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Licensed by NZ Drug Foundation under Creative Commons 4.0 2024. Built by Bamboo Creative and powered by Flywheel.
My story is no different than the next. Forever falling off the wagon. The demon I let get to me every time.
Me too. I have nothing for two, three, four days (even though there is plenty in the house) then on Friday night, oooh what a week, I need a treat ! And a bottle of Pinot Gris later…..
Sometimes I feel it would be good to have someone that is going through the same thing to give a call or txt at that time you can swing either way. I find myself going up the road to get a bottle and on the way I am trying like hell to talk myself out of it but the demon always says tomorrow, have a few tonight and start again tomorrow. Disappointing given I have done it before and lasted 8 months.
8 months is awesome! I haven’t lasted more then two weeks for the last probably 30 years.
seven o’clock isn’t wine o’clock and coincidentally the urge comes like clockwork
My demon is strong and my commitment crumbles when he comes out
Squirt lime wedge. Can’t live without it!
Nature abhors a vacuum, so after eliminating one thing (the drinking/drugging) you need to replace it with something else. Get away from the place you used to drink, whether its home or the bar. Go to the library. Take a walk. Call a sober friend. Watch the comedy channel. Read sobriety blogs! Manicure your nails. Drive to the mall. Experiment with a fancy mocktail. Eat dinner early and go to bed early. Shampoo the dog. Write in your journal. Pull weeds. Color. Put together a puzzle. Play your favorite music and dance. Sing along! Set a timer for 15 minutes and then go clean something. Urges last shorter than you think. Keep trying new ideas until something works!
Thanks, these are all good suggestions
I am only on Day 6, however, I have to say I have enjoyed a can of club soda to sip on. It has a bit of bite to me and not much flavor, so I can sip it slowly. That has been helpful to me.
Well done. I’m 25 days and Soda, lemon and ice has been great for me around 5pm. I’m finding after one slow class I get on with my evening alcohol free
Hi ladyhawke
I hear you this me every night. Tonight is another day 1 after so many failures. They say u have to really want to give up wine. I do but the willpower gets weaken at wine o’clock.
Finding your comments about avoiding staying hungry after work helpful. Today i managed to stay drink free. (Once eaten it is not so difficult)
I have a new job, my best opportunity so far in life and i am really hoping not to mess it up. (Drinking has definetely effected my last 2 jobs which were not as great and stressful)
I have visited a therapist and taking a small dose of antidipressant each day now.
Hoping to stay sober and find excitment in other forms….
Sometimes deep breathing sometimes a huge chocolate milkshake. There are nights I feel like being healthy and active like hitting a yoga class and other nights just journaling or watching t.v.
25 days alcohol free and getting better at paying attention to my tendency to stuff emotions with wine and now with food, but am taking it easy and trying to let some time pass!!
Same for me, once I have eaten my dinner I am over it. I got into the habit of having dinner ready in the fridge for when I get home. Just microwave it and I am good to go. It’s a bit of work but so worth it.
I think you have something here. I have always found that eating dinner early helps with the cravings. It kind of interrupts the pattern. My husband is working today so I think I’ll take the time and prepare a few meals to have already cooked. That way when he starts in with the beer at 3:00 I can just eat an early supper and be done with it.
Yussssss! Only gets better. With a few breathing and letting it pass moments in between, it’s so worth it though. Happy sober day 🙂
Once you are through the first night it gets alot easier. Im on day four after falling into a trap of a bottle of wine a night became a habit
Day 12 here and feel so good….I can see the whites of my eyes!
I’m 22 AF. I’ve felt great every morning that I’ve woke up hangover free! Evenings are the worst for me. I’ve been trying to stay busy. Cooking supper, helping kids with homework, reading, watching tv, cleaning. I’m getting bored though.
I cave every night due to financial
Stress and my old heath insurance owing me thousands of dollars and my ongoing court battle with a narcissistic sociopath intimidating ex. I feel like I’ll lose my sanity until I calm
Down with wine. Anxiety meds mood doctor are strong and don’t touch the panic. My bloodwork was not very good (not terrible) and that hasn’t scared me enough to quit. I drink two bottles of moscato 10% wine over 12 hours. I can’t sleep due to anxiety so I sip wine and work on my o line classes. I never am drunk as I have a police grade breathalyzer (stay about .015). But all that wine still can’t be good. But it’s a crutch.
