• BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    What a wonderful trip! My daughter lived in the Notting Hill area when she studied abroad last fall…very pretty area to at least check out. Not sure if you’re into tours, but I HIGHLY recommend The English Bus Tour to Bath, Stonehenge and a “secret place.” The “secret place” will prove to be very entertaining for your daughter if she’s into theatre and the like. Check out the reviews on Trip Advisor. I’ve been to Paris a few times, and honestly got more out of leaving the city and heading to Monet’s Gardens or Versailles. Have a great time!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Good for you, Island One!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    I don’t know how far along you are, but sobriety can feel fragile and vulnerable, especially in certain situations and with certain people, places and things when so very much tied into the booze…can REALLY get under our skin! I can relate. Do you have to go this year?

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Love it…great reminder!

  • Glad Mrs. D. recently had “Dear Day One” blog…mostly lurking and putting together days as best I can. TONS of medical issues going on with family members…biopsy for husband yesterday, stepson seeing caridiologist, mom admitted last night to hospital with heart concerns and a niece who is still in a medically induced coma after having a baby then surgery for brain anusrysm….all in one week! Getting lots of support from daughters two and three and have to steer clear of oldest whose immaturity and insecurities are very apparent at times….I’ll be damned if she’s going to pull out every nasty thing she can think of when questioned about things that should be of a real concern. We all see it, not just me as the mom. Really enjoying blog posts from gal at “God Walked Into This Bar.” Last night’s:
    “No Matter How Many Mistakes You Make Or How Slow You Progress,
    You Are Still Way Ahead Of Everyone Who Isn’t Trying.”
    That’s going to be my mantra.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    @reena …thanks for the “shout out!” So glad to hear you are doing well…sounds like life is very sweet for you. And honestly, if you can keep the “odd drink” where it needs to be and not have it take over your life, then good for you. Most can’t, but I certainly don’t begrudge those that are able to do so….no shame or guilt. Those are the very emotions, plus a heap of anxiety that got me to drinking during my divorce years ago. Enjoy your week!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Thanks @Frog. To hear your daughter say she doesn’t even like you hurts very much. She doesn’t respect me and is going out of her way to say hurtful things. But then she will expect help or ask for things. I am being used….but no more.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    @Liberty, you certainly didn’t say anything wrong. The written word is sometimes hard to convey in what we are feeling or meaning. I always appreciate your support.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Thanks @ Liberty..not looking for validation, just needing to share. I have very few wmho know “all” about me.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Yes, @seedynomore, you are so right. Some of the problem?? I don’t even let my girls know when I have have a good run towards sobriety…I don’t trust myself and I don’t want to disappoint them. So a no win situation. Two and half weeks?? No one banks on that. In the meantime my 28 year old daughter dates someone for four months with a green card and has no idea where they even live!! And yes, I worry. God help me.

    • Crikey @backwoodsgal Yep thats worrisome for sure. Actually my cousins daughter did that too. Very stressful situation. Thankfully her daughter woke up to herself. I think sometimes we just have to let our kids take the hard road and learn from it but very stressful though xx

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Thank you for your kind words ….I am besides myself on what to do.

  • I feel a responsibility on here…don’t want to pull people into my life and then just disappear. Because I think most of you are like me…genuine, concerned, real. And that is truly me too…so sorry…even after the Laura and Holly yoga session, I just need to hide in a hole, my eldest daughter’s words today just cut me to the bone. I don’t care about not drinking, I just care about making it through today.

    • I’m so very, very sorry, @BackwoodsGal. I have had my own child’s words cut me like that on more than one occasion. The hurt is so profound. Take care of yourself. That is all you can control. My arms are outstretched towards you. Wish I could give you a great big hug. Please take care. Time will make this better. Comfort and peace to you.

