I want to stop drinking forever. I struggle with sobriety and have always used alcohol as a coping mechanism. My Fathers am alcoholic and I feel I am not far behind. I know that it’s stopping me from getting to the next level of my life. I want to be able to say “No thank you, I don’t drink” as opposed to the old line “Ok, just one” . I need support & help.
I feel everything. I am intuitive by birth and by nature. Before I could truly realise the potential of these spiritual gifts, I was numbing and blocking the power with alcohol from as young as 14. I got the “taste” after giving into a mix of curiosity and peer pressure. I started sneaking sips from my Dad’s bottles of Moonshine, and then a group of friends would make friends who were older than us with a purpose. To buy alcohol. I would lie and say I would be going to a sleepover. In my eyes my parents were too old fashioned and would never let me go to parties in the weekend. The reality was that I would be drinking vodka as fast as I could, and be vomiting in a garden by midnight. Then there was the time, that I was actually allowed to have alcohol and I greedily chose every RTD under the sun. I was only 15. The choices I made that night and the price I had to pay with being violently ill. Culturally, all my peers would laugh at this story. Because it would be their story, and I too would be laughing. I’m not laughing now. I’ve been drinking for two decades and now I am stopping. Forever. As my days become clearer and my senses return, I feel my spiritual self awakening. I think about the work that needs to be done to reverse the effects of the destruction I have caused.
So, i took another step today. I signed up to do a half marathon. I got a personal trainer and a mindset coach to help me do it better.
I have never ever done this sort of thing before in my life!
It is something that “others” did. Not me.
Just like being sober.
Tomorrow I celebrate my first month being alcohol free.
Well done and Kia kaha. @MaoriGirlSober, our families and parents have a lot to answer, but they didn’t mean harm, they were doing the best at the time. Best look forward, not back, and enjoy those lovely sober mornings, the absence of lies and the healthy bank balance.