• Sleep and anxiety still a mess atm but I’m happy and sober. No struggles this time round I dont even feel deprived now. I highly recommend Stop Drinking Now by Allen Carr that book totally changed my mindset. Nothing else worked but that book it’s like magical. I now see alcohol for what it is its rubbish.

    Day 10

  • Stopthatsnotme posted an update 7 months ago

    I decided to put the drink down for good. My drinking had gotten worse the last days took me to some extreme dark places I’ve never been. I’m 5 days clean and I have no desire to drink anymore. I’m looking forward to the sober meet up in Auckland.

    Ps when does the sleep get better? Having trouble sleeping since I stopped drinking.

    • I had a restful night’s sleep after about 10 -11 days after quitting. I am at day 15 and for the first time today I woke up feeling the best since quitting. I didn’t feel amazing but it was better than the last 2 weeks.

    • Looking forward to meeting you then too @stopthatsnotme

      So proud of you for just keeping on keeping on with this hard journey xxx

    • After the ten day detox gradually improves. Melatonin is helpful . Keep going lovely you’ve built up the day count before. You can do this. Happy new year! ❤️❤️

  • Hi guys! I have decided I can’t do this on my own I’ve tried it all unfortunately nothing has worked long term for me. I’m checking myself into a private rehab on Monday morning this is my next step I’ve never done this before and looking forward to a brighter future ahead. Noone has pushed me to go there it’s me wanting to change which is a huge step. 1 whole month away see you guys on the other side! We all come to a point when enough is enough and I’ve tried many times to sort this out on my own but have failed miserably. Time to heal now.

    Day 2

  • Stopthatsnotme posted an update 9 months ago

    Anxiety/ocd is all over the show. Feel so ill panicky in public like I’m going to faint or die. I’m on prescription medication have been for a long time but the boozing has made it worse. I feel like I really got it this time round. I’m absorbing and studying Allen Carr book stop drinking now and it’s really making sense to me total sense. Nothing has made real sense to me except this little gem I highly recommend it to anyone struggling I have 0 desire to even drink the stuff.

    Day 4

    • Thanks for the recommendation @stopthatsnotme, I haven’t got round to reading any books yet but I think it might be a good idea!

    • hey @stopthatsnotme you’ve got my email addy mate if you feel like emailing while the site is down i’d be cool with that x

    • Hi @Stopthatsnotme sorry to hear about the anxiety/ocd – do the meds work ok for you when you’re not drinking? I read that book too a while back, it is a little gem, also love William Porter, felt like I’d been smacked in the face with a wet fish, such a wake up call….well done on Day 4, you’ve been super super strong in the past and you’re super super strong now, you’ve got this!

  • Stopthatsnotme posted an update 9 months ago

    Anxiety/ocd is all over the show. Feel so ill panicky in public like I’m going to faint or die. I’m on prescription medication have been for a long time but the boozing has made it worse. I feel like I really got it this time round. I’m absorbing and studying Allen Carr book stop drinking now and it’s really making sense to me total sense. Nothing has made real sense to me except this little gem I highly recommend it to anyone struggling I have 0 desire to even drink the stuff.

    Day 4

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 9 months ago

    @Crystaltips yea i got to 162 days this year not too long ago. We got this!

  • Stopthatsnotme posted an update 9 months ago

    So I’ve ditched the beers this morning great feeling. At AA atm. Let’s do this!

  • Stopthatsnotme‘s profile was updated 9 months ago

  • Stopthatsnotme posted an update 9 months ago

    I’m gonna be straight up. I binge again on Friday feel silly but I know I got not a habit but an addiction. I’ve bought Allen Carr book stop drinking now. And I swear it’s working. This book is totally making sense to me. I still have bottles of beers in the fridge from Friday and haven’t even touched them cos this book is making total sense. I’m ditching them this morning. If anyone who has tried everything and it hasn’t worked I swear by this book. Study it! That’s what I’m doing. And boy it making total sense.

