• Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 week, 4 days ago

    Kia ora @Andlan. You are doing amazing, those early days can be really tough, there’s no sugar coating it. Sometimes, I felt like I was just trying to get through the hours until bedtime. I used to try all sorts of tricks to distract my mind and body, anything that could get me to another day sober. I cleaned like crazy while listening to heavy metal super loud, tidied and sorted cupboards, I took baths and listened to meditation music, I went to bed at 6.30pm, at times crying into a cup of tea. Please know you are not alone, try to keep things really small and manageable. And stay warm! Hugs x

    • Kia Ora. Yes, I grab sleep when it comes in the knowledge it won’t happen at 3am. Yes we are together, and warm and comfortable here. Very safe and strong I love it. Hugs and warm feelings.

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Hope you get better quickly, and well done on 220 days!

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Yay! Well done that’s really awesome πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Well done, that’s so awesome. Enjoy those warm fuzzies, you’ve earned them!

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    Well @Tom4500, I’m by no means fluent in te reo Maaori, far from it! Every chance I read it incorrectly, but I appreciate the intention and sentiment behind what you said, and I totally agree, it does have a warm feeling, it’s just so beautiful and special. A taonga / treasure. 910 days today for me today, what a ride! Hope you are well xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    Thank you, there have been a few “resolutions” in the last 24 hrs or so, which has lightened the load a lot! x

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    Thanks heaps, yep sleep deprivation is pretty unpleasant. Kiwi blue spring water is my best friend right now! x

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    And to you, I think of you often, hope you are doing ok x

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    Thank you, me koe / and to you x

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    Morena my day buddy, reading your beautiful words, yes, I will get back out in that ocean, it really does give me strength (that’s what I read your sentence to mean right?) And yes, those fleeting drinking thoughts are a nuisance, most recent ones were not nearly as insidious as they were a few weeks back, more like distant niggles, a dull but easily ignored ache. Small victories though, at least I got a few hours sleep last night, that’s progress! Hope your first golf match went well. Arohanui e hoa xo

  • Treehugger posted an update 1 month ago

    Kia ora koutou, feeling incredibly stressed out. Work and home stuff that is keeping me awake at night. I do not cope well at all if I’m not rested, I need a good 8 hrs to function properly. I’ve had fleeing thoughts of booze, but more in a vague, old muscle memory kind of way. Like a fleeting recognition of old behaviours which I don’t do anymore. My current strategy to unwind is shower, comfy pjs, watching shitty, mindless tv in bed sipping iced fizzy water. This is my reality now. If booze is your go to for stress, believe me it is possible to replace it with something else with practice and grit. Arohanui ki a koutou xo

    • Arohanui @treehugger Kia kaha x

    • Hugs beautiful x

    • Kia ora @treehugger. That’s no good, sleep is so important to a feeling of okness isn’t it. I love the sound of your strategies, they certainly will hold you In better stead for managing your life than the booze would have! Arohanui sweetheart.

      • Thanks heaps, yep sleep deprivation is pretty unpleasant. Kiwi blue spring water is my best friend right now! x

    • May work and home stuff become lighter over the next weeks so that you catch a break.
      Well done on going for that hydrating water and not booze!!!

      oxxoxo

      • Thank you, there have been a few “resolutions” in the last 24 hrs or so, which has lightened the load a lot! x

    • Morena @treehugger. I suppose we’ll always get those nuisance, fleeting drinking thoughts. My “never drink” thoughts are stronger. We’re heading into late spring now, so I’m trying to get off my butt and get outside in the nice evenings. I too have been watching too much TV. First golf match tonight, I know I’ll be sore tomorrow, I’ve become out-of-shape. Have to address that, because it’s probably going to get better, or get worse. Sort of like landscapes. Have to put in the work. Kia Kaha toku hoa puta noa te moana. (Did I get that right?)

      • Morena my day buddy, reading your beautiful words, yes, I will get back out in that ocean, it really does give me strength (that’s what I read your sentence to mean right?) And yes, those fleeting drinking thoughts are a nuisance, most recent ones were not nearly as insidious as they were a few weeks back, more like distant niggles, a dull but easily ignored ache. Small victories though, at least I got a few hours sleep last night, that’s progress! Hope your first golf match went well. Arohanui e hoa xo

      • Now that’s kind of funny, because as I recall, I meant to say my friend across the ocean. And then I put you in it? My te reo needs work! I try because I like how the language translates; for me it has a warm feeling, and so many here who use it are my “e-friends”. So I feel it’s fun to try using it, and I’m happy that I’m not stepping on any toes by doing so. Even when I put people in the ocean. Arohanui e hoa, and congrats on your 900 days!

