• hetiheti posted an update 3 weeks, 6 days ago

    @marylourocks hi my day twinnie …. saw your post yesterday but can’t find it to reply … lovely to see a post from you … very quite over the last 9 months but you have been enjoying your sober life full of adventure grandkids etc etc … I haven’t been on very often either .. maybe 2 or 3 times … but oh I remember those early days where this was our safe place, our support base and even our happy place … we just about lived here … we cried but we laughed as well … I could never have done it without all the support from those around us at that time … did you realise we are 1,738 days SOBER … and heading to our 5 years SOBER in August …. wow … we are bloody awesome aye …
    See newbies, we were once celebrating 1 day sober, then 1 week … omg I still remember vividly getting to double figures, 1 month … and cried when I recently found a weight diary from the year before sobriety … what a sad person I was … trying to have AF days and diet … and failing on both accounts … I was depressed fat and unhealthy … sigh!!! now I am 70 … hard not to regret those wasted days and wasted nights (yeh I heard the song lol) but I can’t go there … instead I am grateful to have regained my health, lost 20+ kg and am healthier and fitter than I was in my 50s …. SOBRIETY ROCKS … and we rock too marylou ❤️❤️❤️

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    I love that picture of sober you with your hand on toddlers back, in the dark, knowing you are both safe … that is why we do it.
    So many of us this year reaching our 5 year soberversary … I had my first real, and only to date thankfully, attack heading into my 50th wedding anniversary in March … for weeks I saw a glass of champagne in my hand, Moët bubbles, a long beautiful glass with cold water beads on the outside etc etc … this went on for weeks til I sat down and thought it thru … it was the romance I wanted not the booze … and I got over it.
    Recently after a long discussion about depression with a friend, I was reminded of myself 5 years …. I was so unhappy, so miserable so not me …. then that magic day everything changed … yet nothing changed … I still missed my kids, I still had problems, life continued but I was ok … over the next few years I regained my confidence, my inner strength, my health but best of all my happiness …. and that is why I do it.
    Please find the time to sit down with pen and paper and write to your old self and tell her how good your life is now …. and how much better you feel … and look forward to your 5th soberversary ….. we are a powerful tribe and I am glad I am part of it … big hugs brummiebird xxx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 3 months ago

    DennyD … good to hear that … reading my own post from 6 yrs ago makes me so sad … i also recently found a weight journal of around that time … i was so sad … trying so hard to lose weight but doing it all wrong … having alcohol free nights twice a week thinking i could control my problem that way but alas no … i lived on this site in the early days .. i learnt also that sometimes it was easier to stay home rather than risk it … only you can decide that one … but i remember to this day how good i felt reaching my first 7 days, double digits, first month etc … those milestones became my jewels in a crown so to speak and eventually it became my norm but it was a rollercoaster ride for sure … YES YOU WILL DO THIS and you have an amazing tribe right here for support ….

  • hetiheti posted an update 3 months ago

    Always interested what comes up on my fb memories … forgot about this one from 6 years ago …
    tomorrow i start on a 30-day challenge – thanks to kelly – 30 days of no wine – no bread – no pasta – no processed food – the latter is fine and i can do that BUT no wine for 30 days – so i am putting it up here for all the support i can get – anyone want to join me????? also by putting it here i will have to stick to it eh!!! will keep you posted if you are interested – also let you know of any (hope heaps) weight loss !! wish me luck please!!! …
    Well … i have no memory of whether i lasted the 30 days but i know i didnt lose any weight … if only i discovered the joy of sobriety that time … but it would take about another 18 months before i finally got it … so any newbies, please stay with it … dont derail yourself and waste more time on that booze … now nearly 5 years sober I can honestly hand on heart say it IS THE BEST … oh and by the way i did lose that weight but only when I finally kicked that booze

    • perfectly timed post @hetiheti I could feel my resolve starting to wane. You have inspired me to continue. I have managed a night out earlier this week with family who are big drinkers and had a really great night….sober!!! We are going out with my sister and her husband tomorrow night and we traditionally hit it hard and have a lot of laughs. Really want to go but know I will struggle saying no. I have started back meditating and setting my daily intention to “easily resist the alcohol cravings today and every day”. It has helped so far so hopefully it will continue for tomorrow night.
      I WILL do this.

      • DennyD … good to hear that … reading my own post from 6 yrs ago makes me so sad … i also recently found a weight journal of around that time … i was so sad … trying so hard to lose weight but doing it all wrong … having alcohol free nights twice a week thinking i could control my problem that way but alas no … i lived on this site in the early days .. i learnt also that sometimes it was easier to stay home rather than risk it … only you can decide that one … but i remember to this day how good i felt reaching my first 7 days, double digits, first month etc … those milestones became my jewels in a crown so to speak and eventually it became my norm but it was a rollercoaster ride for sure … YES YOU WILL DO THIS and you have an amazing tribe right here for support ….