    Day 3

    • Well done @stopthatsnotme for starting over again! It is a hard road but you can do it! I am glad you have found something that seems to be working for you. I may have to check out that book myself! Thanks for sharing x

    • I swear by this book as well. I read it after reading ‘Mrs D is Going Without’ and haven’t looked back since then. Another good read is ‘Alcohol Explained’ (http://www.alcoholexplained.com ) I’ve only read what is available online but gosh it’s got some good info. Knowledge is power. Definitely remove the alcohol. It’s best at these beginning stages. 🙂

    • @Crystaltips yea i got to 162 days this year not too long ago. We got this!

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 9 months ago

    @enzedgirl yes count me in!

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 9 months ago

    @Ridge I’m too is day 4. We got this!

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 9 months, 1 week ago

    @enzedgirl na like reminding myself how bad drinking is for me

  • I know this sounds bad but I’m getting obsessed with the idea of not having to drink alcohol whatever works right.

    Day 3

    • Just accept that af forever will set you free! You know in your head and your heart you can’t moderate and you had a huge day count achieved prior! You’ve got this!!

    • Doesn’t sound bad but I don’t get what you mean? You’re obsessed with not *having* to drink alcohol @stopthatsnotme ….?

      Not having to drink alcohol is a good thing, isn’t it?

      Or do you mean you’re feeling like you’re thinking a lot about not being *able* to drink alcohol ….?

    • Right! Whatever works-throw the kitchen sink at it. You’ll be obsessed with thinking about drinking for a long time. Gradually you’ll fill up your time and thoughts with other things and be surprised you don’t think about drinking at all. You’re right where you should be. Think about it, but don’t do it. XO

    • Its ok @stopthatsnotme!!
      We know there are funky as shit weird cycles ..and our thoughts will do it….just be aware of them, simply remember u are on the road to FREEDOM…and those thoughts will pass. In the meantime, do self care and treat yourself to what sounds good….food, special tea or coffee, whatever makes u feel good_lol…
      shopping? Working out? Binge watching tv or movies or Netflix?
      Xoxo

  • I was a every other day sometimes every day binge drinker for quite some time. I stopped suddenly early this year without consulting my doctor and I had terrible withdraws I went to see a doctor cos I felt very unwell that first few weeks and suffered excruciating headaches which I never get. I end up having an MRI scan just in case and you know it came back clear. It was my body withdrawing from the alcohol. I got to 162 days clean not too long ago and have binge to blackouts approx 10 times since. I never wanna get to that stage again with having withdraws like that. I’m wanting a drink now but I’m sitting with the idea till it passes . And yes it does pass. Back to AA I go.

    Day 2

    • Be proud of your decision. Well done @stopthatsnotme.

    • sit on that craving @stopthatsnotme that’s my girl 🙂

      you can do a good long stretch again, like last time.

      How are you finding AA?

    • Glad yo’re back and working on it. You’ve done so well before, you know what to do. If AA works for you, then I love AA.

    • Well done on not giving up @stopthatsnotme. Binge drinking is awful and time consuming, the after thoughts, hangovers, guilt and regret used to do my head in. Play it forward from wanting that drink to what happens at the end of the binge or waking up the next morning thinking oooohhhh nooo, then give it a miss, have a big meal and know when you wake up tomorrow your a sober warrior

    • Hi ya ive binged to blackout 2
      Bloody scary
      Ive been told thats how wet brain can happen
      You black out and dont come back!!
      This is serious stuff aye!!
      People laugh about drunkenness and getting wasted but when you get to our point its not funny or fun anymore just complete madness.
      You take good care of yourself!!
      Keep posting!!
      Stay well clear of the first drink thats the one that gets you.
      If you dont hav the first one you wont hav a second one and so on !!
      Dont listern to your addictive voice ether it my sound like your own voice but its cunning and wants to take you out!!
      Stay strong!@
      We can do this!!

