• Hey folks! Just popping in to say that I will not be drinking today. Hope you all have a beautiful day/night and choose life too!.

  • Buckeyeone posted an update 4 days ago

    Hello folks! Today’s inspirations and thoughts come from Tim Johnson. I hope you enjoy watching this and learning about how we can have power over so many things with just 3 simple suggestions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufa-E4N_SAA

    Keep on keeping on!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 4 days, 2 hours ago

    I can’t post today on my own, so I will post here:

    Hello folks! Today’s inspirations and thoughts come from Tim Johnson. I hope you enjoy watching this and learning about how we can have power over so many things with just 3 simple suggestions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufa-E4N_SAA

    Keep on keeping on!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days ago

    @freedom1025, what a beautiful number. You are truly an inspiration to others. Congratulations on your fabulous quadruple digits!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days ago

    I believe living up to and comparing myself to others is part of what stressed me out and led me to drink more than I ever should have. Now that I am not drinking, I am excited to find out who I really am, with my expectations, not others. Nice number!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days ago

    Hi, we are glad you are here.

    • Thanks Buckeyeone, it’s good to know I am not alone. Drank less yesterday night, but even 1 glass is too much for me, I know that. Plan to try harder today, step 1 is to read the sober tool box.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days ago

    Welcomed! You have landed in a great place.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days ago

    @happymoods, Congratulations on day 23. Maybe you can make yourself some nice cinnamon and honey tea. It seems to help me when I feel stressed. Keep on keeping on!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days, 9 hours ago

    Congratulations on tackling the first three weeks. Keep on walking and learning. An illusion is a great word to describe the lies we have been fed.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days, 9 hours ago

    Glad you had a fabulous time of it! Congratulations on day 448. You are awesome!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days, 9 hours ago

    Great job on getting past the hardest days. Keep on keeping on!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days, 9 hours ago

    Beautiful!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days, 9 hours ago

    I love your reminder card idea and motivational technique. Congratulations on 23 awesome days.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days, 9 hours ago

    It is definitely part of the process. https://lyingminds.sixboats.co.nz/links/

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days, 19 hours ago

    @Tom4500, you are so right! I have plenty of me time to work on not drinking and self-improvement. It is quite a project I have been engaging in to stay on the right path and discover who I really am without the poisons. Upwards and onward!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 5 days, 20 hours ago

    Good! I am in a great place mentally trying to beat this demon. I have hope and believe in me. Thank you, @Winner for always staying by my side. Happy almost 10-month anniversary!

  • I opened the Toolbox under reading material, and I came across this posted by @daveh, and highly recommend this for new and relatively new folks recovering. https://lyingminds.sixboats.co.nz/links/

    Keep on keeping on my friends!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 6 days, 1 hour ago

    Perfect!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 6 days, 1 hour ago

    You are brilliant, and so I will be borrowing your saying in two weeks when I am on vacation: “We don’t drink on vacation because the vacation ends but our drinking doesn’t”.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 6 days, 1 hour ago

    Congratulations on almost triple digits! You can do this!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 1 week, 5 days ago

    I love that you were able to plan a memorial for your sister. Question, as I will be visiting Half Moon Bay, California in a few weeks: Where specifically is the Avenue of Giants and the tunnel with the Big Foot carving. Do you know how far it is from San Francisco?

    • @Buckeyeone Avenue of the Giants is about 3 or 4 hours north of Half Moon Bay…the Drive thru tree park is in Leggett. There are giant redwoods near to the city, Muir Woods and other locations. Purisima Creek Redwoods are right near Half Moon.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 1 week, 5 days ago

    Fabulous, @NickiC, Keep on keeping on!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 1 week, 5 days ago

    Congratulations, Shez! Keep on keeping on!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    Thank you @Jesss, @Picklegirl, @Seni, and @jocord. I guess I just have to get in my head that I want (need) to quit more than I want (need) to drink and follow your suggestions. I have a lot of time to work on me this summer during my break. Thank you all for your friendship and support.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    Way to stay strong, @Liam. Now you know you can beat the wine witch.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks ago

    @Dave, from the bottom of my heart, thank you!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks ago

    Appointing yourself photographer was a brilliant way to keep yourself accountable. Glad you had a fabulous day.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks ago

    She sounds like a keeper! You are very lucky to have such a loyal and loving friend. Hope you had a great time.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks ago

    Thanks, @sobere, I really needed that today. Keep on keeping on!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks ago

    I am so sorry for your loss, @Lee. It sounds like you have a great plan in place to deal with her passing. I believe you will be a beacon for hope at the funeral.

