I'm a 47 years old wife and mother of two children. A son who's 24 and a daughter who's 15. I'm also a step mom to my 22 year old son since he was 3. I'm on my second marriage and we've been together for 18 years. My relationship with alcohol started when I was around 18. I've been a party girl always. I drank very heavily with all the guys that I hung out with. Shots and beer and whiskey and vodka. Not too much wine in my early days. I just always remember having tons of alcohol there. We partied all the time. Almost everything I did had alcohol involved. I have absolutely no stop button. I drink until I'm way drunk. I dated a bunch of different people but I always were in the drinking groups. That's because that's what I did. I have so many drunk days and nights under my belt. It's impossible for me to even try to remember them all. I'm also a sloppy drunk. And a fired up drunk. Also a drunk that will get in your face. To be honest, I've toned things down in the past years. I definitely don't drink every day. Some times not even for a couple of weeks. But then it comes back and I love it and I drink the whole bottle of wine because now I love wine for like the past 5 years. I end up acting stupid and really regretting everything I do when I'm plastered. My husband has had enough and to be honest I have too. Its been a long time coming to get to this point. I'm actually only 6 days in but soon that number will be huge. I have a ton of summer events that I always drink heavily at but I'm just going to have to suck it up and be happy that I've finally made this change for myself and my family. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and be honest with this fact....... there has never been nor will there be a day where I can just have one! So if I just can't have one then I just won't have any.
I survived my first ever sober camping trip! We just got back Saturday and went for 8 days. I couldn’t believe that this was ever possible. Today is day 47 and I’ve done a ton of reading and listening to peoples stories and comments about how life is happy without drinking. I tried it, very reluctantly at first…. but their all right! No alcohol was needed to have a good time. I hung out with friends and family who were drinking and I never once felt I needed one. In fact I felt the complete opposite! I was laughing and having a great time without that poison. I also remember every single conversation, stayed up late ( instead of passing out by 9!), made great memories and didn’t act like a jerk or act super loud. Its a relief to finally be done with that bullshit. I like being happy almost every day, no hangovers, no mood swings,no night sweats, no blackouts, no uncontrollable voice in my head constantly asking about alcohol! Now its just silence! I honestly had no idea how out of control my situation had become. It just felt normal because that’s the way I lived for so long. Like I said my friends who I’ve known since high school were there. I had an interesting experiment on my hands. I had to take the time to explain that I wasn’t drinking ever again. They were very supportive of this decision but I found that I didn’t want to have to do this every single time this situation comes up. So the next day I put a post on facebook to all my friends explaining that I had great news. That I decided to start living a sober lifestyle because I was beginning to feel like alcohol wasn’t doing me any favors anymore. I explained that I joined an online support group and that I’ve also been reading books like The Naked Mind. I said how happy I felt and what great success I’ve had already and how great I felt. Well, I have to pat myself on the back for that bold move. The word is out and now I don’t have to go through that torment of explaining myself every time I go out. I’m very happy and thankful for the small things I’m learning now. Hope everyone is enjoying a happy af day 🙂
I like it, tgrim. That’s kind of the “rip that band-aid off” approach to letting people know. Just do it all at once. My method was similar. Some people have issues, such as work situations, where secrecy with regard to their alcohol problem prevents them from taking that path, and I’m good with that, too. I sure am glad that you’ve found the new and improved camping trip method, and had a great time. I’m at a campground this very moment, just four nights. A nearby town is having a week-long “Cheeseburger Festival”; a rather alcohol-soaked event. But really, most there aren’t over-doing it. Not like I used to.
I did a sober road trip with my sister earlier this Summer, it was the best trip of my adult life. Every single airbnb we stayed in left us wine and beer and one even left a huge basket of nips. I ignored it all and built amazing memories.
“[M]y first ever sober camping trip! We just got back Saturday and went for 8 days.” Great job!
I’ve treated most vacations as an excuse to drink even more! And then I get back, more exhausted than ever, from the “vacation.”
Maybe we should think of ourselves as on “vacation” from alcohol. “I’m on vacation from alcohol.” It’s a good thing, not a bad one.
Most friends I have that drink, like me, drink way too much.
I stopped drinking for 6 months once and my friends all wanted me to drink again. I would say, “I’m becoming an alcoholic.” A friend would say, “No, you’re not. How do you know you’re an alcoholic?” My answer to that question: “Tell yourself right now you’re not going to drink for 30 days. Then do it.” You can see it immediately in the eyes of a functional alcoholic–they cannot bear the thought of not drinking for 30 days.
@max-alabama, I really don’t think you can say anything about boozing that would offend anyone here! We all have our own best horror stories. I think every one of us has tried moderating and failed ..numerous times, and would have looked horrified at the thought of 30 days without drinking at many points in time.