    • Keep at it @Stopthatsnotme. The good news is we can undo all that damage from the drinking and black outs. Black outs were with me almost every time I drank near the end. No more. x

    • @stopthatsnotme never give up, u know u can do this, u have done it before, so keep on keeping on 🙂

    • Takes courage to do what you’re doing @stopthatsnotme – and you’ve got plenty of that. I too binged drunk and blacked out – like @kate1975. I got to the stage where instead of hubby helping me to bed, he’d leave me on the couch, but take the glass out of my hand so i didn’t drop it and spill the wine. even ended up with plastic wine glasses as i used to break so many and then i’d wake up in the morning still on the couch and then get ready and drive to work 🙁 omg, wtf i think now.
      You can do this, i know you can and so do you.
      We all believe in you.
      Take care xxx

  • Changing my mindset.

    Day 2

  • I will attend AA daily as long as it takes. AA does work but I stopped going.

    • I know. AA does work, it is good for us, but it’s so easy to stop going. My relationship with AA is changing – I was losing myself in it and that wasn’t sitting well. So I’ve taken a little break and stepped back, but I do love my AA tribe and with a clear, fresh mind, I feel ready to go to an occasional meeting and take what I need.

    • Ive also picked up my AA meetings and find every time i go I get yet another reminder of why I musnt drink! I can easily forget that message. Dont know about sponsers—-have had 2 disasterous ones–they were actually bullies and I dont need to feel worse about myself than I already do.

    • sounds like a plan @stopthatsnotme good to see you hon 🙂

  • Stopthatsnotme‘s profile was updated 9 months, 2 weeks ago

  • Stopthatsnotme posted an update 10 months ago

    Another great day

    Day 14

  • Stopthatsnotme posted an update 10 months ago

    Waving out those urge surfing waves. I might have to find another private counselor they said they will get back to me with a time for second appt but they havent and it’s been 2 days? Kinda slack tbh anyways off to the gym

    Day 12

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 1 week ago

    @tyrvin it’s okay buddy pick ya self up! All I can say is if you can get to a AA meeting today please do it! It may save your life.

  • Taken myself to a meeting tonight needed to be here. I’m fantasizing about drinking but its okay I’m just urge surfing it will past.
    Day 10 tomorrow.

  • What a fantastic morning to wake up not hungover on a Sunday. Life is so much better without that poison in my life. What a complete waste of time that was my drinking career that is it had to come to a stop before it takes me out. Personally for me I look at alcohol as a suicide in a bottle.

    Day 9

    • Indeed – my weekends were hard earned, but always a blurry chaos – this is the third week in which they have been busy but enjoyable. x

    • Agreed! I.wasn’t a daily drinker,.or even a weekly drinker, but oh boy..when I drsnk. Sucked.down three packs of cigarettes, fell.and hit my noggin on many occasions, lucky I didn’t fall.I’m the drink and drown ( often drank at a bar near the water). I shudder to think of it.

    • Hallejuha @stopthatsnotme 🙂

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 1 week ago

    @kerrieBear yeah total time waster a which steals our joy and ruins everything around us. Like they say its not an individual disease it’s a family disease. Go figure!

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 1 week ago

    @enzedgirl so not worth it. It’s like an old boyfriend you keep going back and forth with and it comes to a point that your absolutely over it that you just give it away and not look back.

  • Perfect time to want to drink sun is shining I feel good not going there anymore enough is enough. How I think now is that if I pick up that’s 10-14 bottles beer later it’s a good few hours of fun then it’s all down hill waking up thinking what the eff happened last night? How did I get home? Who did I text or ring? Waking up running to the toilet spewing my lungs out most of the day and sometimes paying for it the next following day. Not worth it anymore not even gonna fight it.

  • Another great morning to wake up sober. This time last week I had my head down the toilet no more.

    Day 8

  • Keeping a diary about when the urges come and what brought it on etc my counselor said it’s best way to start tracking this all down. I got this!