    • Pretty powerful post, you got there @hetiheti. Outstanding. xo

    • Fabulous achievement @hetiheti and great of you to pop in and share those thoughts.

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 3 months, 1 week ago

    I love your post … very positive … you can do this xx

  • Hello beautiful sober friends … 1668 days sober … heading into my first 5 years in August … from day one to day 5 when I committed to “forever” I have been comfortable in my sober state … I have belted myself in and ridden that roller coaster, especially in those early days … and discovered I was stronger than I thought I was … I changed my diet and lost lots of weight and became someone I actually am proud of ….
    SO WHY now am I continually thinking about champagne? Thinking of how lovely to pour and hold that gorgeous glass of bubbles? I don’t think it is the champagne itself I am hankering for …. I think it is the romance, the style, the what the fucking hell am I on about at all … I have no idea … it’s our 50th wedding anniversary and we are going on a small road trip spending the night itself at The Hermitage at Mt Cook …. and I think it is that and the special date that the wine witch in my brain is trying to trick my resolve … one would think after all this time I would be free from that witch but no, here she is, popping up to trip me up … and yeh, that glass of champagne in my hand would be quite lovely … I even know that I could stick to that one glass on the night … ok maybe two …. it is special after all …. BUT I also know I would be on top of that slippery slope and we all know where that slope ends up … yeh it might even takes months, maybe only weeks …. but i would end up eventually back where I was 1668 days ago … so NO I will not listen to the wine witch, the lies won’t be listened to … I will enjoy our road trip, our anniversary and precious time spent sober with my man and more importantly with myself …. I will get to my 5 years sober and continue this amazing journey … but yeh it was a surprise that I even ended up thinking like this … goes to show our resolve must stay strong … this too shall pass …. thanks for letting me share ….

    • @hetiheti, congrats on your anniversary, i mean wow!!!!! i am no where near your day count (and congratulations on that) , but my hardest times of resisting do not come from sad, bored, stressed, depressed, but happy, time to celebrate. First day of spring is coming, for example. changing the definition of c e l e b r a t e is taking me some time. be well. good to hear from you.

    • That is so amazing! Keep your eye on the biggest prize 🙂 and don’t listen to that wine witch! 5 years is an amazing achievement! But bigger still is how much you’ve turned your life around 🙂 keep going! You are an inspiration!

    • Shock horror!!! You should have a thimble full and I bet you would find it really yuk. Our tastes change so much, especially you being such a great eater. I have had the odd sip when feeling all FOMO, and truly, the chemical ethanol taste hits first.
      Happy anniversary gorgeous XXXXXXX

    • I get the whole romance part of drinking. How about buying a very nice set of Champaign glasses with 50th anniversary on them. Buying and chilling a bottle of sparking non alcoholic cider and actually like the taste of it and get to admire and recognize your momentous marriage achievement and celebrate your sobriety.

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 4 months, 1 week ago

    Its a great feeling … shout it out xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 4 months, 1 week ago

    Cute … at least it original for sure zx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 4 months, 3 weeks ago

    Shame but no … we kept it up for a long time … might be time to restart again msybe … i do 3 gratitudes every morning … and in the bed i find 3 things to be thankful of for and during that day … and it is true, it helps a LOT

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months ago

    Lovely to treat yourself … and well done with D416 … well deserved xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months ago

    Love it … and i was just teasing … sober4real and another sober warrior has contacted me … at present getting mentor training for a group called Challenge 22+ … all voluntary of course but much better if i know what i am doing i think xx congrats again Mac on it all .
    .

  • @sober4real hi sober4real … if i can help you in any way re plant based lifestyle please fb msg me … fb hetti engelen … would be happy to give you info

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Beautiful Mac … arent we the lucky ones ❤ 1600 days is just so fantastic … what a number aye … and what do you mean only 97% plant based … haha … but so good to hear it is working for you as it did for me … xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Haha … thanks …

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Great to hear …

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Thank you

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Thank you

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Thank you …

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Oh sue … you were my inspiration way back then … you were whst? 5 yrs sober then and i just could not imagine myself there … yet here i am … thank you for your inspiration for so many of us in our early days xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Well done so like me you will be 70 with a good many sober years behind you … our health is worth it for sure

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Thank you

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Awww thank you

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    5th soberversary not til august .. yeh imagine is we had stopped in our 30s or 40s but we didnt and regrets are a waste of time … thank you for the kind wishes

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Thank you

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Not til august xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Way more than bright for sure

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    5th sober birthday … 5th soberversary not til augyst

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    497 days … wow … great to read that you didnt let that slip up derail you … well done

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Thank you … i certainly did xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    I do mean to pop in more often …

