• bluesmum posted a new activity comment 3 days, 5 hours ago

    Meet them for a cuppa another day….or a walk down the beach when they are hung over😉

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 4 days, 15 hours ago

    Morning I’m close with day 41….stay focussed on your happiness and health….sometimes it feel like a narrow bridge across hot lava…but it is the treasure..unfortunately guarded by the drinking dragon. Focus on your success

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 5 days, 8 hours ago

    Ok…give her the bat then😂

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 5 days, 9 hours ago

    What about your time as a present…ie the movies or shopping , something together maybe

    • She’ll feel ripped off lol, we live 2 doors down and walk our dogs together every night, have a coffee every Saturday and hang with my brother and nephew every Sunday. She’s probably sick of the sight of me haha.

      • I think the conservation gift is a great one, especially if she values preserving wildlife. I once gave my Dad a portion of a cow- which went to a woman in Africa and helped her to feed her children- and he’s even a republican. To be very honest, I kind of gave it to him because he is a republican and I couldn’t think of anything he really needed. So it gave me pleasure to help someone that needed a hand up, since his politics never would.

      • Ok…give her the bat then😂

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 5 days, 12 hours ago

    I wrote similar post after my family meal Sunday…..it is no excuse to be mean once you’re drunk

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 6 days, 11 hours ago

    Anyway you can get out of the house…or organise a comedy to watch…I’ve just seen otherhood…..might be right up you alley at the moment

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 6 days, 13 hours ago

    I’ve never been great at taking crap, but now I feel like saying…hey if you must preload for a family event maybe order food as soon as you arrive cos you’re mean on an empty stomach.😆😆😆

  • Went to a family dinner last night. Most people not drinking, but one that was and quite inebriated decided to have a subtle slice at me. Man it hit me hard as she would never have spoken to me like that sober. Today when she rang to see if we were all good, I felt like saying…why ..when you’ve had a few drinks do you feel you have the right to speak out in meanness. Why do we have to give drinkers a free pass? Stuff it!

    • Oh that guilty feeling the next day. It’s likely she did not mean what she said, and it was just that ugly poison speaking. But words have consequences. This could be a wake up call for her, or one of many. x

      • I agree with you here totally! I’ve made those tentative phone calls too full of regret over something said that I can’t quite remember the full details, purely because I was drunk. It’s true we hav ed to own our words and actions but I know for sure there’s so much I’ve said and done would never ever of happened had I been sober. And now I too have the regular pleasure of verbal abuse and tedious events putting up with dick head behaviour fuelled by drink. I just focus on how it does make people act like an arse and so glad I’m not the most uncool person in the room anymore.

      • I agree with you here totally! I’ve made those tentative phone calls too full of regret over something said that I can’t quite remember the full details, purely because I was drunk. It’s true we have to own our words and actions but I know for sure there’s so much I’ve said and done drunk I would never ever said had I been sober. And now I too have the regular pleasure of verbal abuse and tedious events putting up with dick head behaviour from people fuelled by drink. I just focus on how it does make people act like an arse and so glad I’m not the most uncool person in the room anymore.

    • You don’t have to. If they’re her words she can own them. Doesn’t mean a lack of understanding or compassion, quite the reverse I think. It’s important we realise how we are and what we do when we drink.
      Also when we stop drinking our boundaries seem to change…we stop settling for crap quite so much.

      • I’ve never been great at taking crap, but now I feel like saying…hey if you must preload for a family event maybe order food as soon as you arrive cos you’re mean on an empty stomach.😆😆😆

    • @bluesmum it’s hard, isn’t it? We want those around us to find what we’ve found. One off my daughters has a boyfriend who is the sweetest person, when he’s not drinking. Flies off the handle when he gets drunk. My heart hurts for him (terrible childhood and we’re his only family) but I can’t fx him, I can only love him. He knows my story and I hope when he’s ready he’ll feel comfortable talking to me. Until then, I wait.

    • It strikes me that maybe she has a drink problem. And if she does she is feeling jealous and anxious because you are succeeding where she is failing. She has lashed out, regretted it but I reckon she might just be reaching out for help. Take care @bluesmum, don’t have any regrets and maybe extend a tentative hand of compassion.