    Day 6

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 1 week ago

    @mistchance oh definitely the signs of alcohol withdraws that first week I stopped suddenly which I should had consulted my doctor first I felt very nauseous and had these extreme cluster headaches was terrible I ended up at the after hours I even had a MRI incase but obviously that was clear. Just be careful have u spoken to your doctor about stopping? But yes definitely sounds like yr body has gone into shock.

    • No, I haven’t admitted to my Doctor about my drinking, I’ve been concentrating on sorting out the menopause crap symptoms with him. Still had a headache today but no nausea. Think I’ll be okay as nothing too bad. Dealt with worse over the years.

  • Got back from counselling some real deep convo tonight looking forward to understanding this whole alcoholism thing. And gaining a new thought pattern. I feel like I’m finally on the right path now.
    Got homework to do now

  • I’m really looking forward to a clean sober life and gaining the skills I truly need off to private counselling in an hour my life is going to be transformed for the better. It was time I reached out for professional help this time round.

    Day 5

  • Any Auckland meet ups anytime soon? Or did I miss the boat yet again.

  • Just got back from a AA meeting tonight very good insightful words tonight.
    Got my counselling all booked for tomorrow.
    I feel like I’ve finally getting somewhere now. It’s about time.

  • I just did some grocery shopping and witness a female I would say in her 70s drinking a box of beers to herself and spilling it all over her. I felt sadness watching her. It made me realise if I keep on like this I would be like that. It’s such a sad lonely disease. I’m determined to beat this.

    Day 4

  • The private counselor got back have booked in to see him Wednesday . I am writing a abit about myself my triggers what I like about drinking and what I dont like about drinking you can figure what I dont like about my drinking far out weighs my likes.
    I finally feel I’m on the road of recovery it took a long time to reach for proper help but I know I need it .

    • I feel like you’re on the road to recovery too @stopthatsnotme 🙂

    • Good on you for seeking that help, you are doing all the right things x

    • That’s such a positive thing to do @stopthat’snotme. Sometimes these things are just too much to bear alone. And besides, whoever was born with an in built toolbox for coping with everything that life may throw at them? We all need help sometimes, so good for you for taking that positive step.

  • Crappy sleep last night didnt get till bed till after 2am I binge on chocolate biscuits,pasta and all sorts. Its algd I’m sober and that’s the main thing. I couldn’t last 2 days without a binge.

    Day 3

    • Good on u ! See u can do this.

      • Also keep remembering the 162 days u got to last time. That’s a lot of learning and transformation that can never be taken away.

        • So true @winner– you never start from the beginning again do you. The clarity does stay to some degree, grow you up a bit more perhaps and then you can’t ungrow ;). Yay on day 3 @stopthat’snotme. Better a full tummy than a skinfull XXX

    • Whatever you need to do to get over that hump. I kept believing them when they’d say it gets easier, so I keep trying . At two months I can’t say I’m “cured” but it’s definitely easier. Kven O’Hara says you have to be 100% committed, not 99% to quitting. It took me a long time to get to 100% (if I’m even truly there). To me, that means being willing to do whatever it takes to not drink. I don’t WANT to tell anyone when I’m stuggling, but that’s what I have to do. It makes it easier. Best wishes!

    • We’re with you! We can do this together. xoxo

    • My motto is…. Never underestimate the therapeutic power of chocolate!

    • One thing I can promise is that the sleep does get better. At day 52 I am sleeping a better and deeper sleep than I have in years. Very seldom do I have the tossing and turning I used to have at 3:00 AM.

  • Its day 3 and cant sleep.

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 2 weeks ago

    @Shannac good stuff! I’m a day behind you we got this!

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 2 weeks ago

    @Agirl thank you.

  • Stopthatsnotme changed their profile picture 10 months, 2 weeks ago

  • Shit like this pisses me off. My child is away for the school holidays with the father family I just text to see how they are? I get a reply wdf is wrong with you? Hope you not drinking?
    This stuff pisses me off he knows I’m going to get counselling and he accuses me of drinking? So over it
    Anyways I had a choice to drink today but I did not.
    Will be day 3 tomorrow. Sorry for the rant but that shit is no help.