  • Buckeyeone posted an update 2 weeks ago

    Hi everyone! Today I am resetting my ticker for what I pray is the last time. I am very good at going a few days sober, always so proud of myself and the new life I am creating, then something overwhelming swirls within my brain and I can’t seem to let it go until I pour the poison down my throat. So today, I am asking you what did you do the first days and weeks that were the most difficult? Walking forward facing the sun.

    • When things get really brutal for me i put it off. I adopted the “I’ll sleep on it” mentality early on. I would have HARD CORE cravings and tell myself i could drink tomorrow. I would be absolutely convinced in that moment TOMORROW WAS THE DAY. It gave me a little bit of peace about it. But….everytime i woke up in the morning i changed my mind. If it happened later in the day again, repeat process. I don’t know if this is the best advice, but it worked for me. 🌸

    • I just remember reading, reading, reading – this blog, the fantastic books from people telling about their lives (I read them again and again, couldn’t get enough of those experiences, thoughts, verities) and I watched documentaries on TV and Youtube, also again and again. It was heavy brain-washing and I did it as long as I had the desire to do it. It became less meanwhile, but from time to time I need to refresh… In my mind there was built up a total new view of alcohol, it became disgusting and absurd for me to drink the longer I dealt with those stories.

    • It seemed as if my thoughts ran 1000 miles a second the first month or so @buckeyeone, so when I talked myself out of drinking I thought many things at once. Like @Jesss I told myself I could drink tomorrow. I also had decided by day 4 I wasn’t going to drink again, so that option was taken off the table and I had to say to myself, “I dont drink-how else can I get through this?” Before that decision on day 4 the option was still there and I knew I would drink by the weekend. On day 4 I spent the entire day immersed in sober material. I came across Rational Recovery and went through the crash course, disbelieving it and feeling critical of it the whole time. By the time I was done with that I had decided to give it up for good. That decision moved me into a place of using other methods to cope. Like @Seni I watched videos, read, posted here, and threw temper tantrums in my head because I couldn’t drink. I did every trick all at the same time sometimes. Delay, distract, HALT, sleep, whine, post, eat sweets, do something for somebody else, anything to get one more sober day. And I kept on doing that until I didn’t have to do that anymore. I will admit that someone gave me homemade kahlua over Christmas and I took one sip just to satisfy that voice in my head saying “I wonder what it would taste/feel like now?” One sip and that voice went away. Turns out it didn’t have alcohol in it. See how powerful our thoughts are? One drink of what I thought was alcohol and it took that desire away. I didn’t mean for this to be so long, I just wanted you to know it wasn’t one thing that worked for me. It was many but the most important was the decision to quit for good. After that it was how to support that decision.

    • Thank you @Jesss, @Picklegirl, @Seni, and @jocord. I guess I just have to get in my head that I want (need) to quit more than I want (need) to drink and follow your suggestions. I have a lot of time to work on me this summer during my break. Thank you all for your friendship and support.

    • I do think reporting in every night is helping me immensely. How are you doing @buckeyeone? Did you get through day 1?

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks ago

    Hello, you have landed in a great place!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks ago

    Beautiful!

  • Happy weekend everyone! Last night I was tempted to drink as my husband was grilling out and having a few. I could have so easily gone out and had one, but deep down I knew the one would turn into 5 hours of drinking a dozen, waking up miserable, and having my liver hurt. So I listened to a podcast someone suggested called Recovery Elevator and did not step out on the patio. Later when he fell asleep the demon voices were still whispering so I chose to take a peaceful walk to clear my head. This morning when reading a blog I was introduced to the band Blind Melon and the song “Change.” So your thought for the day comes from some of the lyrics:
    When you feel your life ain’t worth living
    You’ve got to stand up
    And take a look around and you look way up to the sky
    Yeah, and when your deepest thoughts are broken
    Keep on dreaming boy, ’cause when you stop dreamin’ it’s time to die
    When life is hard, you have to change
    When life is hard, you have to change

    Keep on keeping on!

