• Mari135 posted a new activity comment 34 minutes ago

    Lucy!!!! oxoxox I am always so very happy to see your face pop up here. I will think of of you, as I always do, while driving to my gym to swim in about half hour. If it hadn’t been for you….I would not have thought of swimming again. And swimming has been a lifeline throughout so much in the last two years. oxoxox Lots of love your way!!!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 36 minutes ago

    Double digits, woot woot!!!! oxxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 36 minutes ago

    And that’s ok. It’s not your fault. oxoxx I had 3-4 of those AFTER I had decided to finally get sober for real. Each hangover day felt like a slap in the face. Anxiety…toxic shame….racing thoughts…. Give yourself extra self-compassion today. You deserve it. oxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 37 minutes ago

    Ohh thanks so very much!!! I’ve missed coming here and I have missed you guys. A LOT. oxoxoxoxo LOVE the battery metaphor….funnily enough, when I read the email notification from your reply on my phone….my battery WAS empty…both the phone and myself…..Throw in a weekend filled with self-care….a deep tissue massage…..walks in nature…sleeping in….tea…..watching some mindless Dwayne Johnson Action Movie…..and life seems very different. Thank you for being here. oxxox You bring so much to this space!!!!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 39 minutes ago

    Ohh thanks so much morgan!!! Thank YOU for being the relentless and absolutely compassionate companion here on this forum. It would not be the same space without you here. oxoxoxox I am looking forward to more quotes from you, and posts about life. I have learned so much from you, and have no doubt I will continue to do so. oxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 40 minutes ago

    And I love that you’re back full force! That’s what I love about this forum. People give themselves permission to come and leave, to stay, to pause, and that is what unconditional support looks like. It is about YOU. No expectations from others. YOUR healing and YOUR needs come first. oxoxoxox I can post here, or take a break. But I know I can always come back….and that has helped me stay sober, and to not forget that self-care matters. High five to you!! I am rather chuffed with us. Look at all that hard work to heal….holy shit! xxoxoxoxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 41 minutes ago

    oxoxoxo The show is amazing. Hard to watch at times but so so raw. I got a lot out of it. So glad to see you here too!!! xoxooxxox I’ve missed you guys.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 42 minutes ago

    And I missed your posts!!! Finally catching up and bringing back self-care to my life after a few weeks of work-nonstop. Phew. Breathing….expanding…..living in the moment. I missed that. And the morning coffee-LivingSober-time. oxoxo Hope your weekend was, and continues to be, all you needed it to!!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 43 minutes ago

    Darn it, clicked post and then realized I wanted to acknowledge that you like your new therapist, which is HUGE! You deserve to have the right people on your team. oxoxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 43 minutes ago

    JM, thanks so very much for this!!! You sweet sweet soul you. I am lucky to get to be here alongside you. oxoxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 44 minutes ago

    Oh how I love this……I am trying to remind myself to wait until the morning before making decisions these days, or even to think about issues. The morning voice and energy can be trusted. HALT is very real. I would like to get better at that. oxoxoxo Thanks a lot for the reminder!!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 45 minutes ago

    Ohhh loving every bit of this. You deserve it all and then some!!! oxox Had a deep tissue massage yesterday myself…utter bliss!!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 47 minutes ago

    Thank YOU for being here. I learn so much from your posts and always love when I have time to really sit down and read them. oxoxoxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 48 minutes ago

    You so got this. oxxoxoxoxoxo Can’t wait for the book!!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 52 minutes ago

    oxoxoxo You’re a very very good mom. They will remember the love, and you giving up drinking is a loving act for them and yourself. You got this.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 53 minutes ago

    50 days, legend!!!! oxoxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 54 minutes ago

    Ohh love this!!! @freedom1025 did you see Thor’s update??!! Wish we could all have coffee in Evanston! oxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 57 minutes ago

    oxoxox So so good to see an update from you!!!!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 57 minutes ago

    I am really sorry for your loss Ro oxooxxoxox That is too young to die. 🙁

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 58 minutes ago

    Way to go you!!!! oxoxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 5 minutes ago

