• Lucy posted a new activity comment 1 hour, 8 minutes ago

    I’m smoking far too much @jennah but its keeping my kind of sane in my early sobriety.. well done to you and congrats on 40 days x

  • Lucy posted an update 2 hours, 31 minutes ago

    @leslielily I know you’ll be asleep now or just getting up but just to say your doing so well.. read your posts, great your doing something new sobriety is definitely working for you xx

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 hours, 5 minutes ago

    What a wonderful adventure @Aria. Sounds absolutely wonderful. x

  • Lucy posted an update 4 hours, 8 minutes ago

    Not sure how I’m feeling today, can’t put my finger on but feel edgy and a bag of nerves. Yesterday I was high on a pink cloud that didn’t last long. I hope there will be more though, really enjoying the book ” the unexpected joys of being sober” … very funny and helpful, I love being sober and not craving a drink at all but I think it’s just life pissing me off. The school holidays are dragging now and I need my Mondays back for me time.. Husband is still off work after he shoulder op and getting under my feet ( bless him). We all went swimming early this morning and grateful for this because if still on the booze it would never have happened, I’d be up and feeling like death warmed up!! Willing the clock round so’s I could get a wine and feel better.. thing is I never felt better just back in that vicious circle of illness, mentally and physically.. I’m now having a diet coke and cooking a roast dinner (loving my food).. will have an easy night with self care number one In my priority.. keep going everyone.. oh and @aprilsfool how are you today?? xx

    • @Lucy, I remember the challenges of keeping my daughter busy for two months every year, it can be exhausting. A family swim sounds wonderful. I am always grateful my mother insisted we all learn to swim well. Swimming can be an absolute joy!

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 hours, 24 minutes ago

    Your mom would be very proud of you @wakingowl, what a beautiful tribute..” finding your own healing journey” I love this to in fact I’m going to write this down and put it on my fridge… still going to google Three Sisters Sanctuary .. when I get chance.. take care and keep standing up for yourself. xx

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 hours, 36 minutes ago

    I personally don’t touch zero booze at all, I have done in the past but it took me back to drinking.. thought it would help the cravings but my mind told me different.. also cooking with alcohol is a no no.. at the moment ( only 2 months in).. I’m over careful at the moment because I don’t want to go back.. I did AA but it wasn’t for me but fantastic for others.. I read lots of sober books, and then I re read them.. a huge well done for a year sobriety… fab x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 hours, 41 minutes ago

    congrats to you. x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 hours, 42 minutes ago

    Stay feeling positive @michael6, there is nothing in this world that a drink will fix.. your doing good.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 hours, 44 minutes ago

    Hello @brisbane-kiwi and welcome.. Lots of times I’ve drank again after really bad drunken times. I’d stop for a while then the addictive brain kicks in. The last time I thought enough is enough.. Hope you stay here and post often, the support is outstanding.. and I agree with the others see a doctor to..

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 hours, 4 minutes ago

    Well done a huge change isn’t it being sober. When I had trouble with a work person he drinks every evening and put awful things on FB… everyone knew he was drunk but I just ignored it and stayed calm… not the case if I’d have been drinking.x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 hours, 8 minutes ago

    I’m in the UK @laurali.. wish I was in New Zealand though lol. x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 hours, 9 minutes ago

    Hello and welcome to Living Sober.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 hours, 10 minutes ago

    Good to read your feeling better.. catch ya later, have great day x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 6 hours, 18 minutes ago

    Hope your day is good x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 22 hours, 49 minutes ago

    I’m just off up to bed @Mandles.. sleep well and have a great day tomorrow.. x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 1 day, 1 hour ago

    There you are @Mandles I missed you… so great your back posting and doing brilliantly…. I can’t bear pissed people anymore lol.. what a turn around.. congrats 60 days. xx

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 1 day, 1 hour ago

    Hi @aprilsfool, you have kept all this in for 43 years, my lovely it needs to come out at sometime.. I could cry for you because that’s how I feel sometimes,, “hold it all in”. .” A drink will make it go away”, “Be strong woman for godsake, you have more to control and sort out” and on and on. It’s like you went on to auto pilot when your parents passed and you had to survive.. Fear also is a trigger to, the more we drink the braver we get and lock our emotions away and all this just gets worse.. Could you not talk to a therapist or just someone to sound off at.. I think working through this is nessersary (if you want to) to move on with your sobreity. I’m just learning that and I’m nearly 50, age doesn’t matter here.. you’ve been sober 6 months, that is fantastic… look how strong you are and your post has touched me.. anytime I can help just shout … lots of love.. anyway I’ve always wanted to go to New York haha I could pop over.x

