor(st)zz! It’s not the same buzzy pleasure of a glass of wine and the first 2 nights I wanted the real stuff but finally the feeling of pride and the feeling that a glass of “wine” was in my hand seemed to help.

    So its only been a week and I know there are symptoms to come and I fear whether I can keep going but this really is the first time I feel a eureka with my habit. I’ve never been able to say “yasss, it’s day 2!!” and now I am on day 7. Thought I would share in case this helps one person out there.😊

    PS – I did find “Quit Like a Woman” by Holly Whitaker an interesting read. Might be useful/interesting for all genders!

    • quoteme 4 months ago

      I’m really proud of you even though we haven’t met. I hear you! I truly hope you find the strength.

    • Katie444 1 year ago

      I love your line – the buzz turns into fuzz – that says it all really. And doesn’t the fuzz come along quickly? I agree with you that it’s all about the ritual of the glass in hand. I’m pouring myself a glass of ginger beer and I’m going to enjoy it without worrying about forgetting things and turning into a total prat. Good luck!

    • southerngirl 1 year ago

      Thanks for sharing this tip. Mrs D also made a similar comment on RNZ this past week when a radio host commented on the great taste of AF without the buzz. As she wisely pointed out, the buzz is the alcohol and that’s the addictive part. Wine o’clock is also my nemisis so am off to find some AF wine as AF sodas aren’t doing it for me and I can not stop at one glass either so moderation seems unlikely. Not sure why I used ther word seems given the evidence – IS unlikley.

  23. Bex 1 year ago

    6 weeks sober, the longest time without a drink in 40+ years. A ‘social binge drinker’, a few drinks during the week then all out at the weekend. My body was handling it or so I thought. The last few years I have progressed from 2-3 bottles of Pinot Gris a week to 4,5,6 and 7. Binges then started to end in the occasional blackout and mysterious injuries I couldn’t explain. Hangovers got worse and worse, I was always saying ‘I won’t do that again’ but I did. Again and again. Then I started, about a year ago, waking up in the early hours with a racing, pounding heart. The most awful feeling, and out of control. Towards the end of October this year,I decided to have some ‘time off’. Lasted four days and then felt I needed a reward so drank a bottle of wine. Woke again with the pounding heart. Finally decided I didn’t want to feel like that anymore and haven’t had anything to drink since. It has been hard, wine o’clock is very tricky. If I can get through about 4.30-6pm,I am usually good for the evening. About five days in was the worst day, I was roaming the house yelling, trying to stop myself going to the shop to buy wine. I knew if I did it was all over rover. I called my best friend in Australia and cried on the phone to her for an hour, she got me through it. It has got easier since then. Every time i think a drink would be nice I ask myself, do you want to wake up at 2am with a pounding heart? So far the answer has been no. I can’t guarantee this is for ever, so I take it day by day, sometimes hour by hour, sometimes it’s minutes – if I don’t get a drink in the next ten minutes I’m doing ok. Christmas will be interesting, my family are big drinkers. Mum is 93 and tucks away a good portion of wine in an evening. My sister seems to be able to have one or two glasses and stop. I can’t. If I open a bottle of Pinot Gris, I have to get to the bottom of it. Funnily enough, I can stop at one red wine. But it is PG I am addicted to, and if I start on red I will switch to PG. also I know alcohol is a toxin. I gave up smoking 20 years ago, so I know I need to stop putting this toxin in my body as well.
    Wow, that got a bit long! Stay strong, talk to a bestie who gets you, prepare for tricky occasions or make an excuse and don’t go. It’s your body, your life, take control xx

    • Helena123456 4 weeks ago

      I know it’s such a vicious circle.. waking up guilt, headache, feeling rubbish .. questioning why I had to drink so much and get to 5pm and staring at the wine fridge.. it’s tough x

    • Mel 12 months ago

      I get the pounding racing heart too, it scares me.

