• yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 week ago

    It did when I wrote it.
    Now waaahhhhhhh! : (

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 week ago

    I’m not an expert, but can tell you a bit about me. I drank, I mean DRANK, and not wine, the hard stuff. Every night until I was out with the lights. I stopped cold and didn’t suffer any ill effects. The opposite, with feeling better almost immediately.

    Have you had a good, honest talk with the physician who prescribed the Zyban? Stopping your drinking and starting a new medication at the same time might be problematic. Please take good care of yourself and get good, solid advice from a health professional.

    • JB.OB replied 1 week ago

      thank you, that makes me feel better about stopping cold. I to have been drinking every night until out with the lights but my poison is wine (though I am happy to drink pretty much anything – except rum, ew yuck). Yes, I told him about my drinking (and how my stress and anxiety have increased) hence his prescribing the Zyban. He keeps trying to push different anti-depressants on me and I keep telling him I don’t want them because of the side effects I keep getting from them. I do have another appointment with him tomorrow to readdress things…

    • I agree it’s really important your physician know you have a drinking problem or they may prescribe things they wouldn’t normally. Hang in there!

  • yeswecan posted an update 1 week ago

    One more dry July day. I’m feeling pretty good, but keeping an eye peeled for the sneak attack.

  • yeswecan posted an update 1 week, 2 days ago

    Another hot day here. I’m tired and very uncomfortable from a variety of physical problems. But I did not drink today. So far as possible, I have barricaded myself in the house. Not a lot of tidying up happening, though.

    • You did not drink today and that’s all that matters. One day at a time @yeswecan

    • @yeswecan Sorry you are uncomfortable, I hope you find some relief! You will be so better off not treating it with alcohol though, good work there. The tidying up can happen later. Take care 🙂

    • Great strategy! I hid in my house for almost 2 weeks. Ordered groceries in so I didn’t have to see the liquor aisle. Did very little cleaning. Rest now, you can work later.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 week, 2 days ago

    Sober or bust August

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    Well done, you.
    A real star!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 2 days ago

    That stinks! Hope you are better soon.
    The indignity and discomfort of dental work should not be followed days later with worrying complications. No justice, I say. Are you gargling with warm salt water?

    • yeah and I feel it might be ongoing 🙁 I don’t have a sore throat as such but a very tender node in my neck. Hurts when I lift my chin up/ Very sore to touch. Hoping fucks right off very soon cos it’s bringing me down man lol thanks @yeswecan

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 2 days ago

    Great accomplishment!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 2 days ago

    Day 2 for me, as well.
    Hang in there. We’ve got twice as much sober time as we did yesterday.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Goodie!
    I think peer pressure is great!
    Thanks for joining and motivating me.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Yes, a whole new level of commitment.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Thank you @enzedgirl
    I am certainly not going back, and trying not to be discouraged about the experience. But it’s hard to find any energy for seeking out a new therapist.

    I’ll be here instead.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Okay Frog. Can we do July together?

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Thank you, Ro.
    I had a really great maybe 6 weeks starting mid-January. Great diet, great exercise, sober and feeling good.
    Now I need to find that place once again and NOT. MESS. UP.

  • yeswecan changed their profile picture 2 weeks, 3 days ago

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Well done.
    You rock.
    Thank you for your story.

  • yeswecan posted an update 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Yes we can.
    But no, I am not.

    I’ve got some terribly messed up thinking about myself and it certainly drives my drinking. I’ve had so many day 1s since January and done some major/blackout drinking between them. I can expect no help from my husband, who sees very little of my habit because I hide it well, but twice he has seen it and he was ugly angry mean to me. I started going to a psychiatrist in January who was recommended by my family doctor, and she is enough to drive me to drink more. She insisted that I go on meds, then twice mixed me up with another patient and gave me the wrong advice about them. Each time I knew it wasn’t right and had to stop her and remind her what I was taking. She can’t remember major stories I have told her about my life- like a family suicide. She asks again about that family member and I remind her that he is gone, at which point she asks AGAIN, “Oh really, how did he do it?” even though I have told her the heartbreaking story. She corrects me all the time, even when I am telling a story about a family dynamic that she knows nothing about. She will grab on to a stereotype and then explain to me about that person, and why he/she is a certain way (only child, or eldest child, or youngest child, or Mexican American, or third generation immigrant (?), or salesman by profession) when in fact, that person is not the way she is describing them at all. Last time I met her she started in on what a mess we’re all in and shared that she thinks what the world needs is a major war that will kill off most of the population because many of our problems are from overcrowding. I’ve kept going to her because I thought surely I was missing something and that if I kept trying, I would benefit. But I think I gotta give up on it. Obviously. I’m too depressed to continue with counseling. Thanks for listening. I owe all you good people $300.