        • Well @Tom4500, I’m by no means fluent in te reo Maaori, far from it! Every chance I read it incorrectly, but I appreciate the intention and sentiment behind what you said, and I totally agree, it does have a warm feeling, it’s just so beautiful and special. A taonga / treasure. 910 days today for me today, what a ride! Hope you are well xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month ago

    I absolutely agree @enzedgirl, sounds fucking awesome. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a good yell, feels great

    • do you ever yell out there in the waves treehugger? would be an ok place to do it!

      PS so nice to see you!

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month, 1 week ago

    Kia ora e hoa/ hello friend πŸ™‚ Always lovely to hear how you’re going, and to see a shout out! Sorry to read about your back, chronic pain is horrible, hope it keeps improving every day. Yep, I’m aware of the upcoming 1000 days also. I remember back when I first joined the site, reading other’s posting about their 1000 day milestone. I was sure I’d never reach that point, but now I have grown in confidence in myself and I have more self belief and respect for my soul than I ever thought I could have. Have a fabulous weekend xo

  • Kia ora koutou xo 875 days, $12,500 saved, all those mornings hangover free. I’ve gained some friends and lost some friends…or should I say, let go of some friends. I’ve learnt a new hobby which brings me so much joy, and have lost some super shitty and destructive habits. I have zero regrets about getting sober. Absolutely. None. Lots of love to all xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    This is so true I totally agree. Having just been on holiday I realise now that I can’t continue how I was during term time, things have got to change. Self care as you just described it is what I need! Thanks for sharing xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Hi @seachangeinme – a friend who suffers from allergies once told me, that the skin is the largest organ and the window into what’s happening inside. Maybe it’s physical, diet, stress…if it’s really bothering you then maybe see a doctor, I don’t remember getting itchy skin, but I do remember headaches, upset tummy and terrible sleep for the first few months. Hope it goes away soon!

  • Kia ora koutou πŸ™‚ I’m not here nearly as often as I used to be. I was thinking about why that could be, and the simple answer is that I was choosing not to allow myself the time to do it. I haven’t been finding sober life that easy in the last two months, I’ve felt pretty shaky at times. I stayed sober, and probably not at a real risk of actually having a drink, but the bitch ass voice was loud and proud and festering away in my mind and taking way too much space in my head. Now, having returned from a tropical holiday, most of which involved my favourite place, te moana/the ocean, I can see now that I was so tightly wound up in my stress, that a door was being opened to a dark place. I feel loads better now, recharged and sober fit. I must be at around 870 + days now. For those just starting out, it’s one hell of a journey getting sober, but entirely possible with support, community and self care. You are not alone, there are so many of us who get it and are on our own windy paths of freedom. Sending awhi/hugs to those who need them, and kaha/strength to those who are struggling. You’ve got this xo

    • Kia ora wahine toa 😊❤️ Nice to see you here. Sorry to hear you’ve been struggling but equally glad that a rest / break has cast some light and relief for you.

      Come up to Aucks for a catch up on May 5th?

    • Kia ora @treehugger. I was thinking of you and wondering how you were getting on. Nice to hear from you

    • Congrats and awesome to see you back❤️

    • So glad that you have come back from a beautiful holiday refreshed and with renewed energy to keep that wine witch at bay xxx

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Kia ora e hoa! I’m still around πŸ™‚ I will admit, I haven’t been on here very often, I could give lots of boring reasons about why, but the simple answer is that I have not been allowing myself the time to do it, which may not have been a great idea as I have been feeling a little shakey…however I think now that I am back from a relaxing overseas holiday I feel much better! Thanks for the shout out xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 2 months, 3 weeks ago

    πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 2 months, 3 weeks ago

    @MissFreedom – I used to do this when I first got sober. I would float like a starfish and if calm enough close my eyes and just listen to the gurgly underwater sounds…so peaceful and soothing πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 2 months, 3 weeks ago

    @robynb, have you always suffered with sinus pain? My sister swears by sinus rinsing, I tried it once and hated it! My latest bout was due to surfers ear (infection from trapped sea water) and the time before that it was actually deferred tooth pain. Hope you get some relief soon!

    • I use a sinus rinse, (me to pot) I do everything! Yes, have suffered from it off and on for last 15 or 20 years, but I avoid seeking medical advice or any prescriptions, heaven forbid! I will be fine, just need to down lots of fluid, thank you.