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    Exactly … but we mustnt waste too much time on regrets either xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 5 months, 1 week ago

    5th sober birthday … my 5th soberversary not til august

  • I have celebrated my 70th birthday (wow) and my 5th sober birthday …. and my gratitude list starts with …
    I am grateful to be 70 and
    I am grateful for my sobriety …
    They go hand in hand, cause without my sobriety i would not be this picture of health that i am today and i am that because i gave up that booze and went on my journey of health … so today i am healthier and fitter than i was in my 50s.
    So i come on here not to brag, but worried for those struggling and wondering if the journey is worth it all … and i say IT BLOODY WELL IS WORTH IT!
    Dont be like me and wait til you are 65 … do it now … live the life you are meant to live … bright eyed and bushy tailed, eager for each day to begin … not tired weary and forever looking and waiting for that top up to get you going again … it just isnt worth it.
    On the other side of the coin , my life isnt perfect but i live it … i handle it and i cope … the real me is way better than that other version i put up with way too long … so hang in there, be positive and love life
    On that note, happy new year to everyone in this amazing tribe that i am so proud to be a part of …

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 6 months, 2 weeks ago

    It’s a real roller coaster ride sometimes but hang in there … try positive thinking to trick your brain … fake it til you make it … it gets easier just not right now … try to remember why you came here in the first place … cos it is all lies … nothing romantic or special about booze … YOU CAN DO THIS xxx just stay on here as long as it takes … keep reading and keep posting … always someone here to keep you going … think about tomorrow morning and waking up refreshed and happy another day has been added …

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 6 months, 3 weeks ago

    Oh I hate that knot in the tummy thing …. I think the new site has great potential … there will always be a few grumbles as many hate change … and I am sure your poor Dan will iron every thing out in due time … congrats for keeping this amazing site up and running in the first place our beautiful sober warrior leader 😍😍😍😍 great having our emogies back xxx

  • Hello sober warriors on our brand new exciting site … well it will be when they sort out all the probs … I for one am happy it is up and running again …. so I wanted to share a little story … I have had an amazing journey with food health and weight loss over the 4 years I have been sober … and so grateful for it that I often mention it on my plant based vegan sites … have actually had two people from those sites join us here so never be afraid to share … you never know who is listening/reading on the other side … so I end up mentoring a few on their journey but now I am helping a 50-odd year old woman in Canada with a soda-pop addiction …. 4 litres a day …. OMG 😰😰😰😰. It’s weird cos hey it’s not alcohol but the addiction is real … so I am using all the same tools as I used on myself and turning them on her … she is up to day 4 today and struggling so I fb msg her with advice love and humour … a few times a day … she has no trouble with the booze … just soda-pop … ok just wanted to share that cos somehow I find it funny … while I know it’s not funny at all xxx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 6 months, 3 weeks ago

    Same here Bondi … came to tell a quick something and oh no … so happy to see it all back up and runny … poor mrs-d and her computer dan … think they have had a bit of a journey with it all 🤪🤪🤪🤪

    • it has been a bit of a mission, Dan is a legend tho.. responding to everything really quickly even on the weekend.. we are lucky! 🙂

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 6 months, 3 weeks ago

    Click on the top left hand corner and keep tapping til your month and year come up

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 6 months, 3 weeks ago

    Thank you … it worked for me by tapping top left hand corner …. a lot of clicking when over four years hehehe

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 6 months, 3 weeks ago

    Congratulations on our new home … dont come all that often but then when i did try and come on and couldnt … almost had a little panic attack … lol …. anyway will leave that story for another day … lovely to see us all settled here again … welcome to our new site sober warriors ❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    Sorry to hear you not feeling the best …. not sure how I can help … I just strongly believe in a plant based lifestyle … but you have some interesting answers here … hang in there … as you say .. this too shall pass … Kia kaha and big hugs xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    I have completely forgotten who you are in my other site … pm me and say hi sometime so I can put your two names into one … lol

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    Hi Amy ,,, if you in New Zealand the best site is What Kiwi Vegans Eat …. you can fb pm me if you want …. Hetti Engelen xxx and yes a site helps .. I am on my own here as well as my man is still an Omni xxx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    No it is never too late … more important we just change … and the future is so much brighter when sober xxx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    Thanks xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    We all rock on this site … thanks xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    Oh yeh don’t rush it … it comes way too fast all on its own … haha

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    Easy to shine when sober aye … xxxx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    No excuse cos I only cook for myself as well …. pm me if you ever want some help/ideas etc esp for your lethargy … I do a good mix of raw and cooked … sounds like you not having the right nutrients … but hey congrats on going plant based … I think it is amazing lifestyle xx

  • hetiheti posted a new activity comment 7 months, 1 week ago

    It’s good to do each day … sometimes it’s just little things but others really big ones .. but still gratitudes xx

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