    I have been lurking here for a long time and hope that by being more active in posting…[Read more]

    • Hmmm. Sounds like a new psych provider is needed! I’d give you some wise something or other that would help with your relapses, but I’m in same boat as you and daily allowing myself to sink.

    • Oh Yeswecan – your therapist is burned out and maybe having mental health problems. you need to get away and get someone new. i know that is easier said than done but seriously this person is not helping you judging by what you’re saying.

      a lot of people find it helpful to post daily (or as often as feels helpful) for a period of time. somehow it connects you up, keeps you going, helps keep the alcohol at bay.

      • Thank you @enzedgirl
        I am certainly not going back, and trying not to be discouraged about the experience. But it’s hard to find any energy for seeking out a new therapist.

        I’ll be here instead.

    • Omg what a flake! Best therapy I’ve ever had – right here mate. Sick close and let it all hang out. No one gives a shit how ugly it gets we’ve all got skeletons and five cents lol

      • Thank you, Ro.
        I had a really great maybe 6 weeks starting mid-January. Great diet, great exercise, sober and feeling good.
        Now I need to find that place once again and NOT. MESS. UP.

    • Let’s do this together. July is going to be our month of sobriety. You’re in the right place. I will be checking in here everyday to ensure I don’t slip up – look forward to seeing you here too.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    You know that silly saying, “I feel your pain” ?
    Many times you hear it, it really doesn’t mean much. But on this site it resonates. We get it. And we want you to be successful with all out hearts. We understand. Fight this tooth and nail. We are here for you. We believe you can make a better life.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    You earned it and you deserve it (and probably more . . .)
    Enjoy every minute.
    And thank you, to you, for sharing your joy and spreading inspiration.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    This can’t be true. I’ve NEVER been in the popular group!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    Well done, you!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    Libby, you are absolutely correct. You can do it! It may be the hardest thing you ever do, but you have the ability inside you. Alcohol is a terrible enemy, but you can defeat it. We are all behind you. And we understand.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    Thank you for your post.
    It helps me feel hopeful!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    You have uncovered and shared a gem here!
    How much does clutter and mess around us affect our moods? I only recently realized that the piles created by my husband create considerable angst in me. He definitely has hoarder tendencies (which are shared with some of his other family members) and wants to see that he has lots of things. It must make him feel safe. Meanwhile, it frustrates me no end not to have a place I can sit down and have my dinner without moving 20 different items. Now the kids are gone, we are two people living in a four bedroom apartment. It doesn’t seem like that necessitates piling everything you can on the dining room table. Yeah, so I share your revelation of the beauty of order and simplifying. I hope you have a good, reliable place where you can donate the things you cull.
    Good luck with your pantry! Let me know when you get to the medicine cabinet : )

    • Thank you @yeswecan. You make an excellent point. I just lived with that organized chaos for years – like all the piles of alcohol infused clutter that I stored in my head. The farther along I get on this journey, the clearer I’m beginning to see things. I’m amazed at the sense of accomplishment I feel over such a simple act like putting a closet in order. Somehow a bit more in control. I feel like I’m turning another corner – and I can’t wait to discover what’s waiting ahead.

      OOOoooo … the medicine cabinet (briskly rubbing palms together) …. I wonder what’s in there ? ….. Yes. Going to keep this going. Thank you for your encouragement. xox