    • Hi @backwoodsGal so nice to see you active on here again. I remember you well from when I first joined here. I also remember you posting a similar post about your daughter. I guess things won’t change til we do and I’m so happy you are back giving this your best shot. It was my kids that spurred me on to become alcohol free and now that I am the guilt when we have a run in about something just isn’t there. Removing alcohol from the picture heals so much in such a short space of time. Its amazing really and we are so lucky we have the opportunity to do that. Big bear hugs frim me to you XO

      • Yes, @seedynomore, you are so right. Some of the problem?? I don’t even let my girls know when I have have a good run towards sobriety…I don’t trust myself and I don’t want to disappoint them. So a no win situation. Two and half weeks?? No one banks on that. In the meantime my 28 year old daughter dates someone for four months with a green card and has no idea where they even live!! And yes, I worry. God help me.

        • Crikey @backwoodsgal Yep thats worrisome for sure. Actually my cousins daughter did that too. Very stressful situation. Thankfully her daughter woke up to herself. I think sometimes we just have to let our kids take the hard road and learn from it but very stressful though xx

    • Hi @backwoodsgal, am glad you posted here. I think staying connected in whatever way is possible, even when our most painful buttons are pushed – that can help us heal and change things. Which is all very well – it’s truly very, very hard at times.
      You have my compassion at the struggle to deal with your daughter’s words. I’ve just had my buttons pushed by someone else and I could leave – not quite the same with family. Take the time you need. xx

    • I am so sorry @backwoodsgal. I was excited for you to go see the hip sobriety people and do yoga. It sound so wonderful (and I admit, I was a little jealous.) But, I am sorry for your hurt right now. Do something for yourself, a bath, a walk, a primal scream out in the woods and go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day and sleep is a wonderful healer. xx

    • Thanks @Frog. To hear your daughter say she doesn’t even like you hurts very much. She doesn’t respect me and is going out of her way to say hurtful things. But then she will expect help or ask for things. I am being used….but no more.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Yes…organization, control, anxiety….fits me to a tee too and called for heaps of wine!

  • My “ticker” says 16 days! Made it through serving alcohol to my guests, passing up the red stamp on the hand at the baseball game etc…and now super excited to be heading into Chicago today for a four hour yoga recovery session with Laura McKowen of the “I Fly At Night” blog and Holly Whitaker of Hip Sobriety. They also run the HOME podcast…I highly recommend any or all of their amazing recovery resources they have out there. I don’t know squat about yoga, so banking on their claim that no experience is needed, but I AM banking on some deep, emotional, in person connection with some very strong ladies which I am in desperate need of. I know their stories of where addiction led them and can be totally honest about mine…can’t wait until 4:00!!

    • @Backwoodsgal This sounds like an awesome day!! Let me know how it goes!!! I’m about 2 hours from the windy city (frequent there quite often because my sister lives there). I would love to go do something like this if its worth getting out for. Happy sober Sunday to you!!! Keep up the awesome work!! Happy day 16 🙂

    • I’m jealous you get to meet them- I love those ladies (in a deeply platonic way , dear wifey).

      Seriously their websites and the home podcast were great resources for me in my early days.

    • Love this!!!
      Day 16, way to go!!!

      Thanks for sharing the info about this yoga session. I just looked up the blog you mentioned and will do some reading after posting here.

      Enjoy today!!!
      xoxox

    • How awesome!!! I would love to see them! Enjoy and soak it in!!

    • Ooh those are two cool chicks, lucky you!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Yes Paula, it is important to recognize how we are wired as it helps us through the trying moments. Thanks for the feedback!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Thank you…it’s does feel like I “passed” some kind of test!

  • This afternoon and evening a bit of a struggle…got the call from my niece and her family asking if they could come and stay for several days starting tonight versus tomorrow afternoon! With the remainder of the house to be cleaned and groceries to be bought, let alone child proofing and making sure the dog was situated to be sequestered…Put my OCD tendencies and type A personality into a touch of overdrive. And yes, I REALLY wanted a BIG glass of wine! So as much as going out last night for dinner, telling my husband to go ahead and have a beer, and not even flinching, tonight just goes to show things are VERY fragile. Everything is now in order and I am letting out a big sigh of relief!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Thanks @jo14…just wanted to clarify…that is NOT me in the new avatar…haha!!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Sounds like a fun weekend…and improvement in math is well, always something to be grateful for!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Quite the sad story that obviously impacted you greatly. I believe your aunt is rooting for you with abandon.