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 2 months, 3 weeks ago

    Kia ora e hoa, sleep well. Always glad to see a post from you when I pop in. I’m not here as often as I used to be, but still here all the same πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted an update 3 months ago

    Morena koutou. Firstly, sending much love to all of our whΓ₯nau in Christchurch. My heart just aches for everything that you are going through. For those who have lost friends and family, Kei te mihi atu ahau ki tou whΓ₯nau pani, ka nui te aroha. I acknowledge and send love to you as you are grieving. I’m really at a loss of what else to say. For me, I have spent most of my weekend being a sober driver to people who are more than tiddly…this, along with my heavy heart, means I need to get out into the sea to cleanse and reset. Remember to practice self care, don’t forget to put your own oxygen mask on so that you are fit to help those who need you. Arohanui ki a koutou whΓ₯nau xo

    • Thank you @Treehugger you beautiful girl, enjoy your surf xoxo

    • Lovely words dear friend. Much love back to you. This is a grievous thing for the whole country, no one is free of the pain of it. XXXX Arohanui XXXX I hope the sea cleansed and reset you. I longed for the beach, but at least got to my lovely nearby park and that felt so healing. Just the drizzle and the trees, dogs playing, oblivious to the human craziness.

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    @Tom4500 – thank you for your kind words πŸ™‚ I will stay strong my friend xo “me koe” – and you too!

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    Awww, bless, exactly what I was thinking too πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    826 days with not a drop…I’m looking forward to a 1000 πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    Totally! Hope all’s going well with you @timidwarrior xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    I know, it was such a great reminder of why sober mornings are just so amazing! Feeling very tearful this afternoon, and although I didn’t act on my thoughts of feelings to drink…maybe a little ashamed that I was falling into a place of complacency. But, if my honestly helps someone else, then that’s a huge positive πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    Aww, thanks. Been thinking of you too πŸ™‚

  • A cautionary tale – always. be. vigilant. I haven’t been present on the members feed much recently, mostly because of my busy day to day life, but also deep down, I have been feeling quietly confident that I have this sober gig sussed. Well, I’ve had a few drinking dreams lately, the voice has been seductively whispering and last night I had the strongest feeling about drinking since the early days. It wasn’t the desperate grief that I felt early on, like I just could not do without a drink. It was more of a sudden “caught off guard, autopilot numbness. So bizarre, I fear that had I been with the wrong people, in the wrong place at the wrong time, I may have drank. Well, I didn’t have booze with me, and I was with people who don’t drink, and we went to a gig where I proceeded to be surrounded by thousands of drunk, messy, loud and mostly gross grown adults falling over, vomitting in bushes, and spitting as they talk. I was take aback by the raw reality of what I was seeing, and then this morning, going out for breakfast and seeing many hungover faces I realised I need this place again, to put some tools back into place. It was a rude awakening and reminder of my reality, as a person who can never, ever, drink again. I. do. not. drink. Arohanui ki a koutou xo

    • Yes be vigilant. I felt that by reading your post I was there the next morning having breakfast and feeling completely disappointed in myself that I chose that life. No thank you!

      • I know, it was such a great reminder of why sober mornings are just so amazing! Feeling very tearful this afternoon, and although I didn’t act on my thoughts of feelings to drink…maybe a little ashamed that I was falling into a place of complacency. But, if my honestly helps someone else, then that’s a huge positive πŸ™‚

    • Glad to see you @treehugger I’ve been thinking of you xxx

    • Wow a great reminder that we must always be vigilant of our thoughts! Also a great reminder of why we don’t drink!

    • Whoa (can’t see it, how long have you come without a drop, now?) Ohhhh….staying very vigilant …good reminder.

    • Day companion. Glad I got on tonight, before I get to bed. You’re right, we don’t drink. Rule number 1. No matter what else, we follow rule 1. We know that. And it’s not a curse, it’s a renaissance. We have been restored. Day 824, you’ve always been two steps ahead of me. Kia kaha e hoa.

    • That’s so helpful to know. From my newbie perspective of 10 days, I assumed I would have it completely nailed by day 826. Thank you for sharing it xx

    • ❤️💕 @tom4500 there’s a LOT of history of the suppression of this beautiful language which @treehugger is probably more qualified to talk about than me – so part of the goosebumps is seeing a language nearly lost being used in new places.

      You’re right it’s a lovely warm language which is embedded in a beautiful culture …. and you ain’t no ordinary ANYTHING, to be sure xxx

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 4 months ago

    Oh what a relief, and soon after you will have the results too. Have been thinking of you both. Yay, it’s actually really exciting when people get to that point where you are simply not a drinker, no big deal let’s move on stage, don’t you think? So cool πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 4 months, 1 week ago

    Oh my gosh @Tom4500, I haven’t been on for a while and I just read this and thought, shit, we’re day buddies (pretty well) and so I checked and my 800 days was yesterday. I didn’t even realise! Gosh how things have changed for me in that time, my life is completely different, different friends, different hobbies, my health is soooo much better, sleep better, I have had a pretty big promotion at work…I just simply cannot imagine ever wanting booze in my life ever again. I feel so blessed and lucky. All the best for your wife tomorrow, I’m sure that must be pretty stressful for you both. Sending some big reassuring cyber hugs to you both over the Pacific!

