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  • Lee@ posted an update 2 weeks, 2 days ago

    I am curiously sad today. Maybe it’s a result of having worn myself down after trying to fix my entire world within a weeks time. It’s likely that, and also the lack of self care, while fixing the world takes up a huge amount of time leaving much less of it for the things that I really ought to be doing. It’s so easy to forget about the small things, the important ones, that add up to something big. I know that this is my addicted voice popping in with it’s ridiculous demands for immediate rewards. I want so badly to be pass this point, to be well and free and to not have to deal with this cave like part of life, it sometimes feels like I have created for myself. It’s not always this way and that’s exactly what I need to keep telling my own self. I AM working towards a much better better way of life and I HAVE made much progress. This negative voice is a complete hoax and I must take action in order to shut it down. It wants me to expel all of my energy into the current impossible but often times less equals more. I will be kind to myself today instead, and let this pass.

    • I don’t know what to say except that you express yourself incredibly well!

    • Great awareness there Lee.
      Slow and steady wins the race (said the tortoise to the hare)

      • Slow and steady with a belly full of chocolate and pizza @prudence. Not the healthiest form of self care, it’s more like self who cares on the dietary end but with no fuss or mess to clean. I’m actually feeling much better.

    • keep on, @lee-2.

      • Thanks @kitten. I would not know what else to do, really. Going to far backwards would be insane. I don’t want anything to do with the old drinking lifestyle. It was empty and sick. I just recently became to tightly wound somehow and let my own self expectations rule me. I am where I am and can’t think myself out of it and if I look at the entire picture it’s not bad at all but I’d stopped doing that. I really do know why I drank so much now. This mind does not stop!

        • @lee-2, i remember wrapping myself up in all of the feelings of not measuring up because of all the time that i wasted drinking. Really go back to that rotten poison or keep moving forward and through all of those feelings. Love hearing how you move through it.

    • Yes you have made some serious progress @lee-2! Don’t listen to that negative voice because you are right, it’s a hoax. Don’t let that voice rob you of all you have accomplished. You are doing great. Some self care is in order. Be kind to yourself.

    • Yes. Be kind to yourself. Know that this too shall pass. We’re with you.

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