  • Lucy posted an update 1 day, 1 hour ago

    Today day 66 and I feel the pink cloud looming. I’m going embrace this so strong, feeling so happy and not finding fault with anything ( a 1st for me) !! Still enjoying the exercising and off swimming in the morning.. excited about this because my husband (who doesn’t usually move far) and son want to come with me. Step daughter away at her nan and grandads but looking forward to this becoming a family thing. Not holding my breath though all could change in morning and telling myself not to be disappointed if it does, I will still go and really enjoy it. Usually at this time on a Sunday 6.30pm I’d be totally sozzled, I’d drink when I got in from work because I “deserved it” then drink while cooking the dinner then totter off for a shower take wine upstairs with me so it’s at hand when I get out, to “Relax Me”.. it’s all bullshit really because I’d be vile. Bad tempered picking fault with everything/one.. drinking and drinking and moaning” I have to do everything here”.. Well since getting sober everything/one is calm, we all help out with chores and we laugh, really laugh, genuine laughter.. can’t beat this.. even the dog is happy lol.. think he’s surprised how nice I’m being I usually yell at him to get out of my effing way.. So we have a lot of new members and that’s great, just to say keep going yes days will be tough but waking up sober is heavenly .. feeling great in yourself , seeing a difference in your skin, clear eyes, shiny hair… once again being sober is amazing, don’t give up. xx

    • Winner replied 1 day ago

      Awesome work! So true. ❤️

    • So happy for you Lucy, very happy for you all and it’s so cool even the dog is appreciating this new shiny happy healthy you xxx

    • Way to go, your doing amazing..l I know what you mean about the tottering. It certainly doesn’t relax us…. we are going to try to get up to go to the gym/swimming in the morning so going for an early night tonight. Have a nice evening xxx

    • Great post Lucy hope you have a great swim with or without the lads 🏊

    • Hi Lucy! I am pink clouding at the moment too! Felt so flat and blah the week prior to our vacation last week, and so sick of being sad that I can’t manage to moderate alcohol. Going on vacation and exploring, walking a lot, being with my family and going to be sober/waking up refreshed through all of that really lifted my spirits! This week my husband was home all week (normally an excuse to drink a bunch) and instead both of us were sober all week, he didn’t even drink this weekend (he usually at least has a beer or two), and right now I am feeling quite joyful to no longer be drinking! Glad you are feeling it too <3

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 2 days, 3 hours ago

    Thank you @julianna.. I always worry about my weight was bashed Into me from childhood.. need to let this go xx

    • @Lucy. I had an eating disorder when I was younger and still deal with some eccentric eating now many years later. It was painful for me to give up trying to keep strict control of my eating, but essential to do when I was getting sober. So for me, it is an important tip to give people. Not everyone needs it, but just in case…. I’m sorry you have long term worries about weight too. It occupies a lot of mental space for me, but I’m sort of resigned to that, like having arthritis or something. I just have to work around it.

  • Lucy posted an update 2 days, 4 hours ago

    My book has just arrived “The joys of being sober” can’t wait to get stuck into that. I read so much now and I love sober books, keeps me on track. Also loving this new life of sobriety, it’s Saturday and have been out with my Husband we are kid free today/night. Bought a curry for dinner lots of nice treats for our movie night ( we have The Mule for tonight ), it’s nice to watch a film and stay awake and not pretend I’m sober or watch it through one eye trying to steady the TV. Trying to get my head around not eating so much sweet stuff but not doing so well at the moment, but I’m sober and finally happy (with myself) . Just been my walk and thought to myself if I was still in that awful place of alcohol ruling my life I would be counting the minutes to drink time, cutting the walk short and getting back to open the 1st bottle. I would have been drunk by 4pm and not stopping until I blacked out.. Not seen the movie, hadn’t eaten the lovely meal and would have wobbled to bed and woke up feeling shit!! No alcohol is not for me at all.. I can’t control it.. it controls me and ruins my life.. I will keep going.. and with all your support so thank you all. xx

    • Try not to worry about treat eating, because If it helps you, that’s the right thing to do for now. I had to discipline myself to let go of food worries at the beginning of giving up wine, but it was really important for my alcohol struggle. Now after 2 1/2 years, I don’t drink and I’ve lost 15 pounds gradually. I did step up exercise, but not anything huge, just walking, tennis and swimming more often. You are doing really well @Lucy!

      • Thank you @julianna.. I always worry about my weight was bashed Into me from childhood.. need to let this go xx

        • @Lucy. I had an eating disorder when I was younger and still deal with some eccentric eating now many years later. It was painful for me to give up trying to keep strict control of my eating, but essential to do when I was getting sober. So for me, it is an important tip to give people. Not everyone needs it, but just in case…. I’m sorry you have long term worries about weight too. It occupies a lot of mental space for me, but I’m sort of resigned to that, like having arthritis or something. I just have to work around it.

