Hi tribe, living under a bit of a cloak of sadness here with a terrible diagnosis for a beloved extended family member. Just sad sad sad, so so sad. No other word for it. Sad. Trying very hard to move quickly into accepting the situation (this from all my mindfulness training!). I.E. even though this isn’t the story we wanted or expected, this is the story that we’ve got. That way I can stop myself adding suffering on top of suffering by pushing back against what is. Hope this makes sense. I wrote a lot about acceptance in my second book. It’s amazing to me how accepting I am of the emotion, too. I’m not wishing to run from it or numb it.. sadness is EXACTLY what I should be feeling right now (as they say, this is the price we pay for love).. and so I’m right to feel sad, and I’m comfortable with that. As sucky and awful and sad as this situation is.. it is happening and there’s no avoiding it. So I’m going to live through it. Doing lots of mindfulness, focusing on my breath coming in and out of my body, what my hands are doing and what my eyes can see. Also gratitude – feeling grateful for all I have around me, my loved ones etc. Golly… I really have come a long way with all the work I’ve been doing on myself since I quit drinking!!! Anyhoo.. lovely to see so much warmth and togetherness in the feed. Thanks everyone for being here and bringing your truth and kindness. This site would be nothing without you members.. and with you all it’s a fucking powerhouse of support! Today is a great day to be sober xx
Hi Lotta. Terrible things happen in life and we somehow have to get past them and move on. You’ve mentioned how you will use mindfulness to help you but may I make another suggestion. Those emotions are there for a reason. Allow yourself a set period to experience those emotions, so let them run for a while, but set an end date on them (3 days, 5 days or whatever). Then, at then end of that period close them off with deliberate action… mindfulness is a good one.
Awww @mrs-d I’m so terribly sorry. Acceptance is where it’s at but that doesn’t mean you aren’t going to have some preparatory grief with it knowing most likely the road to come. Many prayers to you and your family during this difficult time as well as positive vibes. My Dad is passing and won’t make it they say more than six months. Even though I know it’s still hard.
Sending you lots of love Lotta. I understand how you are feeling. My mother 74 (in Canterbury) and fit and healthy, was diagnosed with stage 4 (terminal) bowel cancer in July last year. It is life changing, but I have acceptance now, she is doing ok.
Know that i am thinking of you and your family. Lots of Love xx
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