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    Hi Feee
    Nice to see that you have joined us! Not that I am any kind of expert. Just someone trying to figure things out and then apply those understandings consistently. I’m betting you will get lots of different opinions to this question. Different strategies work for different people. WHat’s normal? At first? No idea. Be sure to be kind to you. If what you need is a Mock Pina Colada and M&Ms right now, then okay. I am personally suspicious of drinks that mimic alcoholic beverages and don’t include any of them in my routine. Some people swear by them. But for me it would be a continuation of the habit at some level, so I chose very different kinds of drinks. Also, I had reached such a low point with my lifestyle that when I finally decided to STOP just STOP a lot of other things went out the window with the alcohol. I began intermittent fasting at exactly the same time, and it worked for me because my schedule allowed it and I was so desperate for the feeling of taking ownership of my body. Morning began with a lovely cup of black coffee, then anything that did not involve sitting on my butt. From mild to serious, activity until 12:00. At noon I would be thinking, “Oh, I haven’t had any vegetables since 6:00 last night,” so I’d prepare a plate of greens. “Oh, I haven’t had any fruit today. . .” Man, it worked for me and the weight flew off. This relieved some aches and pains I had been experiencing, and at the same time I began feeling more confident of my ownership of my own decisions. For other people a rigid approach like this doesn’t work. You are in a place where you might benefit from experimenting with what works for you. Maybe what we think we need is not always what will work out best if we try different approaches.
    Best advice I ever got here on LS?
    Go to bed.
    Yeah, it gets to a certain hour and I brush, floss, collapse. That has saved me more evenings than I can count. Especially the flossing, which I do not want to have…[Read more]

    • Thank you so much for your wonderful & very much appreciated thoughts. It’s great to think I’m ‘doing this’ whilst being able to hold hands with someone else, I’ve never had that before, and it’s so caring. Thank you

  • yeswecan posted an update 1 month, 1 week ago

    Shout out to @timidwarrior
    Many of us are thinking of you and hoping you are feeling better.

    Devastated by the peanut butter directive and looking online for substitutes.
    Much as I love tahini, I wouldn’t call it a substitute for peanut butter. . .

    • Thank you for the shout out lovely. I am not having the best time at the moment health wise I have three separate issues going at the moment, it is just so frustrating!
      But in good news I finished my last two assignments yesterday so I now have three whole weeks of rest and relaxation ahead of me to focus on my health before starting my final paper! Eeekkk!
      PS I love tahini!

    • Fix n frog maple coffee butter yuuuummmm

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    Hey Bobby.

    I’ve been traveling and missed this post. Yeaaaahhhh for you!
    I’ve never been a social media person, believing that keeping things Face to Face is important. But having joined this site I can say that I have come to really care about so many people, and to be invested in their journeys. You are in my thoughts.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    Thank you, Lars. I’ve been stalking you for a while and am finally to the point where I can admit (behind the internet curtain) how much I have struggled and how much I crave sobriety.
    You have been an inspiration for me, so thanks!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    Yes we can!
    OMG. So lame. Sorry : (

  • yeswecan posted an update 1 month, 1 week ago

    Hello Kingdom of Courage
    Checking in on day 6.
    I feel different than my last run on sobriety that started in January and lasted 3 or 4 months.
    I’m hoping I feel different enough . . .
    Wishing all of you a successful day. I promise not to have a drink with you.

    • Well done on day 6! I’m on a similar journey to yours – heading into day 10 for the second time round ☺️ We can do this!!

    • Thank you, Lars. I’ve been stalking you for a while and am finally to the point where I can admit (behind the internet curtain) how much I have struggled and how much I crave sobriety.
      You have been an inspiration for me, so thanks!

    • Congrats on day 6 – i will not drink with you today 🙂

    • Just passed the midnight mark here. I too join you in not drinking this day.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    What a great story to read! I”m happy that your co-worker has found some insight into making her life a better place to live. And I’m happy you are in range to benefit.
    Yeah, about grudges. I hear you.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    Thank you
    Day 3

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    That’s cool
    She’s cool
    And so are you!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    Dear God, I hope this whole “it gets easier” thing is not like the million bits and pieces I’ve believed for years that turn out not to be true at all. Like the map of your tongue where you taste different flavors in different parts.
    Please let this getting easier fact be true.
    Please let it get easier.
    Please Please Please

    • It does get easier. Not drinking will become your new norm and you go through all your firsts over time, first af Christmas, first af birthday, first af anniversary or whatever. It gets easier, hang on in there.
      Find a really good reason to stay on the wagon. For me it was my husband, it really helped me to know the serious impact my drinking was having on him/us. Sometimes things are easier if we are doing them for the love of someone or something else. Does that make sense @yeswecan?
      Obviously you need to do it for you, but I’m talking about a little extra incentive, looking after the things you care about helps.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    I’ve been too ashamed to post about myself, but after reading your message today I am going to a very uncomfortable place.
    I’m in the same boat with you. Shall we set out together? Lets make today count (again).