      • Wendy 7 months ago

        My heart pounds too. Alcohol definitely damages the heart. That should be enough to make me stop but then I cave in and it’s back to the evil cycle of drinking and being disgusted at myself for my weakness. UGG. I’m trying again. Today is day 2

    • michelle clotworthy 1 year ago

      Hi Bex.
      I feel exactly the same . I can’t stop at one, and mine is SB. Sometimes I can but rarely, then yes the wake up,call,at 2 am, heart racing, hot sweats.
      I really need help to stop, it’s the 4 pm to 6 pm time slot that’s awful. I live on my own, so this doesn’t help.
      If I had a close contact or sponsor I think this might help,
      MC… hammered ☺️

      • southerngirl 1 year ago

        SB is my poison too. Living with someone deosn’t always make stopping any easier. I’ve been telling hubbhy the night sweats are menopause-related and I’m such a high functioning, excellent alcoholic, he believes me. The best advice I’ve had about wine o’clock is playing it forward – so picture yourself at 4-6pm, sweating, guilty (I panic about getting cancer), lonely, scared and it might be enough to make you reconsider the SB. Maybe? I’m a work in progress on this but also feel like this forum could be a great place for you to not feel so alone. Maybe log in at wine o-clock time? It’s a safer rabbit hole to get lost in – and you might even find yourself in the process. Take care.

  24. MODdy 1 year ago

    It’s my birthday and I’m not having a drink. The only other times this has occurred is when I was pregnant with both my children. I do dry July every year to basically prove to my husband that I don’t have to drink (and then be 1-1 1/2 bottles of chardonnay a night) and this year I continued to 107 days before having a few bevvies after work one PM. I had never really had hangovers before so the hangover from this put me back on the wagon… who TF wants to feel like that! It took me nearly 2 months to be able to sleep properly but now i sleep better than ever before. I have gotten drunk one other time sinece that first time and had a few ‘one and dones’ but have also discovered 0% beer because, for me, I like the taste 🙂 so have been doing a discovery of the 0% range out there. I’m not perfect but I am appreciating sobriety more and more.

  25. Sara Coopey 1 year ago

    I am the same. I have been drinking every night for the last twenty years and I really don’t want to do it anymore. It started when I was having health issues that eventually led to me having a hysterectomy. With two small children it was the only way to cope. Now I feel tired all the time. I wake up in the night and that’s when I start berating myself and feeling guilty and swearing I won’t do it anymore. I can have anywhere between 3 – 5 bottles of wine a week. Lately it’s been the latter. I vow I am only going to have one glass but before I know it the whole bottle is gone and I feel really guilty and ashamed. Wine o’clock is the worst .

    • 4mydillyboy 1 year ago

      Hi Sara, I just joined 10 minutes ago. I see your post is 2 days old so thought I would connect with you. Like you I’m at the 1 to 2 bottles a day. I was sober from 25th April to 30 July this year and my life completely changed. I’ve relapsed back to at least 1 bottle a day. Hence I came here looking to connect with someone in the same boat as me that I could go on the hopefully new sober journey with.

      • TiMo 12 months ago

        How are you getting on? I saw you hadn’t had any replies so far. I’ve only just joined and am also hoping for connections to help me in my journey that, unlike lots of other people on the site, I haven’t yet got enough confidence to believe in because I’ve failed in earlier attempts. But I AM here because I DO want to get further forward than I ever have before. Hope you’re doing ok

  26. Debsinthegarden 1 year ago

    My wine o clock success is currently hit and miss. I find if I go for a walk and listen to a sober podcast it helps. Also reading avidly. Currently reading Mindfullness-how to find peace in a frantic world. You can’t drink while reading, right? It helps if I’ve prepped dinner beforehand as its when I’m cooking I reach for the wine.

    • Shay 6 months ago

      any suggestions on podcasts?

    • Komninos 1 year ago

      Agree, reading and drinking don’t tend to go together for me either! Hear what you’re saying about prepping dinner, same here… good luck and thanks for sharing the tips 🙂

  27. Bizzybee 1 year ago

    Day Three and I feel fine. I typically drink two glasses of Chardonnay a night. I’m the type that buys one very good bottle of wine and allows myself to drink to the label one night and then I can finish the bottle the next night.

    What I am afraid of struggling with is the weekends: My husband and I go to the same three or four restaurants because with Covid, we prefer to sit outside, and by the time I sit down, the sweet wait staff who know us because we are regulars, already have what they call “the usual” — a chardonnay for me and a Blue Moon for my husband. I’m afraid to go out to dinner now because not sure what to say….I’m going to have to run inside and grab someone to tell them to bring me sparkling water and lime! It’s the social outings that have me a little nervous.