    • Excellent choice @stopthatsnotme, you have got this

    • Ugh dickhead. Well done on staying sober!!!

    • Good work @Stopthatsnot me for staying sober. Men can be such wankers!

    • You are doing great with not drinking, keep that up. That very same thing happened to me except my sons dad got him to make the accusation on his (my son’s ) phone. I was not drinking and it hurt me very much that my son’s Dad would use him that way. It took a lot of my energy feeling the anger from that and at the end of the day I could hold my head high and know in my heart it was not true. You can’t control how other people behave but you can chose to not get dragged down by that behaviour. You are sober, you have nothing to be ashamed of. You are in control here, if they choose to behave as they are, that is their choice and they can live with it. You don’t have to buy into that.xx

    • Good on you for not rising to it. Since he knows u have successfully kicked this before he should have more faith. U are doing great ! Keep going u can so do this. You have all the tools believe in yourself . Hope this week is better for u.

    • He’s a dumbass. You did good, keep in keeping on! xxoo.

    • Keep trucking along @stopthatsnotme that was a low blow but I agree with all the above comments you are doing great , you’re determined to beat this and you WILL !

    • @stopthatsnotme just think how good it’ll be when he can no longer hurl low blows like that at u! Keep it up don’t let the naysayers get u down 🙂

  • Stopthatsnotme‘s profile was updated 10 months, 2 weeks ago

  • Got some crappy news but it’s okay unfortunately rehab will had to be postponed to a later date now due to family commitments. I have emailed some private counselling today hopefully to hear back from them tomorrow. I want to learn the skills to be able stop drinking but I just don’t know how to that? For today I won’t drink I can do this.

    Day 2

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 2 weeks ago

    @SharonT thank you booked appt for rehab Monday time to heal now.

  • Got an appointment Monday for rehab . I’m looking forward to gaining the skills I truly need.

  • Stopthatsnotme‘s profile was updated 10 months, 2 weeks ago

  • I’ve had enough I cant stop drinking I need help asap. I feel absolutely soul broken absolutely hopeless feeling that i wish I wasnt here anymore. Have rung a rehab clinic I have no other choice I need to get better.

    0-1 days sober? Idk

    • Hey, lovely, you’ve done it before and you can do it again. You are determined and you keep coming back here. Just for today, don’t pick up a drink. You can do this @stopthatsnotme. Just for today….

    • Oh this makes my heart burst with sadness. Please do ring the rehab, take care of yourself and most all forgive and be kind. Posting this message shows you do still care for yourself, so sending Aroha to you from NZ.

    • More love coming your way from NZ. It gets better @Stopthatsnotme. OMG—so many times Ive been where you are right now. x

    • holding your hand as tight as i can. most of us know exactly how you feel, unfortunately. glad you chose rehab.

    • oxoxoxoxo

      Let those professionals carry you through these scary and heavy first days….I am proud of you for reaching out for help. It’s ok to need help. It’s not your fault. It is an illness like any other and you deserve the right treatments and medications to help you recover your health and safety.

      Lots of strength your way. Just know it won’t always feel this way and there is healing and help.

      oxoxoxo

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 2 weeks ago

    @honestjoy changing my number deleted social media is a huge start removing yourself from certain types of people.

  • Doing this whole sobriety different this time round total different mind set. I got to 162 days clean recently and have binge 4 times since no more. If anyone reading this don’t even pick up you will regret it!

    Day 2

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 2 weeks ago

    @Taza I’ll remember ya! Definitely can do it I did 162 days clean this year not long ago I know I can do it again.

  • Stopthatsnotme posted a new activity comment 10 months, 2 weeks ago

    @AnneC boredom is a killer for me and also a relationship break up I was doing good but since I’m alone now I find comfort in the bottle but I know it does not work that way. I’m going back to meetings. I can do this.

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