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week ago

    👍that lemon ginger sounds the go…I drink lemon ginger kombucha as a treat but crazy expensive

    • MaryB replied 1 week ago

      I like red tea no tannin in it red tea chia is lovely😺

    • Slice the ginger thin, heaps of it, about 6 slices per smallish pot and bash them with the handle of the knife to release the strength of flavour. Squeeze the lemon then throw a couple of bits in for good measure. When drunk pot, fill again with water and drink cold later….ice and mint is nice…or add sparkling mineral or soda water

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week ago

    I find it interesting you wondering if you would find pleasure in a bayou looking out over the water…I found pleasure last night watching the sunset as I pumped petrol into my car.! The last rays of warmth stayed on me long enough for me to pay, hang up the nozzle and leap back into the car , full of groceries….I’m finding pleasure in the small things now…in the moment…if you go back to that bayou, take three rocks in your seat, sip an amazing AF concoction, breathe deeply and think of me pumping gas.😉

  • bluesmum posted an update 1 week ago

    What are you guys drinking for hot drinks?….I went to the dentist today and he said…how long have you been a smoker? I’m not! But I’m drinking so much tea I’ve stained my teeth…..he’s removed the stain but said It’s the tannin…so what’s an alternative..cos turns out I’m a big drinker…hot or cold 😂😂😂 are there other options you guys are using….I need about 9 cups a day. So it’s got to taste good…..hot totties are off the menu😉

    • Licorice tea for me, or whole pots of lemon ginger and apple tea with lots of fresh ginger and lemon added. Lovely hot or cold. Feels soooo good for my body, cleansing. Plus it’s pink and looks real nice. Its by Healtheries

      • 👍that lemon ginger sounds the go…I drink lemon ginger kombucha as a treat but crazy expensive

        • MaryB replied 1 week ago

          I like red tea no tannin in it red tea chia is lovely😺

        • Slice the ginger thin, heaps of it, about 6 slices per smallish pot and bash them with the handle of the knife to release the strength of flavour. Squeeze the lemon then throw a couple of bits in for good measure. When drunk pot, fill again with water and drink cold later….ice and mint is nice…or add sparkling mineral or soda water

    • I have got some expensive charcoal toothpaste as I sip tea over hours. Do you have milk? That helps a bit.

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week ago

    Sounds like a fellow -I hate grocery shopper- to me.god I hate that job..always need a treat after it…I’ve put on a kilo since not drinking…treat…treats and more treats…oink oink I say!

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week ago

    Well done…excellent strategy for staying AF

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week ago

    You sound really frustrated and rightly so. I’m here to say..well done to you…it’s important what you have done and although it would be nice to get support elsewhere, be you’re biggest cheerleader!..my own sister asked me tonight how long this non drinking thing was going to go on for…..🤦🏼‍♀️ So BACK YOURSELF..cos others don’t always have the insight….lecture over😉

    • Thanks, @bluesmum You are right! I know I’m the only one who’s going to make me happy. And sober is happy for me now and forward. Maybe he’s in it, maybe he’s not, won’t matter if I got my own back. 🙂

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 3 days ago

    We handed back a bottle the other night and the giver said…oh no thanks…I don’t drink that crap….we all laughed really hard as he’d been gifted it in the first place and was trying to regift.

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 3 days ago

    Sometimes mine was morning….then afternoon…..then evening…originally I broke it into chunks……days were tooooooo long😂

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 3 days ago

    I’d almost forgotten the midnight peeing and 3am peeing and painkillers at 7……the money saved calculator should include painkiller bills as well🤣

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    Living on the edge!

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    I agree this time the second time does seem harder…the first time I gave up to buy a house, have children etc..this time I’m the only one not drinking in a house of four adults…I don’t have the big goals I had….it’s just for me….but me is a good enough reason.

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    Day 1 is rough…it’s like the bear hunt kids story…you can’t go over it, you can’t go round it…you have to go through it…just hold on tight and treat yourself like gold….very easily irritated and irrational …but still …gold!

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    Your body is going to thank you for it..well done ✅

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    We got you covered buddy!

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    I am on 32 days sober this time..but did 24 years previously…and I can tell you that for me the chatter slowed down over time…like an annoying relative..that when they speak…you notice it…but don’t take it in..and it is less and less relevant to you…as long as you reinforce….I am not a drinker…it’s a thing of the past and my life is so much better without that crap. Good luck…file the chatter under…old news.