  28. Jenfer 1 year ago

    Is it realistic of me to cut out alcohol (wine) altogether? I’ve been drinking 12 bottles of wine a week for years, always felt I could control it and that it was just a habit I couldn’t break. After having an incident at home when I was sober where I got a pain in my chest and broken into a cold sweat and felt lethargic for around 40 mins I was told by my doctor to go straight to hospital for an ECG and bloods.
    I got told at the hospital after the results that although the ECG was clear my bloods showed up some abnormalities in my liver function. I got asked how much I drank I could only admit to 3 bottles a week and was told that is a lot and I need to cut down. Last night I didn’t drink. Today I feel bad, guilty for abusing my body and rubbish from the detox.
    Dreading the hurdle of wine o’clock later

    • Komninos 1 year ago

      That’s hard to contemplate such a change eh? I know when I first tried to avoid drinking anything, it felt like the wheels were coming off!! One thing I would encourage you to try is a dedicated week with no alcohol – do whatever it takes to get that first week under your belt. Make sure you eat a lot, I found this helped when I first managed a whole week off booze – helped with the urges and I tended to wake feeling better too. Stitching together runs of sobriety, even if patchy, gives us some stable new ground to work from. I reckon you can do it. Keep posting here, this site is loaded with fantastic people and resources 🙂

  29. MissCP 1 year ago

    I’m feeling ashamed, my drinking is making me feel foggy every day, tired all the time and I wake up every morning wanting to stop, but every day I buy another bottle. I did 100 days sober earlier this year, I felt amazing and always do, but I feel a bit our of control with it at the moment. Today is going to be my Day 1, I want to wKe up feeling energised and happy 🙂

    • Komninos 1 year ago

      Good stuff! 100 days is amazing. Now you know what it feels like, and you have something to aim for again 🙂

  30. sweetwaters 1 year ago

    Well made 3 days then was offered a wine taste and just one glass I was surprised I just had the one and I left. Then the weekend brought trouble as I went on my first weekend off since July and tried to stay busy with all the grandkids however after dinner the kids were having a few beers and wine and I ended up drinking the norm and fell asleep. I guess ups and downs back to the drawing board .. start again.. I can say I did feel so much better after al.ost 4 days sober

  31. MamaNettie 1 year ago

    If I eat instead of drink the craving will usually stop

  32. sweetwaters 1 year ago

    Day 1 is almost every morning. I wake up feeling guilty and out of control. Iv changed to light wines but then ill just drink more. A bottle and a half.most nights. I hate the way I feel. I want to live alcohol free but come 5pm every night I find a reason to drink. It makes me sad foggy and depressed.. I want to stop but I feel iv lost the power to do so.. I need help

    • Jean9 1 year ago

      Hi sweet water reading your comment is something I could of written myself as well, im also on my day 1 today and yep it’s that 5pm thing. Im going to put a pod cast on about that time so hopefully that helps me. Good luck with your day 1 😊

  33. Froufrou 1 year ago

    I tackled wine o’clock in Dry July by having a luxurious shower to mark the end of the day. So relaxing!

    • Komninos 1 year ago

      Love it! Going to try it….

  34. MRD4VE 1 year ago

    Day 1 for me. A little anxious, but lets do this

    • acld88 1 year ago

      Same here, although I’m still not sure I want to give up entirely… But definitely want to stop drinking alone, that’s a good start right?

      • Jenfer 1 year ago

        How did you get on? Have you had occasional drinks or totally abstained? I’d like to have some wine at the weekends but be alcohol free during the week

  35. Seaneym 1 year ago

    Day 1 for me. I’m 32 years and struggled with alcohol since I was a kid. Things started getting worse from 16 untill now. My health, money and physical condition is starting to really take a toll. I just want out of this addiction.

  36. sobermama1986 1 year ago

    I have an event coming up this weekend and I’m newly sober- I haven’t told anyone except my husband. He’ll be drinking and I won’t and it’s friends we used to drink with. I’m feeling really anxious about it.

    • MamaNettie 1 year ago

      What I’ve learned is that no one really cares if you drink or not. If they ask, say you’re on a diet or something.

    • rosemaree 1 year ago

      Get a non alcoholic drink as soon as you get there, and if anybody does ask, then tell them you’re on antibiotics. It’s nobody else’s business.