Alcohol causes insomnia…..
Very hard when driving home – I tell myself I’ve done a good job and I deserve a drink and then it begins…
The drive home is difficult for me too at day 10. On the way home yesterday, after an especially stressful day, I felt this sudden urge out of nowhere while sitting at a stop light. I thought to myself, “Where did that come from?” It was like a flutter in my stomach, a hunger. Noticing and analyzing this feeling helped me shake it.
I go through a similar thing. That drive home…I’ll be telling myself okay…not gonna drink tonight…one night, you can do it…not tonight. Sure enough I swing in and get a box of wine and now, I’m set for the next couple days. If I’m full…I’m way less likely to drink. I always start before I eat…get that quick easy buzz then thrown in the towel as the evening rolls along, glass after glass finally waking up pissed at myself telling myself…okay, this is going to stop…stop today. Then…same thing over and over…it hasn’t stopped. 🙁
Omg, i need to do this! Thanks for your post. I am struggling with kicking wine at night. Im tired of waking up PO’d at myself for drinking wine.
Reading lotta books and several other books recommended by her in her books. Refer back to sections in these books at tough times.
I have found eating something at 4pm, which is just before I knock off work helps.
I always struggle when driving home from work, it is the time when I am at my weakest and most likely to stop into the bottle shop or have my addicted personality (Serena) try and convince me I deserve a drink. If I am full in my belly I do not have a desire to drink, ever, which is great for me.
Unsure if this will help anyone else.
After 60 days drinking again. Worst than ever. Like, 4 bottles a day. Can’t stop. Need help.
I totally agree. Full belly…less desire!
At my worst moment I wrote truths about how I am when I drink (now past tense)onto post it notes.
I stuck them on my dresser so that I saw them when I first woke up. I stuck them in the kitchen right where I cooked dinner (where my trigger spot was) I put them in my car…everywhere I could think…bathroom…toilet. ..etc etc.
They said
1 drink is not enough ever for you.
You always speak trash to yourself in the mornings.
It’s just not fun anymore.
You are better than this.
Its only a thought and I can change that.
I don’t like you when you drink.
I want my feelings back as truth.
You get the idea
Xx
Sending hugs 🤗 you can start again.
At my worst moment I wrote truths about how I am when I drink (now past tense)onto post it notes.
I stuck them on my dresser so that I saw them when I first woke up. I stuck them in the kitchen right where I cooked dinner (where my trigger spot was) I put them in my car…everywhere I could think…bathroom…toilet. ..etc etc.
They said
1 drink is not enough ever for you.
You always speak trash to yourself in the mornings.
It’s just not fun anymore.
You are better than this.
Its only a thought and I can change that.
I don’t like you when you drink.
I want my feelings back as truth.
You get the idea
Xx
What is the book called Tiki
By reading telly helpful mindfulness books and going for a walk
How was your experience with the hypnotherapy? Am booking a session myself this week.
First off, not having any temptations in the house is key! Changing up the routine also helps. I used to pour my first after work and then start preparing dinner. I try to do prep in stages – the night before, in the morning before work, so I’m not in the kitchen in that same routine being assailed by the witch!
I always enjoyed having a glass of wine while preparing dinner too! Pouring that first drink after the work day was the transition from work to personal time for me. It’s been a struggle, I admit, but I’ve soldiered through and do what so many of you also do, have a nice mocktail in a fancy glass. I do find I’m always ‘preparing’ for what I’m going to drink! It takes a lot of preparation to stay on the sober road.
It is hard! But like Mrs. D wrote in her book, I just imagine myself going to bed sober and getting a great night sleep.
https://youtu.be/_-NonVtxyAk – Have a laugh
Know what you mean. I’m 64 and have been drinking since teens. So sick of it. Have just done 35 AF days then caved. Very disappointing. Travelling overseas in 3 weeks for 6 weeks and don’t want to mess it all up. It’s such an evil curse. Physical changes when sober are good -sleep better, less bloating so why is it so hard?
why is it always late afternoon??
Yeah, I noticed since I turned 61 that drinking makes me age faster. Now I am 66 and it shows under the my eyes and on my lids the most. Hard to sleep as well. I have to stop with my glasses of wine each night. I did that b/c everyone says how red wine is good for you, and then one glass went to two glasses and now more. Now that I noticed a physical change, that is what made me want to give it up completely.
