I live on the West Coast of the US with my Husband and 2 kids. I am active and enjoy most things that involve the outdoors. I also have been a closet problem drinker. I think the only one who came close to knowing the level of problem I had with alcohol is my husband. He probably didn't know the depth of it. One monday night I was a bit stumbly drunk and just realized that I couldn't keep doing this anymore. I stumbled into the refrigerator and while holding on had a wake up call. I had to get up and go to work the next day. I was almost always hungover, and my body was getting very sick. I can't keep being that Kathryn. I really want to be the Kathryn that can have a drink or two and then stop, but I can't be her either. I am stuck trying to figure out/ struggling to be the Kathryn I can be. 6/8/19
Back again. Last time I was on this site was a bit over a year. I had made it 250 days sober and then blew it. I was totally on top of it for a whole 2 weeks before alcohol began taking control. By 3/4 months I was drinking every day. By 5/6 months I was hiding vodka bottles. I am 3 weeks in and feeling hopeful.