  37. missyb 2 years ago

    Yesterday was my first outing to a bar sober. Being the designated driver was an interesting car ride. I’m almost 230 days clean. The booze and bar surprisingly was not a trigger. I think a club soda should not be 3.00!!

  38. Audi-girl 2 years ago

    I went out the other night with a group of friends, they were all drinking and I have told them I’m doing dry July( great cover ) After a couple of sparking waters I started getting pretty bored with my drink and wanted something else ( mock tail ) everything was fruit juiced based and full of sugar .. I’m after Some suggestions which aren’t full of sugars or cream ..
    I ordered a virgin margarita and everyone laughed and said a glass of salt will probably turn up … lol

  39. Dazza 2 years ago

    Day one fingers crossed

  40. Orient 2 years ago

    Like to manage my alcohol better. Easy to finish work and grab a bottle for a stress release rather than doing something i loved which was exercise.

  41. Atawhai 2 years ago

    Pam’s flavoured sparkling water is good. Four flavours. $1.29 for 1litre bottles. At New World and Pak’n’Save. Zero calories.
    Gives cold, bubbly feelings to palate, and fills the stomach. I use one at home most evenings
    I also buy a single one as soon as I arrive at the supermarket, keep the receipt, and drink it quickly on the way round, so that by the time I reach the wine and beer section, my cravings have lessened.

  42. Suzy 2 years ago

    Would love to become sober. This is day one. I drink 1. 1/2 to 2 bottles every other night. I hate how I feel. So disappointed in my. I wish I could drink a glass or two and stop. But apparently that is impossible for me.

    • Esty 1 year ago

      How’s it going Suzy? I’ve had so many Day 1s and this is another. Your wine drinking habits resonate with me. I used to able to stop but not anymore.

    • Bindy 2 years ago

      Im exactly the same. I was even put on Antabuse and it did stop me for a month. But I missed drinking so I stopped taking it

    • NickCaveFan 2 years ago

      Hi Suzy. You and I have started the same day! My first 24 hours is just about up. We can do this!!!

  43. Maggie73 2 years ago

    Hi Rhita and welcome. The anxiety is terrible isn’t it? I too have been suffering more and more with that. I’ve been a heavy drinker off and on for years. I don’t like to admit that and it’s hard to see it written out, but it’s true. You are on the right track. Be gentle and kind with yourself. I will be thinking of you x

  44. Rhita 2 years ago

    Hiya everyone … I’m new here! Thank you to all the people who have welcomed me. Sorry it’s taken me some time to actually post here because I couldn’t work it out 😂

    So here is my drinking background. I’m currently 28 years old. Started drinking every night (a bottle and a half a of wine) at the age of 18 until I was around 20. Cut that down to ONLY weekends … about the same amount. A year later it was upped again to every night for around a year. (A bottle and a half of wine) Then I cut back down to only weekends for about another year. Fell pregnant with my son .. didn’t drink at all for 9 months. Once he was born I started drinking every night again around 2 bottles of wine for about 5 months. Decided I needed to cut down so for the past 2 and a half years or so it’s been weekends. (Half a bottle of JD honey on a Saturday and 2 glasses of wine – half – a bottle of wine on a Sunday) I also fell pregnant in that 2 and a half years but unfortunately miscarried so I wasn’t drinking for 6-7 weeks. I also went for about a month in lockdown drinking every night. The last few weeks my anxiety has been AWFUL. So I’ve been drinking a bottle – a bottle and half of wine every night which needs to stop. However, I am so worried I won’t sleep then won’t be able to function. But then If I DO drink and DO sleep i then worry about my liver. I’m in such a vicious cycle. I don’t quite know what to do. I’ve got my first CBT appointment today because I wanna break this anxiety once and for all! Thank you for reading.

  45. Atawhai 2 years ago


    Do you know the quote, “Practise the Pause”, by Lori Deschene?

    I tried to attach it, but could not. You may have to Google it.

    I use it when i have a craving. The 5 o’clock craving.

    I have it written on my fridge door. When I come in, read it, and pour myself a large glass of cold skim milk.

    The cold feels great on my palate, and in my throat. I repeat is as often as I need, maybe one litre or even two litres.