    • Well done awesome work, lovely lyrics 💕

    • Great song @buckeyone also love Recovery Elevator. playing that drinking tape forward is such a powerful tool! I had to do it a bunch during the first few month but now not as much. Keep on keeping on! It does get easier! xo

    • How great you took that wonderful “first aid kit”, the podcast, the walk, the music – instead of choosing the “easy” way what would have lead you into deep trouble and self blaming! 🙂

    • great post, @buckeyeone. so glad you are learning to exercise your sober muscles. as your muscles get stronger, so do you. be well.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 2 days ago

    Congratulations, and thank you for the encouragement. If you haven’t yet, look up the 21/90 rule. “It takes 21 days to create a habit, and 90 days to create a lifestyle'” Looks like you are well on your way in creating a new lifestyle.

  • Hello folks! I spent the majority of the day reading “This Naked Mind,” by Annie Grace. I chose to go to bed sober and plan on doing the same tonight. Today’s thought:

    “There’s no growth in the comfort zone and there’s no comfort in the growth zone.” ~Tim Elmore

    Today I will grow without comfort as I begin to heal my body, mind, and soul from this addiction and become stronger for it.

    Keep on keeping on my friends!

    • Hi @Buckeyeone! I just watched online a Pema Chodron retreat where she spoke about the comfort and growth zones. I had never considered that yes, I want to live in the comfort zone all the time, but I wouldn’t learn anything. Sheesh, being human is hard. Being sober is the best thing we can do to help. xo

    • hey, @buckeyeone, good to read from you. i remember when i was listening to recovery elevator podcast, he said number one, get out of your comfort zone. i was new to all of this recovery stuff and had no idea what that meant, i was thinking, everyday, every minute with out a drink is outside my comfort zone, let me just stay inside for a while while i deal with this new reality. so however you do it, glad to see you are doing it. be well.

      • So much truth in that @buckeyone! I’ll take those growing pains anyday over an alcohol saturated and miserable life!! Also love The Recovery Elevator podcast @kitten. Listen to it often. At least those growing pains aren’t constant. I often have long blissful moments (days) inbetween. 🙂

    • Hiya Buckeyeone, your post is great. It’s so helpful for the ‘growing’ pains one feels. When sober, we can choose when we want to hurt and grow or take it easy and rest. When drunk – there’s no development. I loved and still do a little to this day…the band name “Arrested Development”. That is such a truth in matters of persons growing up with drink. It is so common for teenagers to start this socially acceptable form of brain and social disorientation and they end up in adult hood – like moi – arrested in development – emotionally, psychologically… still, there’s hope here. We can re-train our brain. We can learn to feel again. & Love like we mean it.

    • Yay you!❤️❤️

    • So true @buckeyeone – it is uncomfortable to grow but it feels so good to see the accomplishment on the other side of it. Thanks for posting that today xo

    • Her book is fantastic

    • Love that book! It’s what got me going on this path. That – and finding this awesome community.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Keep on cutting! I have come to realize that if we don’t stop, we could be repeating some of the same behaviors that disgusted us, to begin with. Let the cycle stop and forge a straight path.

  • Hello folks! Today’s thought, “By changing your unconscious mind, we eliminate the desire to drink. Without desire, there is no temptation. Without temptation, there is no addiction.” Annie Grace

    Hope you have a beautiful day.

    Tammy

  • Hello everyone! Today’s quote is quite simple and to the point: “The pain of discipline is far less than the pain of regret.”
    ~Jim Rohn

    Have a great sober day.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    @JudyUS, I am grabbing your hand and walking beside you. Together this can be done!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    A beautiful testimony on the importance of sobriety. Hope you enjoy every second!