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    True, natural eloquence is a beautiful thing.

    Well done on all fronts!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Watch out, Ladyhawke
    That kind of joy can burst your heart wide open : )

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    We are cheering for you, Bobby.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Two of the Great Ones
    Thanks

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 2 months, 4 weeks ago

    Mein Mann ist ein Mann. headache!

    Not to mention I have gone around calling my friends mein Freund instead of ein Freund for months!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    The judge was a woman? Sweet! Bet that busted berserk man’s balls : )

    • @yeswecan Yea, I thought of that afterwards. The regular judge (a male) who put the restraining orders in place (both ex-man’s and mine) was out that day. So she was filling in. I’m glad. 🙂

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    I’m not very tech savvy and didn’t expect this whole big pic to appear. Apologies.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    What a miserable and stressful situation to be in. My heart goes out to you. Congratulations on soldiering through it as you did. You deserve to give yourself a treat.

    • Well, I bought myself a t.v. And I’m wondering about the wisdom, as I have no savings and alo t of needs..oh well. It’s a nice t.v. at a good price. Thank you, @yeswecan.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    It might be helpful to you to research how alcohol affects young bodies and the importance of allowing their organs, especially the brain, to develop without the interference of alcohol. I don’t know if your second child is a daughter, but if you do, please read this

    Did Drinking Give Me Breast Cancer?


    and share it with her.
    I know your approach seems logical and many people argue for it, especially in Europe. Keep reading and decide what you think is best for your kids, then share your reasons with them.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    I’m on a new antidepressant.
    I think it’s working!

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    For me, in my way of thinking, you are at 21 days. You have 21 successes that you worked for and can be proud of. You proved you can beat the monster and you will continue to beat it. Think of an old gunslinger movie. One where every time the gunslinger shoots a bad guy (booze) dead, he makes a mark on his gun. So he’s got 22 slashes on his gun handle and then snap! he shoots some tough hombre and he doesn’t die! Well, that’s a darn pity, but the tough guy doesn’t then sand off the 22 slash marks. He just gets his eyes checked, cleans his gun, and carries on building his awesome reputation.
    Your story is exactly like that!
    Well, to me it is : )
    Carry on with your head held high, Gunsmoke.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    Oh my God. I feel like I know you and you have given so much to me in such a short time. I wish so much I was there to hold you and give you love. Please, please take care of yourself. You are wonderful and important to many people.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 3 weeks ago

    Also

    If you want to see what sobriety can look like, check this out

    https://www.ranker.com/list/before-and-after-photos-of-people-who-quit-drinking/nathandavidson

    • that link was excellent @yeswecan. alcohol certainly ruins our looks. now i know why there were so many ugly bastards at the pub. Not the place to admire some eye candy.

  • yeswecan posted a new activity comment 3 months, 3 weeks ago

    Hello @poiuyt
    How wonderful you have found this site and joined. It’s a bit step and one we will help you continue along, through as many ups and downs as you experience. There may be a lot! My advice especially at first, is to read, read, read. You will find so many different ideas that work for different people in different places at different times.

    I have found reddit to be a great source of information and motivation-
    https://www.reddit.com/r/stopdrinking/

    Take care of yourself and think carefully about what you need. Then do it. Put yourself first. For me there are many days when strenuous exercise during the day and then getting myself into bed early with a book really does the trick.

    I know from certain family members of mine that gambling can be as intoxicating an addiction as alcohol. I hope that you can find people to speak to in person who can help you with both faces both challenges.

    Do your best. That’s all you can ask of yourself. But I promise that for each success you have, big or small, your life will improve. We will be watching for your posts and cheering you on, Poiuyt. Write again soon.

    Your English rocks.

    • Hello yeswecan, thank you for your reply and thank you for all these advises and links. Gambling is my main problem, which comes always after I drink. now I have two problems, alcohol addiction and gambling. I realize that this two problems are dragging me back and I am like on circle, like trapped in some kind of routine. I agree with you, read read and read! I will check all these links which you gave me and will post here any new ideas or news about my situation. Its amazing, how supportive you are, people here.

  • yeswecan became a registered member 4 months ago