    While drinking I Practise the Pause. I use it to interrupt the automatic reflex of pouring a wine, and swilling the first glass quickly.

    It works most times. I sometimes need other supports too, but more of that later.

    Kia Kaha (stay strong!)

  46. Jason P 2 years ago


    I’m a tall fit white male in my late 40’s. Today is day 14 of me without any booze. I’ve been an evening drinker for 20+ years. Vodka and Monster to start off the evening leading into gin and tonics to finish myself off. So far I have lost 5 pounds and feel much better. Sleeping has been rough, but last night I finally slept much better. My dreams have been very vivid and crazy! Too bad I couldn’t enjoy any popcorn along with it. Weekends I have craved drinking, but just let it pass by. During these thoughts I tell myself that living for my wife and daughter are far more important then having any alcohol in my body. I have recently got to the point that in my thoughts I am poisoning myself. Annual doctor visits have told me I am on the cusp of high blood pressure. Blood tests I don’t feel are ever accurate as I always drank the night before them. I am very aware my liver has been under siege and needs repair. I want to change all these results. I do cardio 4-5 times a week and my max heart rate since no booze has dropped by 10 points. I can already feel the freshness in the morning and more energy during my workouts. My goal is to stay dry for the next year. This is my second attempt at doing this. My prior attempt was 8-10 years ago and I made it four months. I feel this time I am really ready to do it on my own. I’ve done it before and am off and rolling.

  47. asparagus 2 years ago

    I’m on day 8 and so far feeling really positive and confident. Had a friend over for dinner last night. She’s a big drinker and we usually get far too drunk together. I warned her in advance that I wasn’t drinking and bought some nice alcohol-free drinks that I poured into a nice glass with ice while she drank wine. I’m lucky that she was really supportive and even bought me a non-alcoholic bottle too! I think telling people in advance really helps as you are then accountable.

    • NickCaveFan 2 years ago

      That’s so great! Love it. Keep up the good work.

    • Liz 2 years ago

      Great you have such an unerstanding friend! Just wondering what AF drinks you choose? Im getting tired of juices.

      • Mags01 1 year ago

        I recently bought a bottle of AF Giesen Sauvignon blanc – it tasted ok and did the job – of keeping me off the wine!

        They also do a Pinot Gris which I have in the fridge and “Plus and Minus” also do a AF Pinot Noir which I have not tried yet.

        Available at Farro. They also do a AF Gin and tonic which isn’t too bad either with plenty of ice and lime!

  48. Steph 2 years ago

    Wine o’clock day 1. Off for a walk

    • Paulene 2 years ago

      Good on you.
      My first day. I’m going for a walk after work.

  49. sadie123 2 years ago

    Day one is drawing to a close and I am so glad I made it.
    I was grumpy at my family today and I could 100% see that’s the alcohol -the hangovers made me irritable and it really makes my thoughts so negative – I know that I’ll feel a bit better tomorrow because I wont wake up hungover tomorrow and then better again the next day and my patience and compassion for others will return the ability to enjoy nice simple things in life won’t be ruined by being hungover or drunk .
    I could see really clearly i the wee hours of this morning that I am at a crossroads where my life can either get worse because my drinking will only get worse or my life can get better if I swap alcohol for sober spiritual living – I just really hope I can get some sober time up this time and not give in.

    I decided at first to tell people I am having a break from alcohol for my eczema to make it go away as I’m scared they wont hang out with me if they think Im never drinking again – but once I feel stronger I can hopefully tell them I have chosen to never drink again.

    • Krystal 2 years ago

      Huh.. interesting comment re. Eczema. Mine flares up when I am indulging on the regular. Another bonus to giving up the grapes! On another note, I too am at a cross roads. Given that your post was a couple of months ago, I hope your journey is going well.

      • Maggie73 2 years ago

        Hi Krystal, I too suffer from terrible eczema when I drink too much. I’m suffering terribly at the moment. It’s even on my eyelids. Only day 1 for me. All the best to you on your journey.

  50. Lancelot 2 years ago

    Hi, I’m also new here and am on Day 19 and my wine o clock treat is a refreshing 50/50 mix of apple juice and sparkling water with lots of ice. I first discovered this in Austria and Germany where it is very popular and is known as Apfelschorle. Hits the spot!

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