    Almost tripled digits….you keep going over there, one next best step at a time. oxoxoxoxoxox Hugs your way, if you’d like them!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 6 minutes ago

    Day 721. And how I missed reading your updates!!! oxoxoxo Scrolled down the newsfeed and was hoping to see one from you eventually. Lots of love your way!!!! I hope things with the skin treatment are going well. You’re in my thoughts in my daily life over here in the Midwest.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 8 minutes ago

    I am really proud of you for how well you handle all of this. oxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxo You got this. Nothing short of a legend!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 14 minutes ago

    oxoxox So good to see you here Bobby! I hope all is well. Been out of the loop here on the forum for a while and feel like I’ve missed updates on everyone and everything. Lots of love your way!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 21 minutes ago

    Oh God…this post is gold. I remember feeling so ambivalent about hearing people tell me that “I would get better…” that….”this would pass….” ….”That I would not always feel this way…”
    I WANTED to believe them….so badly…..I did…some days I did believe them….Other days though I got angry….at people telling me that shit because I figured that it was true for others, more normal people, but certainly not me. I’d always be the drunk, self-harming, non-career-having broken soul, from a broken family.

    I am so glad “they” were right…things do get better…..it may take time, professional help, more time, setbacks, pulling yourself off of the floor over and over again…..but it doesn’t end there. Life goes on and healing is possible.

    oxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 23 minutes ago

    Hangover free weekend mornings are bliss…aren’t they?! ooxoxo You deserve to have all the bliss in the world.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 25 minutes ago

    Oh my goodness, I totally missed your new profile picture! You gorgeous soul, inside and out. oxoxoxoxo It sounds like you’re in a good place. You deserve to feel that way and much more. oxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 26 minutes ago

    One year!!!!! What a massive milestone that is!! Congratulations!!!!
    oxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 27 minutes ago

    Keep the cigs for as long as you have to, if it helps with staying sober. That can be the next project once you feel grounded in sobriety. I ate my weight (and then some) in sugar…for MONTHS…almost an entire year, really….. which doctors now say is just as bad as drinking/smoking. I needed it or else I would have relapsed. Tug that away for when you feel ready. You so got this. oxoxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 28 minutes ago

    oxoxox You are enough. Way more than enough. And you do enough. oxoxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 30 minutes ago

    60 days…Oh my goodness!!!! Go you! oxoxoxox I love how you got right back up and into that saddle. That’s the way to do it. Took me 4 attempts to stay in the saddle. Keep going! It will be worth it.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 33 minutes ago

    400 days!!! And calmer work-routines ahead. You so deserve all that is good and a job where you have a good work-life balance. oxoxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 34 minutes ago

    Day 822 and loving-parenting left and right. You’re a legend, Ro! Nothing short of that. oxoxoxoxox Thinking of you and your girl as she is headed for another surgery soon.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 35 minutes ago

    Day 41 and so many good reminders….of self-care…very timely as that’s what I need to do as well….pacing and more time to walk…a quiet weekend….oxoxoxo Thanks heaps for sharing!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 36 minutes ago

    Ohh thanks heaps for sharing her post, morgan!!!! oxoxo I love you both and miss you!!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 38 minutes ago

    97 days….three days to the big triple digits, you legend you! oxoxox And you have my sincere compassion for the depression-wave hitting. Been there, done that. I will be there again in the future. Just know you’re not alone and it won’t feel like this forever. These waves suck donkeyballs but they pass…they always pass. It sounds like you have very clear thoughts and also perspective. Trust yourself. Give yourself permission to do what you need to do. oxoxox It will feel lighter again soon, I promise.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 40 minutes ago

    8 days. Boom! oxoxox

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 40 minutes ago

    Ohhh 5 weeks!!! Legend!! tell Port Douglas hello from me and if you have the chance do a snorkelling day-trip to Opal Reef….Most precious place on earth. I loved Port Douglas and everything around it. oxxxoxoxo

    • Never been before – always wanted to – have a few excursions planned – apparently I will be packing very different clothes from those to Melbourne – goodness might even have to use the iron – that happens once every four to five years or so 😀

