• cog2019 posted an update 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    I just wanted to say how grateful I am for this community. Although I may post and comment sporadically, I often lurk for a few minutes during each day just to stay motivated. Thank you!

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Thank you for posting this. I tend to do the same and I also worry about how being AF will change my relationship with my husband. I am glad that you are feeling strong and moving forward taking care of yourself.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Hi there, I read your profile and you aren’t weak! Alcoholic is addictive. Have you read the Naked Mind by Annie Grace? I just read it and found it really interesting.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Hi Westcoast, we are glad you are here.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Thanks for dropping by, it is great to hear you are doing so well.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Welcome from one hiker to another!

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    I am sorry to hear about your husband, but so glad you are finding some support. You are doing a great job staying AF under such challenging circumstances.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Thank you everyone for your thoughts. It has been an interesting month, to say the least, but I sure love the feeling of not waking up in the middle of the night and being awake for two hours trying to decide if I had a drinking problem. And I am feeling pretty strong dealing with my mom’s mess right now.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Yes, they are definitely moving into the more self sufficient time (well the older ones) but it can still be challenging. The end of the day crabbiness can really be exhausting. Mine are 13 and 17 and pretty independent, but there are other issues that show up (I swear my 13 year old can make me cry easier than anyone) and after a full day of…[Read more]

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    A couple things that worked for me (I always drank as I cooked dinner) was to have a fancy alternative beverage, to just not cook, or to do another activity that got me out of the house. I know #2 and 3 aren’t possible for everyone (at least all the time).

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    That would be hard – especially if you feel like she is normally the accepting one. Can you figure out anything else that might be making you crave a drink?

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Sending positive thoughts to you and your family. End of life with someone is so hard, but gives us so many opportunities too. I am so grateful I had that time with my dad when he passed, and hope it is the same for you.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    You can do it. I know what works is really individual, but I have a lot of those same triggers. I mix a kombucha I like with seltzer in a nice glass and for some reason it seems to help. How old are the kids?

    • Thank you! They are 13, 10, and 3. So I took the 3 year old with me to feed the pigs and then the older two watched him while they were all outside. I am doing ever so much better than I did when they were 10, 7, and 1 and I just couldn’t escape the nightly whining and fussing and they were too young to be left unattended.

      • Yes, they are definitely moving into the more self sufficient time (well the older ones) but it can still be challenging. The end of the day crabbiness can really be exhausting. Mine are 13 and 17 and pretty independent, but there are other issues that show up (I swear my 13 year old can make me cry easier than anyone) and after a full day of…[Read more]

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    Hurray! Congratulations.

  • cog2019 posted an update 1 month, 3 weeks ago

    I have been away for a while visiting my mom. It has been quite a ride. I have been AF for over a month now and it is working for me. Some days have been a challenge but most have gone pretty well. The easy days have been due to some unpleasant circumstances (keep reading) but the one most challenging day was interesting. I took four days to…[Read more]

    • Congrats on living the sober life! I get the nature thing. I was alone and relaxed walking next to a pond on a beautiful autumn day and thought no one would know if I had a bottle of wine. I didn’t but hit a meeting first thing the next morning and shared that. They all nodded knowingly. Just another experience to get through sober and next…[Read more]

    • Well done at setting boundaries with your mom, not everyone can do that with someone who is that close to them! Funny how something as serious as a DUI can be a positive but I definitely see how it is in this situation! Good luck with your mom and congratulations on being AF for over a month!

    • I’m wishing you and your mom a healthy, happy, lifelong, empowering, enriching recovery. Hey, that sounds pretty good–I’ll take one, too.

    • Wow you are doing so well not grabbing for that wine given the circumstances. Good on you.

    • So well done lovely! ❤️

    • Thank you everyone for your thoughts. It has been an interesting month, to say the least, but I sure love the feeling of not waking up in the middle of the night and being awake for two hours trying to decide if I had a drinking problem. And I am feeling pretty strong dealing with my mom’s mess right now.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 2 months, 1 week ago

    I am so glad you will be able to be there for him AF, and I am glad he is going to be ok. One of my motivations for going AF is my older teen son as well. I didn’t stop early enough, but I hope I will set an example now, and I am in a much better place to talk to him about all of the downsides of alcohol. Good luck.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 2 months, 1 week ago

    Proud of you for staying strong yesterday and today. And I am so happy to hear that you had a supportive co-worker. That counts for a lot.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 2 months, 1 week ago

    It is tricky when we change and then we have to see our (and others) old behavior in a new light. If you don’t think he is going to change and you don’t want to withdraw from the friendship, I think your idea of going out of town is a good one. Maybe that way he will stay in a hotel downtown and not drive and put others’ lives at risk.

    • Good on you for helping your friend and even more good on you for deciding not to stick around for it next time 😊👍🏼

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 2 months, 1 week ago

    Just want to send you some positive vibes and say that you have already helped and inspired others. You are doing great. Feeling like you are not being good enough might be the alcohol brain trying to get back in control, if it can convince you to feel that way maybe you will drink in order to feel better. Tell it NO.

  • cog2019 posted a new activity comment 2 months, 1 week ago

    Thank you so much. I am going to use this for my meditation tonight.

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