    • @ bluesmum, I had nearly 25 years preciously, I found this time round tougher even though my drinking was a shorter period and never as heavy as before my first sobriety.

      • I agree this time the second time does seem harder…the first time I gave up to buy a house, have children etc..this time I’m the only one not drinking in a house of four adults…I don’t have the big goals I had….it’s just for me….but me is a good enough reason.

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    Morning @kyliezara hope all is well with you.

    • Day 1 😏

      • Day 1 is rough…it’s like the bear hunt kids story…you can’t go over it, you can’t go round it…you have to go through it…just hold on tight and treat yourself like gold….very easily irritated and irrational …but still …gold!

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    Grab a teenager to watch with…makes it just the bit more embarrassing for you both….good times

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 1 week, 6 days ago

    My children see me laughing till tears at f/b posts…ie…mis heard words in songs…hold me closer tony danza etc…when they say..what is wrong with mum…my husband says…she’s high on life….sad to think they are not used to seeing me laugh that hard over funny stuff. Now when you cry…and stop…does it feel pretty good really?…it does for me….

  • bluesmum posted an update 1 week, 6 days ago

    32 days sober…I thought The Croods were bad for a cry session, then I watched the rugby😳. Went out for a nights dancing, with drinking friends..interesting and sad to watch them unravel as the alcohol takes effect…..some couples arrive well but at each other’s throats by home time….like a bad movie….how can that be fun…cheap night for me $3.50 for whole night…and offered to drive everyone home.For me…I used to think…of course they’re drinking….they are having a crap time in their life/marriage/chikdren…but now …I’m thinking…you’re in a crap situation ..why are you pouring alcohol all over it? I keep these thoughts to myself. When my young adult arrives home with new girlfriend…I am sober and able to get out the baby photos…..it’s the small things😈

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks ago

    Go to the light 🤯

  • bluesmum posted an update 2 weeks ago

    Just watched Croods movie with my seventeen year old…animated movie aimed at 5-10 year olds. Cried and cried….shoot me now! Day 31

    • Ro replied 2 weeks ago

      lol

      • Ro replied 2 weeks ago

        Congrats on day 31 btw! Having a good cry is par for the course just run with it happens at the strangest moments

    • Ohhhhh, I love Croods, such a funny movie! I haven’t seen it in forever 🙂 A cry feels so good sometimes, even if it is for animated characters xo

    • hahaha! That’s so cute. Yes, weird emotions come…..in the strangest ways but it’s a nice signal things are going back to normal somewhat. 🙂

    • A cry can feel good….yes?
      Following your footsteps on Day 31 my friend xo

    • never cried much at all before quitting drinking, @bluesmum, but now…. congrats on day 31, glad you enjoyed a good cry.

      • My children see me laughing till tears at f/b posts…ie…mis heard words in songs…hold me closer tony danza etc…when they say..what is wrong with mum…my husband says…she’s high on life….sad to think they are not used to seeing me laugh that hard over funny stuff. Now when you cry…and stop…does it feel pretty good really?…it does for me….

    • That’s funny. Should I watch that movie? Maybe I have?

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 2 days ago

    Punching bag sounds good. And maybe a bat. Some numbchucks. ……..just woken up and still bugged as you may guess.

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    They definitely are a pain…and I have to be…sensitive to the situation🤯

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Day 28…gaining weight rapidly….loving the ice cream…my new motto…you want it…have it…re food is not really helping🤦🏼‍♀️

  • bluesmum posted an update 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    Afternoon, having issues with those dealing with my teen and just want to kill them all……argh or at least give them a literal slap. The joys of being alcohol free. My patience…normally on zero has dropped to -35 and falling. I don’t care if they are menopausal ,about to be divorced or the pope…I have no time for it. Day 28/29

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    👍 Have a great day. Keep your ears on and your wits about you….see you day 28

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 4 days ago

    It’s ironic how it even picks out the ideal drinks…not too strong…Bayleys…more like an adult milkshake for doing such a great job.😉

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 4 days ago

    I know many who no longer watch the news. At first I thought…harden up…face reality…but as I get older I think….maybe avoiding things that you have no power over, that make you sad …is not the worst thing you can do for yourself.