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 41 minutes ago

    oxoxoxo Give yourself permission to not have all the answers just yet, and to let the question mark sit there calmly next to you for as long as it needs to be. It’s ok to not have all the answers, to feel sad, to feel scared, unsure, conflicted, and ambivalent. It means you’re a normal human being with feelings. You got this and you will be ok. You have my compassion for your marriage-feelings. I have been in a similar boat for a while and tried couples counseling, with little success. Right now I just take every day as it comes. No pressure, no “should-ing” myself. Just know you’re not alone, and others feel it too. They have in the past, they do right now, and in the future there will always be others who end up asking themselves the same questions you do right now, and who go through similar feelings and experiences. oxoxox It’s not your fault. You’re not going to feel like this forever.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 2 hours, 50 minutes ago

    Healing is a process, and often not a single event. It takes times and often turns and re-turns. And that is ok and normal. ooxoxox I am so glad you’re here! And I love reading your updates. It’s been too long since I had time here to catch up with everyone and your name is always one I scan for when I scroll down the newsfeed. oxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 2 hours, 51 minutes ago

    Day 1. Good to have you back! oxoxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 2 hours, 52 minutes ago

    One week finishing up and self-care taking place in the form of meditations. Way to go! oxoxox I love Tara’s work and listen to her every week.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 2 hours, 52 minutes ago

    We will be here for you anytime you need someone, all along the way. oxoxoxoxo You got this. Preparing is the best way to protect your sobriety I have come to find. If I anticipate triggers and plan accordingly, it still can be difficult at times but at least I am not attacked out of the blue without a warning. Our brains like to be warned I think. oxoxoxox High five, you got this.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 2 hours, 54 minutes ago

    90 days coming up so soon…..Look at you go! oxoxoxo One of the biggest things I learned when I got sober was that life will still have shit moments. It will be gritty. Or boring. Or both. And many other things. But when sober, we show up for it all. I also no longer (for the most part) falsely believe that something is wrong when I have a hard day or week or month. Those are part of life and need not to be boozed away.

    oxoxox

    Keep going, you’re doing great!!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 2 hours, 55 minutes ago

    Day 7 and running the morning, way to go you!! oxoxox Having all that extra time for sleep, healthy activities, chores, etc. was a surprise to me as well once I put down the bottle. You don’t realize how much drinking-and-recovering takes up in terms of energy, health, and time.

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 2 hours, 58 minutes ago

    Day 58 and so many good things all around…You deserve to feel good, look good, and experience joy-filled peace-moments. oxoxox A gift you are giving yourself. High five!

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 3 hours ago

    Day 3!!! High five. Getting through the weekend can be the hardest portion of the week, and you did it. Way to go! oxoxoxx

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 3 hours ago

    Six months is an amazing milestone, way to go you!!!!! oxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 3 hours, 1 minute ago

    Loved reading this, Frog. Very very insightful. I need alone time as well and thrive when I get my two plus days in a row on weekends to unwind and kind of go with what my body and soul need. I used to ignore that and drink that need away. oxoxoxo

  • Mari135 posted a new activity comment 3 hours, 3 minutes ago

    73 days!!! Way to go Lucy!!! You were one of those special people who reached out to me (I am pretty sure you commented on my very first post, actually, and many many after that.) And you were also the one who gently pointed out that us addicts want a quick fix and are impatient and want it now. Instant gratification. I took that lesson with me throughout all those months since. Reminding myself of the wisdom you shared and continue to share here. I am just so glad you’re back!!! I missed you while you took a break from the forum. Give yourself a big fat pat on the shoulder. This is not an easy thing to do. oxoxox One time when I lapsed I kept drinking for a good year. That was before I even read Mrs. D’s book. It was not a single event like it seems for some people. My sobriety was a process and took time, and I can see so much of myself in your posts and how you stopped. Thanks for being here!!! oxoxox It’s people like you that make me want to come back and continue to be a part of this community. Have a lovely Sunday!!

    • I did reply on your 1st post I remember it well. I was drawn to you (still am).. thank you for the lovely reply xxx

  • Load More