Looking for ideas to keep me busy
For me waking bright eyed makes for a long day to stay occupied. Open to all ideas to harness positive thoughts and keep myself out of trouble.
Hiya it is bloody hard i have begun my journey of booze free haven’t been too successful keep falling off but I keep coming back because i want to stop boozing every night. I want to feel the feelings of being sober every day and deal with raw emotions that mrs d writes about in her book. I haven’t had the greatest of sleep I’ve only been sober 2 nights. But hey what the hell 2 nights without a hangover the next morning. Bloody bladder working overtime during the night probably cleaning out toxins. Stay strong lets keep the lines of communication open.
You can do it!
Day 1 again oh how many times i have been here. I’m really tired of fighting booze. How come its so hard its only booze and yet i let it control me. I drink i don’t have a good sleep tired all day headache as by 4pm I’m fine again. The cycle begins. Love this site
Organic Kumbucha…fizzy, little to no sugar and kind of looks like beer!
Whatever it takes! I’m on the sparkling water also, in the past when I’ve quit I tried na Beer and honestly that’s not the answer for me, heck I’d drink 12 of them. I’ve made it 6 months before and let it back in but for me it doesn’t change, only gets worse. I’m going to battle this demon, I will win and I hope you do too
Looking for a supportive place while I try again to give up my nightly bottle of wine.
Day one…your stories are inspirational
Whaaha ! ‘ wine o’clock ‘ perfect terminology. I’ve got something to giggle about when I catch myself doing the wine-dream at 5:30. Y’all are great.
So I’m not alone… I have a grand baby coming soon and I want to be there for him
Grand babies are a wonderful joy, and also a stress. Being sober is a good way to be more present for your wee one. Good for you!
Want to give up my nightly wine
Want to give up my nightly wine
Tomorrow will be day 30 for me also. Will be my 4th time quitting. I have to do this to better my life for me and my kids. The ups and downs are manic. Feels so good then 4pm hits then it’s a struggle until late evening
Me too Brad, I gotta do this for my kids as well. I don’t want them to use alcohol to enjoy or get through life like me. Day 30 is awesome. I’m day 22. Try to remember why your doing this and like Mrs d says visualise the next day and how good you’ll feel. I’m tryna do that. But yeah evenings are hard specially when my hubbys having a few and I’m bored and irritated. I drink sparkly grapetise in a new wine glass I bought specially. Drink something similar in a similar vessel see how that works. I hear ya mate!!
Day 1 & I feel ok. Have had 2 weeks off work – had terrible symptoms, could not eat for 8 days, dryretching etc. have never felt so bad. Went to a dr a few days ago & told the truth. I was drinking one to 2 bottles every night & more on the weekend…drinking during the day & also scotch on the rocks. I have been pushing friends away & lost my zest for life. I’m trying all the help I can get & will try hypnotherapy tomorrow. I have a few times to quit before, but this is it.
I hear you, at my worst that is me too – at my best a week or two off but the detox is like having the flu plus exhaustion plus mood swings… hard to understand why we go back for more! I’m trying to attack the beast from all angles…life coach, naturopath, meditation courses, yoga – whatever it takes…I try not to beat myself up when I slip backwards but it’s is hard.
Stay strong and focused. I’m interested to hear how the hypnotherapy goes…
I have a 7 year old! But seriously that works both ways, need a release have wine, need to be present, don’t have wine. I usually have a snack, I know replacing one with another and all that but at least I don’t want a drink. Sunny afternoons are the trigger though. Man what’s with sun and booze? Sun comes out, that already makes you happy vitamin d and all that jazz then we want another hit of the fun buzz. I’m actually looking forward to beating that and just enjoying my soda water with flavoured syrup. Pretty sure I’d choose better music too without the booze in me, at our summer party’s. Win-win I say
I’m afraid of summer too. Good vibes plus alcohol equals better good vibes doesn’t it??….no not really. Fir me it means drinking way too much, my kids seeing me pissed, not being present with them on that fine day, waking up feeling like shit and the biggest fir me is bloody guilt, guilt, regret and you know the rest…isn’t that why we’re tryna stop??…..for me anyway. Well done on your journey….your winning!!!!!!!!! Bring on summer?? Lol…we can do it!!!
It’s a struggle but quite frankly I’m tired of being sick and making an ass out of myself.
I’m using this for my explanation if anyone asks why I’m not drinking. Love it!
Me too! We can do it!