    • Ah yes, so many movies I have “watched” over the years but don’t remember. As my sister would say…just remember “desserts” is just “stressed” spelled backwards. Getting sober and doing the work is stressful as well as having our bodies screaming for those lost carbs. You’re hanging tight and doing a great job!

    • Sober life definitely sounds better @lucy !!

    • Thank you for this post, Lucy. It could have been written about me…I totally get it, especially the watching a movie through one wobbly half-open eye. We watched the Lord of the Rings trilogy again recently (don’t know how many times I have watched it before) but this was the first time I understood what was happening and what it was all about! LOL…because I was sober this time round. It was a real Aha moment! Sounds like you are doing great!

    • Fill us in on that book please @Lucy. I’ve heard good things about it. It’s time for me to get a few new ones as well.

    • Atta girl xx

    • Good for you@Lucy! There are many expensive dinners I’ve forgotten I’ve eaten or I’ve experienced twice in a not so good way. Glad you can remember your curry.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 3 hours ago

    Hi @Prudence good to hear from you.. have a lovely weekend.x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 3 hours ago

    Keep checking in and keep posting @JJR.. sorry your struggling I know it’s so hard but life is life and much better handled sober.. I never thought that, I thought I functioned well drunk but really its just all a lie.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 3 hours ago

    Bloody well done @suzkep.. that is so good.. I just posted it great to read now as I’m sober and the words all make sense lol.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 3 hours ago

    I work in a supermarket @MaryB and it’s thrust at us in every space they can put it. Advertised constantly to make it look glamourous .. well it wasn’t like that for me.. awful times drinking to blackout every night.

    • There’s nothing glamorous about poison, I’d like to see it treated like cigarettes available if you want it cos some people do not have a problem with it but hidden and only available at certain times. Maybe then it would not seem to be so acceptable. Now I sound old but I know how difficult it is at the end of a shop when you are tired and looking forward to loading it all in your car then going home and putting it all away (!!!!!!) to just treat yourself to one bottle “cos I deserve it”. End of vent take care @Lucy.😼😼

      • Sounds like a fellow -I hate grocery shopper- to me.god I hate that job..always need a treat after it…I’ve put on a kilo since not drinking…treat…treats and more treats…oink oink I say!

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 3 hours ago

    You will get there @craftygirl.. don’t give up, we all have our own ways of coping and if it’s a hard week it can be very tough.. keep going.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 3 hours ago

    Thank you @LauraLi x

  • Lucy posted an update 3 days, 5 hours ago

    Its Friday and I’ve just finished work, not even thought about racing home to have a drink,, feel so much more in control today. My mum is changing with her dementia and is getting very arsey.. not like her at all.. did upset me this week but today just went with it I didn’t think “oh for christ sake I need a drink “. A good night lined up.. a delicious meal sorted with my tonic and lime and cant wait to get comfy in my pjs and watch the TV.. reading books is great now as dont try and pin point the words as they all blend into 1 and have to re read a chapter again cause I’m to pissed to see it… day 64 and not giving up.. x

    • Sounds delightful, @lucy.

    • I’m sorry your mum is struggling <3
      Sounds like a great evening planned. I felt the same way going home from work yesterday. I used to be in such a hurry to get home for a drink, so much so, sometimes I'd get one for the ride home! (its a 15 minute commute, but would need to stop at the store sometimes, delaying my arrival home)
      Yesterday on my merry way home, I stopped to have the oil changed in my car, totally relaxed and happy to be having it done.
      Well done on 64 days! Keep on reaching for the stars @lucy

    • ah @Lucy so sorry to hear that. I work with dementia patients and day to day you never know what mood you’ll encounter and it can make people just plain mean when they’d always been pleasant. A comfy evening at home sounds like a good game plan. congrats on 64 days! you are doing this!

    • Hi Lucy, I’ve been really enjoying reading your posts and have been meaning to comment. Sorry to hear about your lovely mum. It’s so difficult to see your parents changing and deteriorating. Just wanted to say congrats on 64 days! Big hugs. I’m on 67 days and so chuffed. We’re doing it together with all these awesome people around us xx

    • Life is definitely better without booze. Even the difficult days are easier to face head on. Sorry to here about your mum Lucy, I hope you had a relaxing weekend <3

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 5 hours ago

    Great stuff.. not for me anymore either x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 23 hours ago

    hello and welcome.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 23 hours ago

    That’s amazing.. bloody well done.x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 23 hours ago

    Sounds like my story @newstart100, I’ve had to change the way I look and feel about alcohol.. get more excersize, meditation and I focus every morning how great I feel. All the times i went back everyday for more and more bottles of booze and I really argued with myself this is not how I want my life to be.. viscious circle.. we can break free, just keep going.. love to you.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 3 days, 23 hours ago

    Sounds like a perfect evening, I love it. x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 days ago

    Your doing better than me @MissBennet.. just devoured large peice of carrott cake and cream. My sugar craving is horrndous just lately so well done to you.. hope your head gets better soon.