  • bluesmum posted an update 2 weeks, 4 days ago

    Had a great day today day 27…ironically little voice said as I walked in the sunshine….what a great day…you should have a Bayleys when you get home to celebrate!….good trick…not!

    • Yeah… weird how those thoughts pop up just when you’re feeling really good about being clean and healthy. It’s a little jarring sometimes (for me).

      • It’s ironic how it even picks out the ideal drinks…not too strong…Bayleys…more like an adult milkshake for doing such a great job.😉

    • Pops into my mind constantly. Was shopping today and whipped my head around looking for milk and found a wall of cold beer about twelve inches from my face. I whipped my head back the other way just as fast and even though for a split second there was that annoying “you totally could just…” I pushed it away and went to find the milk and didn’t think about it again. Ugh.

    • Starting Day 27 here 🙂 I’ll watch for that little voice. Thanks for posting. Good to see you doing well.

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 4 days ago

    As long as you need…don’t feel pressure to get back out there….do things in small slices of time. You can do it…6 days of your body saying thank goodness

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 4 days ago

    Better than Brad Pitt in Thelma and Louise …..

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    I’ll take two thanks…one for now and one for tomorrow at 5pms witching hour!

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    Jennah….where oh where do you live?…they are the most amazing thick chocolate coated with thin layer of boysenberry covering creamy vanilla ice cream….one ice-cream=3 pies😉calories wise…jokes……just writing this has my mouth watering

    • Yuuuuummmmmyyyy!

    • @bluesmum, sounds delish!! When I first read your post, I thought you were having some kind of major meltdown 🙁 haha. Good thing you weren’t!! I filled my face with chocolate covered açai and blueberry last night 🙂 Also YUM. I get them at Costco 🙂

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    I’m going to need a Memphis meltdown support group soon😉

  • bluesmum posted an update 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    26 days….another Memphis meltdown…

  • bluesmum posted an update 2 weeks, 5 days ago

    Morning @jennah thanks for checking on me. Managed to lock myself out of the site👍 I’m all good though…went out twice in weekend…AF…. coped well but left early….Are you all good?

    • Going out twice in one weekend AF is great! I went out on Saturday and had a wonderful evening AF. Glad you’re doing well 🙂 Just finishing my Day 25 and I believe you’re just starting Day 26? I’m in North America and since you said Good morning I’m guessing you’re on the other side of the world. Have a great day @bluesmum!

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 2 days ago

    Jennah…is 10 th July your last drinking day…if so we are sober twins!😉

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 4 days ago

    Your children will remember that and hopefully pay it forward to your grandchildren…….that’s what I’m hoping anyway👍

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 5 days ago

    To Frog…be the mum you wish you’d had. I spent many summers under the pub pool table, sometimes left behind when inebriated , popular parents left forgetting I was there. The memory stays.

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 5 days ago

    You are on a roll…maybe not at golf but by looking after yourself and being kind to yourself. Imagine the mental beating you would have given yourself if you had cracked open the bottle. 10/10 from me!

  • bluesmum posted a new activity comment 3 weeks, 6 days ago

    Same…Brody Retallick pain was hard to watch sober…I’d normally have been in a fog by then.👍

  • bluesmum posted an update 3 weeks, 6 days ago

    Big birthday in our house this weekend. Rugby Saturday night with whisky tasting and beers. I sat sipping away on my organic ginger and lemon drink. Actually ended up being a fun night with only one person miffed I wouldn’t taste her $120.00 whisky. Life goes on…bought new shoes with the money I’ve saved so far…yeah me.

    • @bluesmum, it’s great when you comment on a game these days and it isn’t coming out in an uncontrollable slur. Good on you for sticking to your guns… 120 bucks on 1 bottle of booze… hmmmm, no way 😂

    • Love your idea of buying new shoes with the money you’ve saved so far. Keep treating yourself….you deserve it xo

    • Never understood why people get annoyed when you choose not to drink. Good on you for sticking to your guns. <3

    • yeah you, @bluesmum, i spent every single penny of “saved” money, sometimes that day, if needed to, like a nice fancy soda i would never have bought in the past, wandering around stores instead of being inside at night, or saved it up and spent is on a new blanket, a candles, a juice machine, a kitten. it is a good idea, enjoy your shoes and thanks for reminding me, i have some money to spend, i have not been doing that lately. congrats.

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