  • BackwoodsGal‘s profile was updated 2 years, 2 months ago

  • “You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the water slide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.”
    Tina Fey, Bossypants
    I love Tina Fey and I just read this quote in a magazine. It hit me enough to change my avatar, because it’s been more than long enough that I have been standing at the top of that “waterslide” knowing I needed to stop drinking for good. Time to go down that chute. It also reminded me of my grade school science teacher, who would say when entering his classroom, “Come on in, the water’s fine.” Thank you to all here who continue to show me “the water’s fine.” Day 14

  • BackwoodsGal changed their profile picture 2 years, 2 months ago

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Hi @morgan, I think the longer I don’t drink, the more my “friend” list may dwindle. That is, the people I consider my true blue friends. Yours sounds passive aggressive, tricky and needy! Hope your weekend turns out well!

    • Tricky indeed. So very sad as it always becomes apparent why she is so lonely. At times she does a big self change thing, but it dies away and everyone else gets blamed for her sad life. Now I am at work, the. Tomorrow family things, so I am ‘safe’ til Wednesday! then lovely people to buffer. I am concentrating on a gorgeous menu 🙂
      Too entwined in so many ways @ashleyintheus 🙁 xxxxx

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Hi Thor…yep, looking forward to spending time with my niece from Wisconsin and her family which include her children ages three and four….nothing like little ones to keep you busy and make you smile…much better than mind numbing liquid. Have a great weekend!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Hi Soberwife….glad to see your post and no room for shame when it comes to reconciling our alcohol usage. It will keep us trapped. We are talking about powerful stuff that hijacks our brain and leads us down paths we never would have before ventured or stayed in, for that matter. I am only two weeks in this time. And if I thought I couldn’t come back on this site and receive the encouragement and support I needed, I certainly wouldn’t be here. We ALL get it!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Happy for you…one year!!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    I laughed out loud at that one too, @Tom4500!!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    I’ve been bringing in lilacs from my bushes every few days and putting them on my nightstand…going to sleep and waking up to their heavenly scent!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Fabulous…good for you!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Sorry to hear…nothing funny about a broken tailbone!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    I have many thoughts on your post, but the one that stands out is agreement that perhaps your sponsor did indeed forget what it’s like to be newly in recovery…same thing happened to me. And the other thought is just like with anything especially when dealing with people, “if the shoe doesn’t fit, try a different shoe!” Glad you have close friends in AA to suppprt you…sounds like you’ve been very committed!

  • Day 12, my youngest daughter (almost 21) is back from college and stayed with me last night and again tonight. If any of you recall, last year my drinking debacles caused her to spend little time with me, choosing to stay at her father’s instead. So, last night we talked, laughed, watched the Cubs and the NBA finals….I have always known she still loves me very much, her trust will need to be earned…on the road to doing just that!

    • How lovely! When we are sober, the time we spend with those we love has so much more depth and quality. So glad you had this with your daughter!

    • That has to help you in so many ways. Thanks for sharing that, I think it helped me too.

    • Thats fabulous @backwoodsgal 🙂 well done on day 12 xx

    • She is probably over the moon to have her Mom back. We really are very special to our kids. I can’t imagine my life without my Mom. I’m so happy for both of you. Keep up the good work, she is depending on you to do that. Congrats on Day 12!! That’s a great start.