  • Lucy posted an update 4 days ago

    I was thinking about my drinking days today and how full of shame and guilt and just feeling so trapped in my head. Everyday was a constant battle with ” I’m only having 2 drinks tonight”.. “I’ve had a shit day so I’m entitled to a bottle of wine”.. ” Am I an alcoholic”… “I’m shattered so a drink will pep me up”. Round and round everyday bloody day.. Exhausting and draining, I have to keep focusing on how bad I felt day in day out to now 63 days into sobriety and just big changes and feeling happier with myself. Last night I cooked dinner for my step daughter and her 1st boyfriend.. a big step for me as when drinking I’d be pissed and loud and over the top.. or I wouldn’t have even had him in the house because it would have interfered with my “relaxing” time. Now I enjoy family time and life in general, I just hope and pray I never let the wine witch talk me round like she has done in the past.. Need to stay strong here…. love to all. x

    • Hi @Lucy! Well done on 62 days!! It’s amazing how life opens up in sobriety. I bet your stepdaughter really appreciated that. xo

    • @Lucy your posts just always always always remind me of my own story. I played all the same games every day. Or if I had a day of not drinking – like ONE day – I was patting myself on the back “see? You’re not an alcoholic! You’re fine!” But what a struggle it was those nights I didn’t drink and boy looking back I just can’t believe how much mental time and energy I WASTED thinking about and rationalizing my drinking. It is so so so much better to be present in the moment and not lost in an addicted brain. Day 50 for me, right behind ya! <3

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 days, 1 hour ago

    So great to read this @Soberbrightongirl, being at the gym early and no hangover .. you did it well done.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 days, 1 hour ago

    I used to think I drank because I’m tired and it will wake me up.. so I drank and drank until I blacked out.. really worked for me!!!

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 4 days, 1 hour ago

    Sending healing over to your little girl.. hope she gets better soon.. well done 50 days. xx good going

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 days ago

    Hi @betsy19.. welcome.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 days ago

    Welcome to living sober @erin623.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 days, 2 hours ago

    @wildchild your story has made me feel stronger thank you. x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 days, 2 hours ago

    And you have come far @Lee, just keep doing what works for you because this is so tough,, honestly I could drink, the thing keeping me going is this site and you wonderful people, who really understand and support.. I’m proud of you lovely lady. x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 days, 5 hours ago

    A whole week.. well done you.. your getting stronger. x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 days, 5 hours ago

    I understand this @craftygirl, people pleasing because we have always done it. Now were sober it’s time for us to really take time for us.. I get flash backs about things said and done when I was drinking and the guilt creeps in and makes me sad. But this has happened and we need to look forward.. getting stronger everyday were not drinking. I’ve done the making amends and I felt it wasn’t the right time for me as I rushed it and I didn’t feel honest, I found the only person to make amends to was myself 1st.. the better we feel, more confident and we have forgiven our past then time to look at others.. Your doing so well,, take care of you 1st. . you deserve to be happy when we get our head around that, things look different.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 5 days, 5 hours ago

    Hi @tgrim I know about 15 year old girls, hormones all over the place. My step daughter has her boyfriend coming over later for dinner lol, she’s cleaned all the house without me even asking, so I’m happy. I find myself more calmer with both kids since I ditched the booze but they do upset me easily now where as before I’d flare up. But it’s all good.

  • Lucy posted an update 5 days, 23 hours ago

    Was just going to lurk this evening but wanted to say hi and send you all love and support. Another sober day nearly done.. off to bed soon as another early start tomorrow.. day 61…. keep going everyone.. x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 6 days ago

    I thought autumn is coming this morning when I went out to car early.. I’m in the midlands @Hortihoney.. day 9 well done.

    • Hi Lucy. I’m in Norfolk East Anglia. Thankfully it warmed up😁😁. Just as well as I work outside! Thank You!

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 6 days ago

    I get this @Lightness I got to 18 months once and thought sod it I’m having a drink.. but I went exactly back to square one. Couldn’t moderate like I thought and the depression returned along with hang overs, horrible nights drunk and guilt, shame and remorse. It is a struggle yes to stay sober as it looks so normal and it’s everywhere. Ignore those voices you are doing so well.. treat yourself you deserve it x

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 6 days ago

    Hi and welcome here.. great site for support.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 6 days ago

    Hi and welcome.

  • Lucy posted a new activity comment 6 days ago

    Well done Peter, we all get the jitters and think a drink will help, my mum was vile to me today (she’s 82 and has dementia is in a care home), the first thing I wanted was a bloody big vodka when I got home but sent husband out for fish and chips and I had a coke. The feeling has passed and I’m so glad I didn’t buckle. Keep going. x

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