180 days! For those just starting out on this life affirming journey, I can only tell you that it gets easier and easier. I never could have imagined going 6 hours without a drink, let alone 6 months. Have never looked or felt better and there is a joy in my soul that was dead for many years. Thank you all for your support and your stories and your honesty. You all helped me get here.
New Years Eve morning here in Canada. Day 142. What an incredible journey this has been, with many thanks to this group, I am 100% confident that I will never sink back into that black hole again. My first sober Christmas was my best yet, truly in the moment and able to see the love. Full disclosure: A couple of times I had a sip of alcohol, and I hated it. Even a sip affected my body and I loathed that feeling. Damn stuff didn’t even taste good. It was a scary experiment and I was fully aware of the potential dangers, but I am glad I did it. Now I “know” . For me, quitting allowed me to do the messy work, to strip all the layers of pain and grief I had wrapped myself in. I honestly did not know joy, true joy, and hadn’t in years. Now I wake every morning with a sense of peace and sheer bliss at how far I have come, both in sobriety and in living my best life ever. Why would I ever go back? All of the ghosts have been freed, forgiveness granted, only delightful possibilities remain. Not numbing that shit! 🙂 Sorry, for the long post, but you have all become an integral part of my days and your journeys have made mine easier. Happy New Year to all of you.
Me too! Almost 5 months and the thing that amazes me is how the redness on my arms has gone. People used to ask me if I was sunburned. Never realized it was from all the wine! Also, oddly enough, my nose looks years younger 🙂
Good day! Though the dog has had me awake most of the night, I am still in a joyful mood. Day 100. Holy sh#t, I never thought I could go 100 hours without wine. Congrats to me and everyone here. Have a wonderful AF day.
Two 100 day posts in a row, you and @Winner. Well done, Jane. I’ve read in a few places where 100 days is the sign of someone who has a great chance of success. Feel the pride. Hope you both have a little celebration planned.
Good morning all, well at least good morning for some of us. Good evening to the rest. 90 freaking days today. I never thought I could make it 90 hours without wine, let alone 90 days. I have never felt this good in my adult life. I find myself singing and dancing a lot. Cooking up a storm and sometimes just sitting and contemplating joy. Man, do I ever sleep well! All of the grief and sorrow that kept me a drunk has lifted. I know this is a lifelong battle and I must remain vigilant, but I also know I am not prepared to go back. This is the life I dreamed of and never knew I could achieve. Thank you dear friends for your posts, your words of encouragement and of inspiration. Here is to all of us, no matter where we are on this journey. xoxoxo
90 days!!! Way to go janetv!! Massive milestone right there!! And love hearing about all of the sober benefits you are already noticing, like that good sleep…..oh bliss eh?! oxoxox Here is to the next 90. Make sure to treat yourself to something good today. Maybe a deep tissue massage, or a new book….or a scented candle and some flowers….the message to yourself is: You matter.
May have just found the best way to continue AF. We are now living with the most adorable little Chihuahua. Not a breed I would normally be attracted to but he is so cute. I couldn’t have kept him when I drank. If I stumbled or tripped I could kill him! He will force me to exercise more, to be in the moment and just enjoy cuddling him. He deserves an attentive and loving mom for the 3 months I have him. So, need further incentive? Get a dog 🙂 Thinking of all of you.
Thank you Mrs. D. Day 68 for me, and so much of that is because of you and this site. Just logged in as it is a bad night, and seeing your post was a good reminder of why I am doing this. Thanks to all.
Tee hee, tomorrow is day 60. My first thought was “Can I celebrate with a glass of wine?” I laughed and moved on. Thank you to all of you, and especially Mrs. D for helping me get this far. I have found comfort/solace and joy in your words.
I am learning to agree with @SharonT on this one. Day 57 and I have experienced a few days like you have. Now realizing it isn’t missing the wine, it is learning an entire new set of skills and perspectives and “ways to live” now. Hard work to be sure. The overthinking, I believe, is that you now CAN think, clearly. That opens a lot of doors that my have been shut tight for a long time. It also opens a shit load of new ones 🙂
Good for you! I am sure that was hard, but you did it. Please don’t say you don’t deserve your family’s caring and support. You deserve that and more. Sleep well knowing you made it through another one.
Day 40. Wow. In some ways this has been easier than I imagined, only in that I could never imagine it. I feel and look so much better. My family is so proud and clearly enjoy spending time with me now. Have not saved the $800 as calculated, primarily due to the increase in healthy food costs and the cost of AF beer (I was a wino so not concerned about that) . I was literally malnourished and “healthy” food is so much more expensive! So congrats to me and to all of you on this journey. I read your posts daily and have truly found inspiration and support here.
Day 40 and eating better and feeling better…..way to go!! oxoxox I can relate to a lot of things you wrote about….because I used to never bat an eye when I bought a wine bottle for $10-20 but don’t ask me to buy organic fruits and veggies….took me some time to turn that around and view food as a nourishing source of things my body needs and deserves.
You are on your way. Take it all in! You deserve to feel safe and healthy and good.
Yes! I am having an unexplained grumpy day today too! Absolutely no thoughts of wine but just feeling grrrr at the moment – no reason for it… just grrr…. I’m at day 113 and find these days pop up every now and then… however, today I had the realisation that these are great days to do a declutter – you can be a lot more brutal with what goes… so today I am owning the grrrr and getting stuff done… grr days pass and tomorrow will be brighter 🙂
ps, you’ll probably find that as time goes by the grrr days get less and less and further apart… seemed to have a little run of them as well at about the month stage and havent had one for ages until today 🙂
Hi @janetv it happens, but I am sure the cranky feeling is still not as bad as a hangover with feelings of shame and disgust in ourselves. Do some self spoiling and pampering. I try to dismiss grumpy feelings as soon as possible. I even stand in front of a mirror and smile at myself and tell myself I am awesome. Good luck.
Hello all. A beautiful and soon to be hot day in Toronto. It dawned on me last night that my sorrow is “gone”. For 6-7 years I lived with deep grief and loss and like many of you, I drank to mask the pain. Now on day 34, I no longer feel it. Of course it hasn’t really gone away, it just has no power over me anymore. Drinking, in fact, was making it so very much worse. I have been working hard on letting it go, forgiving myself and everyone else. Moral of the story? Your deepest pain isn’t helped by alcohol. Only by facing it with a clear head, a full heart and tremendous acts of forgiveness can you ever come to peace. Hang in there friends and thank you for all the support you have provided. It has truly made a difference.
Hey there, congrats on day 34 I really hope and I’m planning to get into the thirties and beyond one day at a time.
I too am working on letting go and accepting that drinking makes things worse in my life and already on day 20 my heart feels fuller and I feel very hopeful.
I’v’e always wanted to go to toronto I live in London. And today I read my gas and electricity metre the provider has been asking me for for over a year .. you see I only tend to this important stuff when I’m sober! And I feel SO PROUD that I’ve provided the metre readings lol ha ha ha it’s the simple things that actually constitute self care because I think I’ve been overcharged for months!
@janetv, I am so happy for you. Forever I have heard that alcohol is indeed a depressant. I have been on medication many of times for just that. Now that I am only a few weeks sober, I no longer feel depressed. I think I was using alcohol to help me cope/mask my depression by self-medicating, but in reality it was contributing.