I am curiously sad today. Maybe it’s a result of having worn myself down after trying to fix my entire world within a weeks time. It’s likely that, and also the lack of self care, while fixing the world takes up a huge amount of time leaving much less of it for the things that I really ought to be doing. It’s so easy to forget about the small things, the important ones, that add up to something big. I know that this is my addicted voice popping in with it’s ridiculous demands for immediate rewards. I want so badly to be pass this point, to be well and free and to not have to deal with this cave like part of life, it sometimes feels like I have created for myself. It’s not always this way and that’s exactly what I need to keep telling my own self. I AM working towards a much better better way of life and I HAVE made much progress. This negative voice is a complete hoax and I must take action in order to shut it down. It wants me to expel all of my energy into the current impossible but often times less equals more. I will be kind to myself today instead, and let this pass.
Slow and steady with a belly full of chocolate and pizza @prudence. Not the healthiest form of self care, it’s more like self who cares on the dietary end but with no fuss or mess to clean. I’m actually feeling much better.
Thanks @kitten. I would not know what else to do, really. Going to far backwards would be insane. I don’t want anything to do with the old drinking lifestyle. It was empty and sick. I just recently became to tightly wound somehow and let my own self expectations rule me. I am where I am and can’t think myself out of it and if I look at the entire picture it’s not bad at all but I’d stopped doing that. I really do know why I drank so much now. This mind does not stop!
@lee-2, i remember wrapping myself up in all of the feelings of not measuring up because of all the time that i wasted drinking. Really go back to that rotten poison or keep moving forward and through all of those feelings. Love hearing how you move through it.
Yes you have made some serious progress @lee-2! Don’t listen to that negative voice because you are right, it’s a hoax. Don’t let that voice rob you of all you have accomplished. You are doing great. Some self care is in order. Be kind to yourself.