Hi @RebeccaAKtoFL – well done on the 3 days! Think the biggest thing I am learning is you can’t control people, places or things – all you can do is change you. I am hearing you on the outside influence issue – still having a little trouble with that myself. But I think in the first instance we really need to do some straight talking with our…[Read more]
My hope this first couple weeks is to be able to avoid social situations and just focus on ways to support getting healthy. Based on past experience (not my first time trying to quit), I know I need to be a little stronger before I talk to my husband. He doesn’t think either of us have a problem. Thank you for sharing with me!
I think it can be quite threatening, if you haven’t come round to the idea that you need to stop yourself. My ex, who was a mean drunk, would NOT even listen to me saying ‘maybe I need to cut down a bit’ cos perhaps that also meant ‘maybe you do too’ and he wasn’t ready to entertain that. (Blimey, I hadn’t realised how long I’d struggled with…[Read more]
Clowance, this is some great advice. It honestly has been a few years since I have tried to quit drinking, so putting a different health spin on it just might do the trick.
From your comment, so glad for you that your ex is your ex and that you have a much more understanding partner now!
I also started this whole thing a few years’ ago and currently on a couple of weeks again, been mostly sober for the last four years but plenty of final research “patches”. Time to admit I don’t need any more research, it messes with my head and ends in trouble. Let’s do this! 🙂
I read something that hit me in the face today, maybe it will resonate with others? It was in Dr Libby’s book The Energy Guide (highly recommend it). She says, “Everything – and I mean everything – comes back to our drive to avoid rejection and obtain, or maintain, love. I don’t know how else to say it. People think the opposite of stressed is…[Read more]
Bang on, in my case, @Flourishing. “that people will love me”…that they will stay around, that there is such a thing as unconditional love … my early life was littered with people who left. It leaves wounds for sure. And yeah, I can look back and see the tracks I’ve made in life…all trying to avoid rejection (or avoid feeling the pain of…[Read more]
Great post @florishing. I am just now discovering the importance of letting go of all of the ideas that you mentioned. It’s freeing and such a relief when you can. The crutch, alcohol, has to be removed first in order to actively pursue any form of such freedoms. The biggest shamble of them all!
I am hearing you on that – one time I relapsed was on a wedding anniversary cause that’s what we used to do together, drink to celebrate anything and everything, a day ending in ‘y’ let’s face it! And I really, really deserved it – yeah right!?? Anyway, now I just really play the tape forward and think about that one glass of wine, where it will…[Read more]
Aw that is really annoying – totally understand the hurt feelings. I have had similar kind of things happen to me. I think rather than worry about it being a like or dislike situation it is simply a matter of them feeling uncomfortable with a non drinker in case they get a bit sloppy drunk. A bit like the old “what goes on tour stays on tour” kind…[Read more]
@pearl if you’d like to join them, why don’t you just ask in light hearted way, ‘if you ladies are getting together before our meeting, I’d love to join you, would you mind if I come?’. If they say they’re drinking and think you may not be comfortable, just tell them, it doesn’t bother you and you’ll bring your own. If it’s such a big deal to the…[Read more]
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