    • How wonderful, if you ever feel the urge to drink again just remember this evening and how wonderful it was, there are many more out there waiting for you as a sober mum xx

    • good for you!!! Sounds like a wonderful time 🙂

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Wonderful post about what life can be like if we take out the drinking!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Gals to hear about the progress THor…for both you and your wife! Has she started much PT? That makes all the difference.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Sorry to hear about all your troubles. I agree with counseling for yourself, if OH wont go…can’t hurt, might help you sort it all out. If you find a good therapist, the benefit of having an impartial person listening (letting you unload) and then giving constructive feedback is immeasurable. I think when we’ve had our drinking history in the picture, we tend to internalize and blame ourselves for more than our fair share, at least I do.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Congrats on all those days! I hear over and over about the benefit of yoga for people in recovery. I am attending a recovery mini yoga retreat on Sunday and they said no experience required, I am banking on it as a newbie!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Wonderful!! So good to have those with many days on this site. Congratulations on this huge milestone!

    • I join on here when there were around 600 members and I haven’t looked back. It is a very positive powerful lovely site. There were and are many ahead of me that helped me hugely then. xox

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Hop right back on…a lot of us have been there. No shame.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Ashley….not trying validate the sugar consumption, I went to my bed with a handful of peanut butter m & m’s last night! But, I see it’s a pretty common issue for us in the beginning days. Alcohol was the way we were getting our sugar…so I am cutting myself some slack, knowing my body is noticing something is missing. Also seeing this calms down ….banking on it, right?? 🙂

    • I ate a package on the way home from work (peanut butter m & m’s). Yes but my issue is my binge eating came first… and then my binge drinking. Oh what a travesty…. I’m ok with it right now just trying to be conscious. Happy sober day to you!

  • Thinking of folks in Manchester and all the pain and sorrow. Makes my troubles seem small. Also,thinking about the latest report about how even a SMALL glass of alcohol for women per day increases somewhat dramatically the risk for breast cancer 5% premenopausal, 9% in menopausal women. Yikes…I can’t remember when my “pour” was only five ounces, let alone only limited to one drink. So, undoubtedly increasing my risk, several fold. Really hitting home how I am at an age where things can quickly go downhill when it comes to my health. Recently had a routine procedure for someone my age, showed “precancerous”, so another follow up sooner than usual. Blood pressure has been borderline as is cholesterol…so another prescription to fill each month. I have daughters to marry off and grand babies in my future…going to really think of that when a craving hits or I try to rationalize my drinking.

    • @backwoodsgal great reminder! You can do this!! Giving up the drink is worth our health 🙂

    • Scary stuff isn’t it? I have to say that since giving up I have NOT lost any weight but my general health has improved in every way and my mind is much sharper. I feel I am bringing my “A game” to life now. Not well known is the very negative effect alcohol has on our heart health too – so there are lots of benefits for you to look forward to in this area as well xx

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Hooray for you Jessi! Quite the milestone!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    @Gettingthere…change can be stressful, and our pets are our family. Wishing for all of you a smooth enough transition and strength in the days ahead. xx

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Way to go…enjoy and be proud!!

  • Double Digits! Trying to use the money I’m saving for very worthwhile things…a donation to a cancer survivor friend running in the Chicago marathon, money to recent graduates who have worked very hard for their degrees etc…not on “bring me down ” bottles of booze.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Five days is certainly momentum…good for you! And you are so right about wanting to get the drinking out of the picture before kids…no regrets, like I have.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    30 days is not only a round one, but a VERY signifiacnt milestone…congrats!

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Good for you! Congrats on all those days.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    It does all become relative, doesn’t it? When you put it all in perspective. Similar “first world” problems on my end….perfectly said.

  • BackwoodsGal posted a new activity comment 2 years, 2 months ago

    Me too! Glad you have a counselor now that can help you sort out all those feelings. I am thinking about making some appointments with mine. I had a very blue afternoon yesterday, too much thinking going on and me trying to speculate. Then a text from one daughter, a visit with some family and good conversation and voila, I realized how much I have to be thankful for. VERY important for me to keep in mind that my feelings and moods are temporary….the upswing is bound to be around the corner.

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