    • Congrats to you too @treehugger πŸ˜€

    • We sure are day buddies, every time I hit one of these milestones. I think about you getting there too. More important, I fell like I’m doing great and it sounds like you’re doing even better! No way I go back to the old way.

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 4 months, 1 week ago

    Aww, thanks for the shoutout @enzedgirl πŸ™‚ I’m good, very very busy in a new role at work, but good. Still loving sober life of course and sticking with my new year resolution to maintain a healthy work life balance… a constant struggle! Hope all is well with you too xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months ago

    Welcome and nice name πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months ago

    I hear you @Pandapower, I was really affected by this movie too. So powerful and really well done. My friend called watching this movie, “a journey”. Don’t let your feelings of uncertainty get you down, nothing wrong with the future being unknown. The unknown can be exciting, it holds promise and possibilities. It’s ok to be scared too, take each day as it comes and just do your best xo

    • Thank you…thanks for saying it ok to be scared. It just is hard some days!

      • I loved the movie and I saw it drunk first when it came out last summer (or buzzed) and now I saw it sober today at almost 90 days and had a completely different take on it today. I really enjoyed it but it is sad…..I knew it would be as I had seen the 70’s version several times. Definitely remember it’s just a movie- it’s easy to allow movies and music to allow us to wallow in over emotionalism. I’m in my 50’s too …..I get being scared. But that will pass. It’s when we hold onto the fear that it causes us problems. Just sense it, feel it and let it go….I found that learning how to switch my mind from going down the road to sadness, fear, etc to a more positive note takes practice but it’s worth working on. πŸ™‚

    • I heard that movie is intense!!

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months ago

    to be honest I can’t remember exact timeframes but i think I noticed improvements in my memory after around 6-8 months sober. That said, everyone’s journey is so very different depending on so many factors so try not to get hung up on lengths of time too much. Just focus on day to day is my advice x

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months ago

    I suffered with terrible short term memory loss. It got much worse initially, as did the insomnia, but it settled eventually.

    • @treehugger how long did that take for you? Glad you are on the mend. That dang booze!

      • to be honest I can’t remember exact timeframes but i think I noticed improvements in my memory after around 6-8 months sober. That said, everyone’s journey is so very different depending on so many factors so try not to get hung up on lengths of time too much. Just focus on day to day is my advice x

      • @treehugger oh yes, I am counting my lucky stars I didn’t have that issue much….but if I start again it will obviously happen! Day by day is the best advice on just about everything isn’t it? πŸ™‚ xx

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Welcome! Love your user name @janelovescats, I love cats too!

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Oh, yay, I love Nina Simone! Have you seen the documentary about her on Netflix? Was a real eye opener. Glad you had another fabulous tank of joy filling weekend @Prudence xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Sounds awesome @Noelle, enjoy xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    @kitten – initially I was the master drink counter. I could be in a room of 10+ people and be able to recite exactly how many drinks, what they were, and over what period of time for each person. Gradually I cared less and less and about who was drinking what and became more present in what was happening for me. I am still very aware of other people’s level of intoxication though and I use it as a gauge of how comfortable I feel and when’s a good time for me to leave xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    I agree with as above @kjpeche, it’s ok to grieve and feel sad – I was the same, there was a time that drinking was a fun, cool activity that I did with my husband…until it wasn’t fun anymore. You have those happy memories, you won’t lose those. But with time, you will also create some amazing, special and authentic sober ones too. Big hugs, I totally get where you are coming from xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Welcome to our wonderful supportive place @libbysscc πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    You’ve got this, just don’t have that first drinks, have the 5th, 6th or 7th snack instead. Tomorrow will come soon xo

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Big congratulations @Lizzy! You have been a big part of supporting me through my two years here on LS and staying sober so thank you for your wisdom and insight. So awesome πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    As much as possible. I’ve only been surfing for a year so it’s been tricky with so many holidaymakers and the line ups full to the brim. Just having to be creative and look for a wave in quieter spots. The ocean is my happy place πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    @Prudence – you continue to inspire me with your living life to the full! I actually thought of you as I danced my butt off at a gig and I just felt so much joy and happiness and I was sober and although surrounded by booze I did not give a shit. Just in the muso zone and loving it. Sober is amazing πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    And to you @Thor – lovely photo that you have for your avatar πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Huge welcome @Babyface9347 πŸ™‚

  • Treehugger posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Good attitude πŸ™‚ You been out surfing much @tim?

    • Wee bit n swimin you?

      • As much as possible. I’ve only been surfing for a year so it’s been tricky with so many holidaymakers and the line ups full to the brim. Just having to be creative and look for a wave in quieter spots. The ocean is my happy place πŸ™‚

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