  • When does it end? It ends today! The other day in church, the priest emphasized how we should embrace change. This is something that is hard for me, as I have been white-knuckling this quit drinking thing most of the time. I am perfectly fine in the mornings, but as the day wears on… In addition, I always think ahead and fear upcoming events. I have thoughts such as, “How can I stay sober when I have this or that coming up soon?” Our society is so steeped in alcohol, it is sickening. Here’s a sample…So, tonight I have a mandatory meeting in a bar with the football coach and Senior parents. This weekend I have graduation parties and a Bridal shower that will have fufu drinks. In a few weeks, I head to California for a family vacation. But at the same time I know I have to quit, but more important than that is that I WANT to quit. I will not go to AA since I live in a very small town. This morning I ordered three books, “The Easy Way to Quit Drinking,” by Alan Carr, “The Naked Mind,” and “The Alcohol Experiment.” Some of my proudest moments is when I quit for 10 weeks last August to October. Any help from you all to get me back on track is greatly appreciated. @winner and @heidi19, Thank you for the shout-outs and calling me back.

    • @buckeyeone I can relate! The fallacy is that we think alcohol is our friend … that it’s going to deliver some THING, that it’s going to scratch an itch, fulfill a need. It never does. Some of my favorite Mrs D blogs are the ones where she says alcohol doesn’t enhance anything … it doesn’t make a party better or a vacation more magical. In fact just the opposite. switch your thinking from “I’m missing out to I’m gaining so much!” I know you can do this!

    • Welcome back @buckeyeone – you can do this 🙂

    • If you want to do this and I think you do! You have to have a plan for each event as it happens. Don’t look to far down the road, in this busy life you will always have occasions and they will allow you to wait! You are on the right track with the books. You have to decide drinking is not an option and then find the other options that work. Do you really want to get your buzz on in front of the coach and other parents or do you want to get everything out of this meeting and then lay your sober head on a pillow tonight? We believe in you and you deserve the happiness that an AF life will bring you. Congratulations on the 10 weeks last summer!

    • Hey my friend, you are hitting the negatives. I’m definitely no expert but I’m going through a load of social stuff too and I turn it around. I play a game where I spot the first to visibly relax, the first to breathe fumes in my face, the first to slur their words and the one who is quietly refilling quite a bit. I have the one whose paunch is all alcohol, the sweating one and the not so glamorous one now. I play it forward using other people and start relaxing myself feeling rather sanctimonious inside. The ultimate is the one who will be the old me in the morning and then I know I’ve made the right decision because my morning will be great. I sound like a crappy friend but it’s self-preservation because all these people are me. I would love to know any other tricks people use. I just think it’s better than crying in the toilet. Also, you can have one tomorrow if you still really really want one but not tonight. That helps me too.

      • @missbennet, I love this idea! I think you’re right that it’s about self! There’s lots of times during the day for kindness but drinking social events are about self preservation. I’m gonna try your idea

    • Hey @buckeyeone, you got this! The books you have got are good. I did the alcohol experiment on line, please give it a go. Also I do the HALT technique and it’s working for me. We both actually started to get sober about the same time last year but I had a different name. We are still here and we are still determined to keep trying and that takes strength and balls. I am with you every step. We can do it. I am not drinking tomorrow and I know you will join me.

  • Hello everyone! Last night was pretty rough with my mind telling my body what it should be doing to feed the demons. You know, the sneaky deceitful whispers to get you to pour the poison down your throat. Tonight I am going to keep really busy and think positive thoughts in hopes of putting out the sparks before they grow into consuming flames.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 5 days ago

    Welcome, @Space40

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 5 days ago

    Sounds like you are on the winning side of this nightmarish demon drink. You are beating this. Keep on keeping on!

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 5 days ago

    An angel looking after you. God saw that you were saved because he knows there are still many great things you can do for yourself, your family, friends, and even strangers. Grab hold of this opportunity and fly.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 5 days ago

    @Hammer123, congratulations on your 391 days. And thank you so much for the suggestion and encouragement. Have a beautiful day.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 5 days ago

    Congratulations on your 1150 days! Small steps turned into giant leaps.

  • Buckeyeone posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 5 days ago

    Beautiful!

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